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Three Generations
of Service
Picture of PHPaul
posted June 04, 2018 05:55 PMHide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Kevbo:
What did One frog say to the other frog?



Time’s fun when you’re having flies


One of my favorite sayings. I get the strangest looks sometimes...

Another: Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.




Be careful when following the masses. Sometimes the M is silent.
 
Posts: 15981 | Location: Downeast Maine | Registered: March 10, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted June 04, 2018 07:18 PMHide Post
http://niceonedad.com

On demand Dad jokes. Whatta country!


--
I always prefer reality when I can figure out what it is.

JALLEN 10/18/18
https://sigforum.com/eve/forum...610094844#7610094844
 
Posts: 2484 | Location: Roswell, GA | Registered: March 10, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted June 04, 2018 07:57 PMHide Post
quote:
Originally posted by 4x5:
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
.
.
.
.
Because 7 8 9


Because 7 was a registered 6 offender? Not so much a dad joke.
 
Posts: 7985 | Registered: October 31, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted June 04, 2018 10:21 PMHide Post
Did you hear about the farmer who got an award? He was outstanding in his field.
 
Posts: 186 | Registered: May 16, 2013Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of PakRatJR
posted June 04, 2018 11:36 PMHide Post
Two guys are walking down the street....

One guy walks into a bar......

The other one ducked



Last night I had a dream I was a muffler..

I woke up exhausted
 
Posts: 505 | Location: Sussex WI | Registered: April 04, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted June 04, 2018 11:42 PMHide Post
A blind man walks into a bar...

And then the table...and then the chair...
 
Posts: 3118 | Location: Germantown, TN | Registered: June 28, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of dsiets
posted June 04, 2018 11:55 PMHide Post
What happens when you run behind a car?
You get exhausted.

What happens when you run in front of a car?
You get tired.
 
Posts: 7831 | Location: MI | Registered: May 22, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Dances With
Tornados
posted June 05, 2018 10:00 AMHide Post
Dad joke? Ok.

A young man attending college gets engaged.

He asks his Dad “Dad, what does it cost to get married?”

Dad replies “I don’t know son, I’m still paying for it.”
 
Posts: 12155 | Location: Near Hooker Oklahoma, closer to Slapout Oklahoma | Registered: October 26, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of sigcrazy7
posted June 05, 2018 11:14 AMHide Post
One of my Dad's favorites.

Why do cowboys all have the same size balls?
.
.
.
.
.
So they can pull each other's trailers.



Demand not that events should happen as you wish; but wish them to happen as they do happen, and you will go on well. -Epictetus
 
Posts: 8301 | Location: Utah | Registered: December 18, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
So let it be written,
so let it be done...
Picture of Dzozer
posted June 05, 2018 11:49 AMHide Post
Did you hear they aren't going to be making toothpicks any longer??
.
.
.
.
.

Turns out they are long enough already. Wink



'veritas non verba magistri'
 
Posts: 4112 | Location: The Prairie | Registered: April 28, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Bald Headed Squirrel Hunter
Picture of Angus the Kid
posted June 05, 2018 12:59 PMHide Post
Two guys walk into a bar.

1st guy says, "I'll have H two O"

2nd guy says, "I'll have H two O too"

The 2nd guy dies.



"Meet the new boss, same as the old boss"
 
Posts: 6168 | Location: In the tent, in Houston, in Texas | Registered: October 23, 2002Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted June 05, 2018 01:06 PMHide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Lord Vaalic:
Why were the star wars movies released in off order 4,5,6 then 1,2,3?

Because in charge of planning Yoda was

Twice, this I told my Girlfriend. Twice, get it, she did not. Big Grin


--------------------------
Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.
-- H L Mencken

I always prefer reality when I can figure out what it is.
-- JALLEN 10/18/18
 
Posts: 9641 | Location: Illinois farm country | Registered: November 15, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of TigerDore
posted June 05, 2018 01:06 PMHide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Angus the Kid:
Two guys walk into a bar.

1st guy says, "I'll have H two O"

2nd guy says, "I'll have H two O too"

The 2nd guy dies.

Dad joke, if your dad was a chemistry major. But wouldn't the second guy just puke?



.
 
Posts: 9675 | Registered: September 26, 2013Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Bald Headed Squirrel Hunter
Picture of Angus the Kid
posted June 05, 2018 01:12 PMHide Post
quote:
Originally posted by TigerDore:
quote:
Originally posted by Angus the Kid:
Two guys walk into a bar.

1st guy says, "I'll have H two O"

2nd guy says, "I'll have H two O too"

The 2nd guy dies.

Dad joke, if your dad was a chemistry major. But wouldn't the second guy just puke?



.


No. In pure form, it's deadly.



"Meet the new boss, same as the old boss"
 
Posts: 6168 | Location: In the tent, in Houston, in Texas | Registered: October 23, 2002Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of maladat
posted June 05, 2018 05:56 PMHide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Angus the Kid:
quote:
Originally posted by TigerDore:
quote:
Originally posted by Angus the Kid:
Two guys walk into a bar.

1st guy says, "I'll have H two O"

2nd guy says, "I'll have H two O too"

The 2nd guy dies.

Dad joke, if your dad was a chemistry major. But wouldn't the second guy just puke?



.


No. In pure form, it's deadly.


Drug store hydrogen peroxide is usually 3% hydrogen peroxide, with the rest water.
 
Posts: 6323 | Location: CA | Registered: January 24, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
His diet consists of black
coffee, and sarcasm.
Picture of egregore
posted June 05, 2018 06:18 PMHide Post
Why is the Dachshund a cowboy's favorite dog? He wants to get a long little doggie.
 
Posts: 30024 | Location: Johnson City, TN | Registered: April 28, 2012Reply With QuoteReport This Post
His diet consists of black
coffee, and sarcasm.
Picture of egregore
posted June 23, 2018 03:23 AMHide Post
Air for your tires at service stations used to be free. Now it's a dollar. Inflation.
 
Posts: 30024 | Location: Johnson City, TN | Registered: April 28, 2012Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Muzzle flash
aficionado
Picture of flashguy
posted June 23, 2018 05:32 AMHide Post
quote:
Originally posted by maladat:
quote:
Originally posted by Angus the Kid:
quote:
Originally posted by TigerDore:
quote:
Originally posted by Angus the Kid:
Two guys walk into a bar.

1st guy says, "I'll have H two O"

2nd guy says, "I'll have H two O too"

The 2nd guy dies.

Dad joke, if your dad was a chemistry major. But wouldn't the second guy just puke?



.


No. In pure form, it's deadly.


Drug store hydrogen peroxide is usually 3% hydrogen peroxide, with the rest water.
Yeah. Medics can get 8% H2O2, though. The pure stuff is used for rocket fuel.

Back on topic, I don't remember my dad ever telling jokes.

flashguy




Texan by choice, not accident of birth
 
Posts: 27911 | Location: Dallas, TX | Registered: May 08, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
So let it be written,
so let it be done...
Picture of Dzozer
posted November 19, 2020 11:40 AMHide Post
Mom - "Oh, guess who I ran into at the grocery store? Sally!"

Dad - "Oh, did you knock her down?"



'veritas non verba magistri'
 
Posts: 4112 | Location: The Prairie | Registered: April 28, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
chickenshit
Picture of rsbolo
posted November 19, 2020 11:55 AMHide Post
I was going to post a Chemistry joke.

Then I thought, "Na"


____________________________
Yes, Para does appreciate humor.
 
Posts: 8000 | Location: East Central FL | Registered: January 05, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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