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Member |
Gentlemen, for those of you that have lost your wife, do you continue to wear your wedding band? Up until today, I swore that I would not remove mine until I am cremated. I want to honor her and our marriage by keeping it on my left hand. Some people suggest moving it to the right hand. My sister, who is a widow, told me to take the ring off if I want to date again. I do, because I cannot deal with the loneliness. Another suggestion that came up is to wear a black band to indicate that I am a widower. Your thoughts on this, please. Thanks, Mike | ||
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אַרְיֵה |
Mike, I don't have the right words to tell you how sorry I am for your loss. As far as the ring, I would say don't worry about any "rules" -- just do what feels right to you. הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים | |||
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| Member |
Thanks, LR I took your advice on the therapist. I am grateful.
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| When you fall, I will be there to catch you -With love, the floor |
Yes I do. | |||
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Ammoholic |
I would probably have it made into something else, like a pendant or different style ring. If you plan on dating in the future, your sister is right. I'm sorry for your loss. Jesse Sic Semper Tyrannis | |||
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Member |
You're sister may be right, would your wife want you alone and unhappy? God sometimes sends messages in strange ways. | |||
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| No ethanol! |
I am truly sorry for your loss, I get it. You can wear it for as long as it helps you mourn. In the small amount of the dating world I have seen, wearing it while you search is often taken as a sign that you are not ready to move on. Probably counterproductive. ------------------ The plural of anecdote is not data. -Frank Kotsonis | |||
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| Member |
Many of us don't know the significance of a black band. | |||
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"Member" |
In the strange and confusing way that women work, I would think wearing your wedding ring would attract women. As well as send the message that you are capable of commitment. | |||
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| Green grass and high tides  |
I lost my wedding band probably 25 years ago. Have not wore a ring of any sort since. Honestly do not think a thing would of changed since I lost it. Does not bother my wife at all. Fwiw "Practice like you want to play in the game" | |||
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Member |
I'm going to lean on the presumptuous side. I'm not a widower. Married life is filled with many memories. That is what my wife and I value. We don't even take pictures (rarely at best). We wear wedding bands every day but it's not really something we consider important. If one of us were to die, the decision to wear the band or not wouldn't matter to either of us. Again, it's the memories we cherish and that doesn't change regardless of the band. That being said, I would continue to wear the band every day. I would remove it only if/when I became committed to someone else. Anybody who would take issue before that is probably not someone with whom I'd want to be. Same is true of anybody who would avoid me if I'm wearing the band. I would ignore everything else and just do what feels right to you. Whatever happens will be meant to be. Don't change who you are. It's what your wife loved about you. I believe that anybody worthwhile, band or not, will see it too. This is my opinion. "Wrong does not cease to be wrong because the majority share in it." L.Tolstoy "A government is just a body of people, usually, notably, ungoverned." Shepherd Book | |||
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| אַרְיֵה |
Agreed, 100% הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים | |||
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| Member |
Your opinion means a lot to me. Thank you.
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| Member |
I thought the same thing. Then my sister suggested it. Cops wear black tape over their badges.
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| Member |
She would not. She was a sport, always the funniest person in the room.
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| Member |
Thank you.
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Casuistic Thinker and Daoist |
Women who see you while you are wearing a wedding band would assume that you are married, that would mean they believe that they are approaching a married man. Women who are looking for a committed relationship would avoid approaching a man wearing a wedding band No, Daoism isn't a religion | |||
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| Member |
Thank you.
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| Member |
Yep. That already happened recently. I passed 3 women in a restaurant. One of them said “damn, he’s married.”
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| Member |
Wear it if you want to. Any woman worth her salt would be impressed by such devotion this day and time. It’s a rare trait. Having said that, I have never worn a ring of any kind. Saw my grandfather loose his ring finger because of a wedding ring. I’ve always done construction work so rings were out. | |||
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