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| Member |
Why do scuba divers go out of the boat backwards? If they fell forward, they'd fall back into the boat.  | ||
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| Partial dichotomy |
On that same theme....ask me if I want to go scuba diving? No tanks. SIGforum: For all your needs! Imagine our influence if every gun owner in America was an NRA member! Click the box>>>  | |||
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| Savor the limelight |
Why are banjos better than bagpipes? They don't weigh as much and are thus easier to throw in the dumpster. I don't know any muscians jokes, but I know a lot of drummer jokes. | |||
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Member |
How can a man go without sleeping for 8 days? Easy, he sleeps at night. ________________________ | |||
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Certified Plane Pusher |
A Mexican magician tell his audience, "I will disappear on the count of three". He counts down..."Uno..Dos.." and then he disappears without a tres. Situation awareness is defined as a continuous extraction of environmental information, integration of this information with previous knowledge to form a coherent mental picture in directing further perception and anticipating future events. Simply put, situational awareness mean knowing what is going on around you. | |||
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| Certified Plane Pusher |
I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised. Situation awareness is defined as a continuous extraction of environmental information, integration of this information with previous knowledge to form a coherent mental picture in directing further perception and anticipating future events. Simply put, situational awareness mean knowing what is going on around you. | |||
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| Certified Plane Pusher |
What is Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination? HAAAAAAAANDDDD EYYYYYYYEEEEE. Situation awareness is defined as a continuous extraction of environmental information, integration of this information with previous knowledge to form a coherent mental picture in directing further perception and anticipating future events. Simply put, situational awareness mean knowing what is going on around you. | |||
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| Green grass and high tides  |
What did the fish say when hit his head on concrete? "Dam" So the horse walks into and sits at the bar. The bartender looks at him and say's. "So why the long face"? "Practice like you want to play in the game" | |||
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Drug Dealer |
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me. When a thing is funny, search it carefully for a hidden truth. - George Bernard Shaw | |||
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| Shit don't mean shit |
What do you call a deer that doesn't have any eyes? No-idear. What do you call a fish with 2 knees? A two-knee fish! | |||
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Member |
What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless I'm sorry if I hurt you feelings when I called you stupid - I thought you already knew - Unknown ................................... When you have no future, you live in the past. " Sycamore Row" by John Grisham | |||
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| stupid beyond all belief  |
When you see geese flying in a "V" do you know why one part of the V is longer than the other? Cause theres one more goose there.... What man is a man that does not make the world better. -Balian of Ibelin Only boring people get bored. - Ruth Burke | |||
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| Three Generations of Service  |
Okay, that took a second...  Be careful when following the masses. Sometimes the M is silent. | |||
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| Thank you Very little  |
What did Noah say as he was loading the Ark? "Now I herd everything "Why did the people on the ark think the horses were pessimistic? They kept saying neigh What animal could Noah not trust? The cheetah Why couldn't they play cards on the ark? Noah was sitting on the deck Who was the first canning factory run by? Noah-he had a boat full of preserved pairs Was Noah the first one out of the Ark? No, he came fourth out of the ark yes I know you want noah more..... | |||
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| Bunch of savages in this town  |
How do you get a witch pregnant? You fuck her. ----------------- I apologize now... | |||
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| Member |
Whats the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Beer nuts are $4, deer nuts are under a buck. | |||
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| His diet consists of black coffee, and sarcasm.  |
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Bad dog! |
That one actually made me laugh. I need to get more sleep.... ______________________________________________________ "You get much farther with a kind word and a gun than with a kind word alone." | |||
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| No, not like Bill Clinton  |
And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and you will receive eternal life." But John came fifth, and won a toaster. | |||
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| Member |
Took me a bit also. Have to sing it I guess. | |||
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