*Satire alert*

(Biden apparently cooked himself in the sun while on Christmas vacation)

quote:

White House Explains That Biden Smeared Suntan Lotion On His Sandwich And Spread Mayo On His Face, A Simple Mistake That Could Happen To Anyone Even Someone Without Dementia

Jan 3, 2024 · BabylonBee.com


WASHINGTON, D.C. — The White House explained today that President Biden's horrific sunburn occurred due to him spreading mayonnaise on his face instead of his ham sandwich, a snafu that could happen to anyone of any cognitive ability.

"We've all been there, right?" asked Karine Jean-Pierre to the White House Press Corps. "You've just finished applying the last touches of sunscreen to your ear lobes and realize -- oh shucks! I'm covered in Hellman's mayo! It happens to the best of us."

President Biden reportedly applied an entire jar of mayonnaise before laying out on the beach for 13 straight hours, broken up only by a lunch break where he devoured a sandwich covered in suntan lotion. "Spread it on!" said Biden as he put layers of lotion onto his square of wheat bread. "Ah, nothing like the beach and a sammy. Mm, delicious!" exclaimed Biden, before stuffing the entire thing in his mouth and reapplying an extra coat of mayo to his face.

According to the White House physician, the mayonnaise served as a sort of basting sauce and cooked the President to a safe internal temperature of 165 degrees. "The mayo served as an ideal insulation for heat, allowing the President to roast to an even temperature all over," reported Dr. Kevin O'Connor. "His skin is crispy, but the white meat still retained plenty of moisture. The effect of sixteen ounces of suntan lotion on his colon remains to be seen."

At publishing time, the spectacular effect of sixteen ounces of suntan lotion on Biden's colon had at last been seen.

Link

Infuriating. The news media lets him lie to our faces without calling him on it, and not little fibs about something in his past; big lies, like this.

Imagine Donald Trump telling a huge lie like this, and how they would react. There's no point in stomping around and railing about it, but it is indescribably infuriating that this piece of shit has so little respect for us that he does this all the time, and the press just looks the other way.

https://twitter.com/TimRunsHis.../1743377322265231869

His remarks will be part of the official record. To some they’ll be a historical record. Over a generation and oft repeated it will become fact and Jan 6th be forever distorted. It’s a lie. It’s propaganda.

Lies.... all lies:

President Biden Marks Jan-6 Anniversary (By Calling Trump A Threat To Democracy & Freedom)

President Biden's first major campaign event of 2024 is set to take place in the key battleground state of Pennsylvania. The president intends to persuade the American people - in a speech - that former President Trump, his most likely presidential election opponent, is a threat to democracy.

Biden is expected to speak at Montgomery County Community College, about 15 miles from the Revolutionary War encampment of Valley Forge, on Friday afternoon, one day before the third anniversary of the January 6 Capitol riot.

Biden's aides told Reuters that the speech's theme will be about "preserving democracy."

The president is expected to call Trump and MAGA Americans 'far-right extremists' and a genuine threat to the freedoms on which the country was founded.

The Biden-Harris campaign said Montgomery County Community College is a "stone's throw" away from the Revolutionary War encampment of Valley Forge. This is where then-General George Washington, leading the Continental Army, "transformed a disorganized alliance of colonial militias into a cohesive coalition united in their fight for our democracy" 250 years ago.

"This Saturday will mark the three-year anniversary of when, with encouragement from Donald Trump, a violent mob breached our nation's Capitol," Biden campaign manager Julie-Chavez Rodriguez told reporters earlier.

Rodriguez continued, "It was the first time in our nation's history that a president tried to prevent the peaceful transfer of power."

"Let's all take a moment to sit with the gravity and significance of the moment we're all living through," Biden communications director Michael Tyler told reporters later.

Tyler added: "The leading candidate of a major party in the United States is running for president so that he can systematically dismantle and destroy our democracy."

Whether the Biden-Harris campaign's big bet - to come out swinging and label Trump and MAGA Americans a "threat to democracy" - in a politically polarized country - pays off - remains to be seen in a period where polling data for the president remains dismal.

https://www.zerohedge.com/poli...at-democracy-freedom

Lights, camera … corruption! First son Hunter Biden's so-called “sugar brother,” Hollywood attorney Kevin Morris, is backing a soft-focus documentary on the disgraced and indicted presidential offspring.
First son Hunter Biden’s so-called “sugar brother,” Hollywood attorney Kevin Morris, is backing a soft-focus documentary on the disgraced and indicted presidential offspring.

While the first son’s life as viewed through his now-infamous laptop resembles a Quentin Tarantino film — with plenty of not-so-tasteful nudity — the untitled Morris project would show a more gentle Hunter “painting, selling his art, raising his son, and navigating everyday life as a sober adult with ongoing criminal investigations and in the crosshairs of [former President Donald] Trump and his supporters,” the Los Angeles Times credulously reported this week.

A film crew has been trailing Hunter, 53, for years and was most recently spotted recording the first son publicly defying a subpoena from the House Oversight Committee to sit for a deposition Dec. 13.

