I'm getting a little weirded out by things. Not just at the age of 48, -not at all the number really- but more, the kids moving into different stages. One off to college. The rest so much more independent. I've reached a sort of apogee for my career, but with that comes immense responsibility. 60 hours a week for the most part. And even that goes in a heartbeat, with so much left to do.

I'm a little swept away by it all really. And just now had the thought that I'm going to blink my eyes and find myself much much closer to the end.

So. To those who are far further down this line, looking back... What do you wish someone told you?? Which if you could, that you would pay very close attention to?

I'm listening.

Take care of your health.

quote:

Originally posted by ZSMICHAEL:
Take care of your health.

Well yeah... I didn't mention some chronic issues that are adding to the pile. Thank God nothing life threatening. But there's the fatiguing weight of various issues. I can't complain, and don't mean to with all that so many other deal with. But yeah. I'm trying, but having more and more difficulty maintaining my activity level through the barriers.

Hoping for some significant relief with spinal injection of steroids later this week. I've no doubt the pain and fatigue is what's driving me into this cloud of mental-yuk.

Get it while you can. What "it" is, depends on you. Once you can no longer do things, seldom will you regain the ability. Ski, fish, hunt go on vacations with your SO, go to ball games... anything you like but for some reason feel you currently don't have time for. Make the time. It will suck if you finally get the time, and no longer are up to it. Happens more often then you might think.

72 years old today. Best advice i ever got was from my father. Maintain your integrity. It is and will always be the foundation and the walls of your life.

quote:

Originally posted by Johnny 3eagles:
72 years old today. Best advice i ever got was from my father. Maintain your integrity. It is and will always be the foundation and the walls of your life.

Happy Birthday I hope you're having a good one

Narrow your focus to what is really important to you. I mean really important. It is easy to get distracted. Pulled here and there. Pick a number. I would suggest somewhere in the range of three to 5. Remember I said "Narrow". Commmit to them to see them through.

That does not mean let everything else go to pot. But somethings will go while you focus on those things that you deem most important.

I also do not mean things like God, family and country. We now those are very important. So it would be things next important.
Do some soul searching on figuring what those things are.
I think this is very important to your success and fulfillment. Obviously if married your wife should be involved or at least know what these things are.

I'm 56, have lost both parents, both in-laws, one sibling and three brothers in law since 50. I wasn't prepared for the void its left...

Man, you need to relax.

I'll be 72 in a few months. Am I getting close to the end? Well, yeah. Does it bother me? Not really. I look back on my life and have no real complaints. Oh, there are things I would do differently in retrospect but overall I am pretty happy with how it all turned out. I have a wife and daughter that love me and a six year old granddaughter that thinks I walk on water. How much more could you really ask out of a life?

I had to look up apogee.

60 hours a week and the job becomes your life and you will regret it later in life unless you own the business.

I did that for about ten years when I was younger and had less responsibilities and I was so used to it that I didn't realize how much I was missing out on until I got a different job that didn't require it.

I am not that much older than you I am 53.
At the age of 33 I was burnt out. I was working what seemed like 2 careers at the same time. I worked 7 days a week during certain times of the year and during the week it was from 8 in the morning till 11 at night.
I thought, is this how the rest of my life was going to go.
I spent most of the year wishing it away so I could get to my yearly vacation in Florida. This was the only time my wife and I spend any real time together. I watched the years fly by doing this.
At this point I thought my life sucked even though I loved my work. I though am I going to wake up one day at the age of 65,divorced, alone and think what have I accomplished in my life. It makes you think.
We had no kids, owned a house in an expensive part of New Jersey "Well the bank owned it and we were paying a mortgage".
I am telling you this because this is what I did. I will not work for every one.
First thing, cherish what you have in your life that is most important to you. For me it is my wife that is and still what is most important.
Second, I gave up everything and everyone I knew in New Jersey including 2 very well paying careers and moved to Florida. This saved my marriage.
Third, spend time on yourself with your family doing the thing you love. I never heard anyone say on their death bed "I should have spent more time at work".
Fourth, take care of your health as much as possible. My wife and I lost a lot of weight years ago so as we got older we would be as healthy as possible and still be able to be as active as possible.
By moving to Florida it gave my wife and I a chance to start over. The cost of living in Florid was so much less than New Jersey we did not have to work as many hours/jobs as we did up north. We actually ended up saving more money for retirement living in Florida then New Jersey.
This is extreme and most people can't just up and start over again like we did.
It dose not sound like this is your situation but you asked so I am telling you what I did.
Sometimes you have to find a way to slow your life down. You have concentrate on who and what is most important in your life and enjoy them/it.

quote:

What do you wish someone told you?? Which if you could, that you would pay very close attention to?

Nearly 50 years ago I had moved to a new state, a new job, with new babies and a marriage that wasn't working out.

In a small community mom n' pop corner grocery I had taken to frequently picking up small items a few times a week, mainly due to the pleasant operators, one Friday evening the 3 main aisles were full of freight & many unopened boxes to restock.

'Pop' was smiling and humming to himself as he labored, and suddenly took off his apron preparing to close up. I was surprised, asking about his unfinished work.....

He smiled and I swear a beatific light surrounded his head momentarily....He told me that "todays' work IS done....what's left is tomorrow's work".....

Thanks again 'Pop' I got the message.....

Time goes faster as you get older.

Do this, take a tape measure extend it and lay it out on the ground gesstimate in inches how long you will live. then take a look in inches how old you are now. that will be an eye opener

Do everything now don't wait for that some day. I'm 58 and it fly's by the daughter left for collage and that was quite a surprise just how quite things get.


If im lucky, I will make it to 80 thats 22 years my daughter is 21 and it seems like yesterday we were bringing her home.

quote:

Originally posted by ZSMICHAEL:
Take care of your health.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Cannot be overstated. Do what you love that is physical now, while all your body parts work. They slowly fall apart even if you take care. Great thread and love everyone else's perspective as well.

take care of your health and spend time with the people you care about. don't put things off until tomorrow. Tomorrow may not look at all like you think.

With me, it has always been important to have something to look forward to. Whether it is a vacation, package arriving, dinner on Friday night, just something.

There is some good advice here. Especially around health. If your out of shape or heavy, it’s easier for you to lose weight now than later.diet is very important. Cut your sugar intake, drink more water and reduce your protein from beef products. I’ve witnessed guys lose as much as 50lbs in a year just by following these steps and walking a few miles a day. Got them off their blood pressure meds and nexium too! Now that the kids are moving on, find a mutual activity for you and the wife. Wether it be bowling or dancing or even cooking classes, you get to date her all over again!

Thank you everyone for your replies and advice. Great stuff! The idea of moving to Florida is Sooo appealing after 4 months of winter. Talk about wishing your time away!

quote:

Originally posted by Johnny 3eagles:
72 years old today. Best advice i ever got was from my father. Maintain your integrity. It is and will always be the foundation and the walls of your life.

Happy Birthday! Dad had some damn good advice there. I once heard it said -something like-, you only have integrity once.