Smudge, I applaud your efforts to prevent your experiences from befalling your son. I hope that your efforts to retard/reverse the effects of drinking are successful. Thank you for sharing your story. Strength and peace to you and your family.
Ed, I recall being part of the discussion thread when your father was arrested in PA. I had hoped for your sake and peace of mind that things might have worked out with less pain than what you had already endured. I can't offer more than my condolences and prayers, and I do.
Knowing that both of your last words to each other were "I love you" will truly help you get to a point past any thoughts of grief and hurt. I lost my father in 1997, and those were the last words we spoke as well. I've never had any doubt or regret as I heard him say those words to me.
I hope that you have the rest of your days without the torment of the history of your relationship and remember that last conversation the most. Peace.
Posts: 157 | Location: Western PA | Registered: March 30, 2017
You're a good man, Smudge. Your sincerity and need is moving. May God bless you. My condolences to you and your family, but this was an end that had to come in order for you and yours to truly move on and get beyond the pain to just remember, and keep, the good.
You will find comfort and peace.
I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all. -Ecclesiastes 9:11
Posts: 6055 | Location: Dallas | Registered: August 04, 2011
Smudge - Such a story of sadness and pain that is repeated way too often. My parents, especially my father, were both alcoholics but not mean drunks. Once I was 18, I put distance between us, both geographically and otherwise. I didn't cry when they died and still feel sorry for 2 lives that missed their full potential. I haven't had a drink in 20 years and relish the fact that the disease passed me by. Sobriety is a gift.
I pray that your family can find peace and that you can recover from COVID. Mike
I'm sorry if I hurt you feelings when I called you stupid - I thought you already knew - Unknown ................................... When you have no future, you live in the past. " Sycamore Row" by John Grisham ................................... Liberalism is a failure to find pathways to intelligence in your brain. - David Lawrence
Posts: 3489 | Location: Montana | Registered: December 24, 2013
Yes, very sad to hear your loss. I can sympathize as my father went through similar. Never got to see his only grandchildren and lived his last days in and out of homeless shelters. There was no discussing it with him as he swore he wasn't an alcoholic yet during every wellness check they found his room full of empty wine bottles.
It is a disease that destroys the mind. To this day I am a light drinker because my father died of alcoholism and his father got drunk and passed out in a snow bank and froze to death. Guessing I don't have good genes for hard core drinking.
Hang in there and be sure to be thankful of what you have this weekend!
Posts: 1562 | Location: Chicagoland | Registered: December 10, 2008