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| I Am The Walrus |
Tell your daughter you will walk her down the aisle then call the authorities to come pick him up and send him back before the wedding?  Seriously though, if he's sincere about her and wants to legitimize being here, it's a win/win. We all know how it is to keep our mouth shut for the overall better of things rather than say what we really think/feel. _____________ | |||
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| Member |
I like the way you think!  -------------------------- Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats. -- H L Mencken I always prefer reality when I can figure out what it is. -- JALLEN 10/18/18 | |||
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Told cops where to go for over 29 years… |
40 something daughter, how old is this guy? How long has been residing here illegally? Has he done anything proactively to try and become a citizen? I see several red flags as well as other posters have. Personally, I could not endorse it. Doesn’t mean I don’t love my daughter but if my daughter loved me she wouldn’t be asking me to abandon my principles. I have an adult son who has “strayed” from his mother’s and my beliefs in a number of areas. It has strained the relationship, but he is still our son and We love him and his wife regardless. Out of respect for each other there are just certain topics we don’t discuss when we are together. What part of "...Shall not be infringed" don't you understand???  | |||
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posting without pants |
space saver for a much longer post Strive to live your life so when you wake up in the morning and your feet hit the floor, the devil says "Oh crap, he's up." | |||
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| Wandering, but not lost...I think  |
Take politics out of it...it is all about your daughter. And although she is in her 40s, she is apparently still too immature to think through emotion and consider the future. Her fiancé is an ILLEGAL ALIEN. He is only still here in this country because he has not yet been caught! So do you upset your daughter now by refusing her request? Or do you suffer to witness your daughter heartbroken, distraught, stressed, and depressed because her now-husband has been deported? If they have kids at this time, "Daddy" is now in another country. Your daughter and grandchildren have lost a source of income, legal bills are piled up, and now the legal path to citizenship is longer and more difficult than it was in October 2017. You have to get through to her NOW. Or you can stand by and watch her life be destroyed later, knowing you should have done something. | |||
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semi-reformed sailor |
I wouldn't do it. "Violence, naked force, has settled more issues in history than has any other factor.” Robert A. Heinlein “You may beat me, but you will never win.” sigmonkey-2020 “A single round of buckshot to the torso almost always results in an immediate change of behavior.” Chris Baker | |||
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Seeker of Clarity |
+1 . I would be interested to know that there's a long term plan to make that work though. I suppose he gets residency status by marriage, huh? How old is this guy?  | |||
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| Wandering, but not lost...I think |
No. Marriage to a US citizen does not grant automatic citizenship or residency. Nor does it fast-track any processes. | |||
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Member |
Wouldn't do it either, too many negative stories about illegals using citizens........Sorry to hear about a really crappy situation. | |||
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| I believe in the principle of Due Process  |
Where did you come up with that? I’m married to a non-native who became entitled to US citizenship by marrying a US citizen. There is a process, it takes time, but is relatively certain if you keep up with the process. It might take 3-5 years. You get a green card initially. Luckily, I have enough willpower to control the driving ambition that rages within me. When you had the votes, we did things your way. Now, we have the votes and you will be doing things our way. This lesson in political reality from Lyndon B. Johnson "Some things are apparent. Where government moves in, community retreats, civil society disintegrates and our ability to control our own destiny atrophies. The result is: families under siege; war in the streets; unapologetic expropriation of property; the precipitous decline of the rule of law; the rapid rise of corruption; the loss of civility and the triumph of deceit. The result is a debased, debauched culture which finds moral depravity entertaining and virtue contemptible." - Justice Janice Rogers Brown | |||
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:^) |
Not enough information to draw a conclusion on the suitor's intent. Hardworking, in what capacity? Length of engagement? Commitment? Family? Age? If all passed my criteria I would have no issue. If not, I would only follow through with request if their were pre-nuptials specific to the situation. I've seen poor relationships end in tragedy. Which could have been averted by a strong fatherly role, which the father declined... I won't elaborate... it wasn't me. If he passes your criteria, he's a strong family man and his intentions true, embrace him as a member of the family. | |||
