quote:

Originally posted by V-Tail:
I just got a car with one of those new-fangled automatic transmissions.

The car only goes when it is light outside.

It works fine when you choose D for daytime, but it won't move when you put it in N for night time.

Does anyone remember the Jerry Clower automatic transmission story? First time he drove one...

The gist of it... you can Imagine Jerry making 5 minutes out of this.

So...
"P" must be for parking... OK.
"N" for nothing it seems.
"L" for leaving? OK, that worked but it's kind of slow.
"D" must be for driving.
Yes! Now we are really moving along pretty good!
So... I figure "R" stands for racing.

That's when all hell broke lose!

No man should utter the words Yum Yum Sauce


It's seafood sauce twinkle toes

Just checking in. I got nuthin.

I needed to run to Target to pick up a couple of things.

Didn't bother to dress up.

After all, it wasn't like I was going to Walmart or anything.

At 1000 views of this thread, I'm declaring SIGFORUM bicurious: https://sigforum.com/eve/forums...0601935/m/2420041084

I have full time employment again. Only ten cents more an hour than the jail, but the benefits are so good, I'd be a damn fool to not take it.

That sounds really good. Good bennies are nothing to sneeze at. For me bennies are more important than pay. Good on you.

Also, I know how to forestall monkey butt.

quote:

Originally posted by Skins2881:
Verizon is coming to upgrade my internet today, I had to sign up for a higher speed to keep my bill from going up. Seems backwards I know, but whatever.

I had that at one point w/ Commiecast. I called to downgrade my service because it was getting too expensive. By downgrading I got faster internet.
Of course I asked, "Why do I have to call and find this out? Why not just increase it if I'm already paying more for it?"
I was dumber after listening to the answer.

A week or so ago I was shoveling the front walk and my snow shovel came apart; the screw holding the scoop and and shaft fell out, never to be found.
I knew there were some screws in our junk drawer so I started cleaning that out for the first time since, oh, maybe 2001.
In it, I found an envelope. In the envelope was a pistol barrel. A P239 .357sig barrel. A .357sig barrel I brought to the shop to maybe sell back in 2008 after my work closed down and I was looking for a little extra cash.

I greased it and tossed it into my P239 and went to the range. I was all

I went to the IHOP the other day and they gave me the senior citizens discount.
This was the first time I ever got that.

I feel old.

" ? "

Any day with good pizza and beer is a good day.
One good thing about the Northeast is the abundance of Mom-and-Pop pizza shops that offer excellent pizzas.

Do birds have polarized vision? Or how do they hunt for fish while flying above?

I love lamp.

I love all this talk about nothing
It's the only thing I know anything about

My feet feel like I've walked around in wet sneakers all day. And I haven't.

My pinky has been numb for a week now

$1400 for a new fish tank filter/pump. We will have a fish fry before that happens again

Neighbor upstream from me got orders to National Training Center in CA, (Army) I was helping him fix his sprinklers and I installed a window sill cause his beast ate the other one....we were talking and I found out both he and his wife are from Tampa....

First time in my life I have run into another honest to god fellow Floridian....(most people are transplants)

Now they’re moving.