The Post has also noted the presence of cameras around the Biden scion, including when Hunter cozied up to one of our reporters at a December 2022 showing off his surprisingly pricey work at Soho’s Georges Berges gallery.

link: https://nypost.com/2024/01/04/...s-gauzy-documentary-

This whole “Biden at Valley Forge!” thing is turning out to be a farce, just like his entire presidency. Here they have us thinking he’s standing on the hallowed fields where Washington and Von Steuben once trod, but instead he’s like 10 miles away at Montgomery County Community College in Blue Bell, PA surrounded safely by hundreds or thousands of bussed-in Democrat extras to cheer him on:


https://x.com/jackposobiec/sta...408611705921923?s=46

Biden Claims He Doesn’t Have Enough Taxpayer Money to Protect the Border

https://slaynews.com/news/bide...ign=daily-newsletter

Is Joe being lied to?
By M.B. Mathews

There seems to be only one reason Joe Biden isn’t making better decisions: He is being lied to by his staff, other Democrats, and his advisors.

For example, anyone watching the news can see that the border is wide open, yet Biden & Co. keep saying either that the border is closed or that it’s “under control.”

Fact is, the border is wide open and not under control. Millions of people have come across our borders lately, yet Joe doesn’t seem to know that. If he does know it, he condones it, believing he is importing Democrat votes. That is malevolent.

There can be no other reason for the rampant tax increases than Joe’s policies, yet he blames “the rich.”

Or climate change. Has no one told him that his disastrous closing of the Keystone XL pipeline started this cascade of chaotic economic dominoes? Why is he blaming Republicans when they are not the ones responsible?

There is no reason for Joe to continue to tout “Bidenomics” unless he is being lied to.

These are policies that are devastating the middle class and hurting everyone else. But Joe seems too confident that Bidenomics is working. How do you believe such a monumental lie unless you are relying on aides and The View, all of whom are lying to you? He cites figures given to him that indicate his policies are working, yet average Americans know it is not only not working, it’s killing chances of workers retiring as planned, getting medical treatment, becoming prosperous, taking leisure time off, and putting good food on the table. It’s working, all right. It’s working taking everyone down except those immune to the economic pressures – his private jet buddies in the WEF, the Democrat party, and the like.

Was Joe lied to when he cut and ran from Afghanistan, leaving innocent people and billions of dollars in sensitive military equipment there? Who does that? Who told him that was a great idea? And why did he listen?

Was Joe lied to when someone told him that Iran is our friend and won’t use a nuke to destroy “The Great Satan” (America) or the “Little Satan” (Israel)? Trump had Iran wrapped up just right until Biden came along and reversed the sensible policy of viewing Iran as our enemy. Joe seems to think they are friends who won’t stab us multiple times in the heart and liver given a chance.

Was Joe lied to that millions of Americans are sympathetic to a musical gay Christmas in the White House halls and half-nude transexuals on the White House lawn? Did someone tell him that the majority of Americans accept such grossly inappropriate and de classe behavior?

Is Joe being lied to when sycophants tell him that the Green Agenda is based on legitimate data that the Earth is somehow in crisis, which it isn’t, and that Americans really slaver after electric vehicles, which they don’t?

Or is Joe just such a good prevaricator that he knows that what he is being told isn’t true and lies about it anyway?

Or is he stupid? Ignorant? Ill-informed? Intransigent? Many decades ago, Joe was known on Capitol Hill as being ineffectual, not very bright, and corrupt. That hasn’t changed, so now he gets to be effective at bringing down the greatest country on planet Earth.

How do you explain to decent people (and to Joe) that the bitter medicine Americans have been ingesting these past three years is really a deliberate and painful poisoning of the American bloodstream by the people who are really running the Biden administration? Who are these people?

We are pretty certain that the influence of Barack Obama and his acolytes is powerful in today’s White House, so who-all is lying to Joe? All of them?

Or is this what Lunchbucket Scranton Joe is really like?

https://www.americanthinker.co...e_being_lied_to.html

https://twitter.com/libertyfar.../1743671174381388141

^^. Reading the comments assures me TDS is alive and well

They probably didn’t bother telling that drooling old fool Biden because everyone knows he’s not really in charge of anything:


https://x.com/jackposobiec/sta...780867674165706?s=46

quote:

Originally posted by chellim1:
Tyler added: "The leading candidate of a major party in the United States is running for president so that he can systematically dismantle and destroy our democracy."

Their projection is really getting tiresome.

Repeat a lie often enough... Right out of the Soviet playbook.

New Mexico democrats on X are all echoing the same narrative. Saying the sixth of January was scariest day of their life.

Pathetic.
Edit: to add link.

https://pinonpost.com/nms-cons...e-january-6-theater/

.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Greymann,

I can’t see how the SecDef gets to keep his job after this, but then again we are talking about Biden the puppet so who the hell knows:


https://x.com/ByronYork/status...047350585114928?s=20

Incredible.

I guess his job is not that important. I would be missed immediately if I did not show up for work, and I have nothing to do with the defense of the United States.

First, there is no accountablility with the left. He'll apologize and all will be well.

Second, this "administration" is running nothing. You can bet that those who are actually running this country (into the ground) were well briefed on the situation.

Talk about a biased media. I know it is the Daily Beast but this is ridiculous:" On Saturday night, three years to the day after supporters of Donald Trump attacked the U.S. Capitol building, election objecting Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO) is the subject of an active police investigation into an alleged physical altercation with her ex-husband, Jayson Boebert, at a restaurant in her district Saturday night."
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Really??? Are we gonna hear this all the way to November?

quote:

Originally posted by ZSMICHAEL:
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Really??? Are we gonna hear this all the way to November?

It's January. We've just begun.