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Tinker Sailor Soldier Pie |
Someone who is in this country illegally does not get a green card simply for marrying a citizen. For that, he will eventually need to leave the country before he can really begin the process of gaining legal residency. Furthermore, if he is here illegally by overstaying a visa, he potentially could be barred from entering the country again for a period of ten years (I believe). There is indeed a process, and the smart thing (or at least the proper thing) to do would be for this illegal to get legal status first. But again, he will need to return to his native country to begin the process. The K1 visa is the way to go forward. But of course, everyone wants the quick and easy solution. But there really isn't one. ~Alan Acta Non Verba NRA Life Member (Patron) God, Family, Guns, Country Men will fight and die to protect women... because women protect everything else. ~Andrew Klavan | |||
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Cat Whisperer |
my business partner is dealing with this now. He's from DR and is spending an enormous amount of time and money getting his citizenship (and he's married to an american) ------------------------------------ 135 ├┼┼╕ 246R | |||
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| St. Vitus Dance Instructor  |
Living in Texas I have heard similar stories and it rarely turns out any good. Guy is Prince Charming before the wedding and once the honeymoon is over tries to practice his countries way of how they treat women. We treat our dogs better here. I have also heard stories where the parents called ICE on the guy before the wedding. Hope it all works out. | |||
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| I believe in the principle of Due Process |
Nobody said it was easy. My wife says it was a complete hassle, trips to the US consulates, psperwork, etc. and that was 40 years ago. There are immigration attorneys who can guide the process and avoid missteps. Luckily, I have enough willpower to control the driving ambition that rages within me. When you had the votes, we did things your way. Now, we have the votes and you will be doing things our way. This lesson in political reality from Lyndon B. Johnson "Some things are apparent. Where government moves in, community retreats, civil society disintegrates and our ability to control our own destiny atrophies. The result is: families under siege; war in the streets; unapologetic expropriation of property; the precipitous decline of the rule of law; the rapid rise of corruption; the loss of civility and the triumph of deceit. The result is a debased, debauched culture which finds moral depravity entertaining and virtue contemptible." - Justice Janice Rogers Brown | |||
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| Wandering, but not lost...I think |
I think you mistook the context of my statement. As you said, there is a process that takes time - 3-5 years, as you pointed out - which supports my statement that marriage does not grant automatic citizenship, nor does it fast-track the process. I understand you've been through it, but many factors come into play and a great many things have changed since you married, I'm sure. I am intimately familiar with the process myself, although each case is unique. The OP's situation is probably one of the more difficult cases because of the illegal status of the fiancé. As I doubt clemency is likely post-nuptials, the best bet for the individual is to go home and apply for the K-1 (fiancé) visa ASAP. As long as he's not from a quota-restricted country, wait time will be minimal. | |||
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Age Quod Agis |
If he is a good man, I'd walk her down the aisle with a smile on my face and a song in my heart. If it was within my financial capability, I would then do all in my power to help make him a citizen. Good luck and God bless. "I vowed to myself to fight against evil more completely and more wholeheartedly than I ever did before. . . . That’s the only way to pay back part of that vast debt, to live up to and try to fulfill that tremendous obligation." Alfred Hornik, Sunday, December 2, 1945 to his family, on his continuing duty to others for surviving WW II. | |||
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| Just because you can, doesn't mean you should |
^^ I would have a serious sit down with him (without her) first and discuss the practical matters. Maybe the both of them if he passes the first test. What are the longer term plans? What happens if he gets caught first and gets deported? Would she go back to wherever he is from? How are his job prospects and marketable skills? How will they handle the money they earn? Joint accounts or separate? Will this put her in any legal jeopardy, tax implications, etc. And on and on. ___________________________ Avoid buying ChiCom/CCP products whenever possible. | |||
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Member |
If you went to his country she'd be the illegal. Would that stop you ? I don't think so ..... Be part of the solution ! | |||
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| Lucky to be Irish |
Tough call. I am, by nature, skeptical when it comes to situations like this. Clearly he has a huge motive to marry a citizen. Then again, she's well into adulthood, guess I would do as she wishes and hope for the best. | |||
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