I'm horrible at this. I'm gonna end up like Homer Simpson when he gave Marge a bowling ball for Christmas, with his name engraved on it.

C'mon, old guys married for years and years- you of all people must understand. Help a brutha out.

I always lean more towards experiences than gifting items. People generally have enough stuff.

Give her a planned vacation, even if all you can afford is just a small one to a bed-and-breakfast outside your usual area.

Or take her to visit family members that she hasn't seen in a while, but has been meaning to.

Get her tickets to a concert or theatre show she wants to attend.

Heck, get her a ride in a racecar or a white water rafting package if that's her thing.

The point is to build memories with her doing things that she enjoys.


If that's not workable, at least get her something that she'll use regularly, rather than another thing that will sit on a shelf or in a drawer. This may not be a specific singular item, but could even be more of a package, something along the lines of a small remodel to upgrade the shower she uses every day into something more luxurious, or redo the shelves in the master closet that she's always complaining about, or replace the living room floor that she hates.

Iirc, she likes outdoor birds, right?

Birds, yes, and gardening.

Does she enjoy gardening? Maybe a really nice set of gardening implements and gloves.

A Spa trip.

I have no great advice. I’m lucky enough to have a wife that said, “we should just tell each other exactly what we want.

But in my previous marriage I learned to make note of things the ex wife mentioned throughout the year. If you remember things you will be successful. I was never successful just picking something on my own.

Wife is getting a new puffy jacket. I’m getting a Vickers sling and a rail for my mini 14. Seems fair.

A new suitcase, backpack, or other travel amenity with either tickets or a brochure inside with the destination.
This year my girl is getting a new Osprey backpack with a brochure to Yellowstone inside.
Last year it was ski boots with ski resort lift tickets.

My wife is an avid gardener and I picked this up from Anthropologie for her B-day...

https://www.anthropologie.com/...ne%20Size&quantity=1

The only gripe, which is slight, is that my wife & I wish the base of the legs (when unfolded) had a U-shape design that would allow the stool to conform more to slight deviations in the turf.

Several gift ideas might come from perusing this site: https://www.plowhearth.com/en/...rden-supplies/c/5690

I agree that experience-based gifts are also a good gift idea. Perhaps a gardening master-class or the same for cooking? Of course, no woman scoffs at a 1-hr massage or day spa gift certificate.

quote:

Originally posted by parabellum:
Birds, yes, and gardening.

Ah, gardening, eh? With that I can perhaps help you

My wife's greatest joy is gardening. This is one of her absolute favorite gardening tools: Japanese Weeding Sickle Very Sharp Edge Quick Work

There are multiple products on Amazon. I just clicked the first one that came up. I searched on "Japanese weeding tool" (w/o the quotes).

(ETA: Buy two, for when, while she's weeding, she sets the thing aside, realizes, later, it's missing, and has no idea where in the gardens the thing is )

A good pair of bypass hand-pruners are one of a gardener's best friends. You can't go wrong with Fiskars. Something like this: Fiskars Forged Pruner with Replaceable Blade.

I believe you can find Fiskars' products at Home Depot and Lowe's, as well?

Belay that. (Bloody amateurs!)

My wife's pruners are Felco: Felco 2 Classic Model - One-Hand Pruning Shear

Those are the Real Deal. They also make versions for left-handers, people with arthritis, etc.

(I thought those Fiskars pruners seemed awfully "economical.")

For extra added bonus: Add a clip-on leather holster for them. My wife's had hers for ever since I bought her her shears nearly thirty years ago.

My wife has this two-wheeled garden cart she uses to haul stuff around. She absolutely loves the thing. The company that made it was bought out by Scotts, who promptly discontinued the product. Somebody recently re-introduced it. When she gets back I'll find out what it is and post that, too.

ETA: And here it is: Gorilla Carts GCR-4 4 Cu. Ft, 300-pound Capacity, Poly Yard Cart, Black/Yellow.

She says it's every bit as good as the one she's been using ever since a good friend that had passed away willed her hers.

ETA: Here's another idea: 6 in. Polypropylene Handle Natural Radius Grip Aluminum Ergonomic Hand Garden Trowel in Red

Makes digging with a hand trowel much easier, with less strain on fingers and wrist.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: ensigmatic,

New binoculars for birding? A guided birdwatching tour?

How about a potting table, Something with good storage?

I was going to suggest binoculars as well if she doesn't already have a nice pair. Max magnification not usually as useful as very bright optics, unless she's gazing far off.

If you really want to go over top some image stabilizing ones would be awesome. Unfortunately also very pricey, based on my search for same. Just can't do it.

She has Vortex binoculars I gave her a few years ago.

quote:

Originally posted by RogueJSK:
I always lean more towards experiences than gifting items. People generally have enough stuff.

Give her a planned vacation, even if all you can afford is just a small one to a bed-and-breakfast outside your usual area.

Or take her to visit family members that she hasn't seen in a while, but has been meaning to.

Get her tickets to a concert or theatre show she wants to attend.

Heck, get her a ride in a racecar or a white water rafting package if that's her thing.

The point is to build memories with her doing things that she enjoys.


If that's not workable, at least get her something that she'll use regularly, rather than another thing that will sit on a shelf or in a drawer. This may not be a specific singular item, but could even be more of a package, something along the lines of a small remodel to upgrade the shower she uses every day into something more luxurious, or redo the shelves in the master closet that she's always complaining about, or replace the living room floor that she hates.

I think RogueJSK hit the nail on the head with his reply! I know we have WAY too much "stuff", and when I buy her "stuff", it ends up just sitting around or tossed in a drawer, even if she specifically asked for it. Buying something like concert tickets or tickets to the local theatre for her and a friend is MUCH more suitable for our household!

Athleta sells quality clothing, especially if she practices yoga or just works out.

quote:

Originally posted by bronicabill:
I know we have WAY too much "stuff", and when I buy her "stuff", it ends up just sitting around or tossed in a drawer, even if she specifically asked for it.

That started happening in the ensigmatic household. Particularly after it got to the point where, if we wanted or needed something, we just went out and bought it. Got to the point we were having to Make Stuff Up just to put under the tree. A few years back we decided to stop doing that.

We'll buy one, maybe a couple things for one another, just to have something to open on Christmas Day, but that's it.

This year she sent me a link to a new hand mixer with "Something for under the tree for me" in the email title. So I bought her that. (Her old hand mixer is on its last legs.)

Meanwhile, I had an order for some weight equipment on the way, one piece of which was an EZ Curl bar. When it arrived I stuck it in a far corner, out of sight, out of mind, and that will go under the tree for me.

A nice orchid plant with which she can exercise her gardening urges indoors in the winter. Perhaps accompanied by a book on Orchid care, and/or supplies, a mini-greenhouse, etc.

Some indoor gardeners really get interested in topiary/Bonsai if exotic flowers don't flex her green thumb.

For bird enthusiasts a trip, together, perhaps on the Georgia coast for bird watching? There are websites that track migrations and can be inspiring events.

For in winter, when not getting out, if the two of you like board games this one is very, very highly reviewed, and is significantly discounted for the first time I've seen them do so. Wingspan

Get her the Mercedes Benz of pruning shears, the Felco F6. Swiss made.

I wish I could help but I go through the same thing every Christmas, birthday, and anniversary. After 30 years it's kinda tough, especially when she usually buys what she wants on her own.