My wife. I love her dearly.

But I should have learned, by now, not to expect a straightforward answer to a simple question.

In the kitchen, poking around, and I ask, “Would you like some <whatever>?”

There are only two logical answers to this question:

1. ”Yes, please,” or
   
   
2. ”No, thank you.”

”Is there any?” is not the right response. Why would I offer you some, if there isn’t any?

Forty years of marriage, preceded by five years of togetherness, and I still have not learned.

I guess there are worse things, I just felt like complaining here.

I feel your pain.

Every now and then I just say to my wife, "can you answer the question I asked?". Then she spends a day not talking to me.

Yes, you think I would learn too.

Here's your answer.



Jim

quote:

Originally posted by P-220:
I feel your pain.

Every now and then I just say to my wife, "can you answer the question I asked?". Then she spends a day not talking to me.

Yes, you think I would learn too.

Worse response - ever!

And yes, I know.

quote:

Originally posted by V-Tail:

”Is there any?”

Reminds me of somebody I know! In my case, her answer usually doesn't address the question, so I'm still in the dark as to what she wants.

Some years ago, I read an article about women in the clandestine services claiming they were better at reading their opponent than men would be. To me, it makes perfect sense, because the men were all thinking "Just let me kill the Bitch and get it over with!"

I still haven’t learned.
We go to a drive through. If there’s a line I read the menu and decide what to order. Otherwise I pretty much get the same thing as last time. That done, I ask my wife what she wants, her answer is always “I don’t know. I want to read the menu.” (She can see the menu but wants to get to the order screen before she decides anything.) She already knows what’s on the menu and what she usually gets.
After 47 years I should learn.

44 years of trying here. I carefully state my question so that it can only be answered yes or no. I get a 5 min. answer and I still don't know if it was a yes or no. Sometimes, just to make life interesting, I'll ask; was that a yes or a no. Boy life gets interesting real quick!
Rod

Sigh.

This is what's known as a lose-lose situation.

If you accept the non-answer and guess wrong as to whether it was a "yes" or a "no", you're in trouble.

If you play 40 Questions trying to determine whether it was a "yes" or a "no", you're an asshole.

After 44 years, I've never found a solution and have given up trying.

V-Tail, I feel your pain albeit in my case the answer is always: "maybe"

It is up to me to divine SWMBO desires. Although there is a 50/50 chance of being correct, I have a success rate far lower.

Just yesterday:

Wife - I'd like to go out on the boat
Me - When would you like to go?
Wife - When would you like to go?
Me - I didn't say I wanted to take the boat out.
Wife - Why didn't you just say you don't want to take the boat out?
Me - I didn't say I didn't want to take the boat out, I was just trying to find out when you wanted to go?
Wife - Do you want to take tbe boat out?
Me - Sure, I want to take the boat out. When do you want to go?
Wife - When do you want to go?
Me - Ten minutes ago.

I swear, I'd rename the boat Itza Trapp except it would sound goofy over the radio. Mayday, Itza Trapp.

Only 13 years. From what I'm gathering, it's not going to get any better.

quote:

Originally posted by trapper189:
Just yesterday:

Wife - I'd like to go out on the boat
Me - When would you like to go?
Wife - When would you like to go?
Me - I didn't say I wanted to take the boat out.
Wife - Why didn't you just say you don't want to take the boat out?
Me - I didn't say I didn't want to take the boat out, I was just trying to find out when you wanted to go?
Wife - Do you want to take tbe boat out?
Me - Sure, I want to take the boat out. When do you want to go?
Wife - When do you want to go?
Me - Ten minutes ago.

I swear, I'd rename the boat Itza Trapp except it would sound goofy over the radio. Mayday, Itza Trapp.

Only 13 years. From what I'm gathering, it's not going to get any better.

LOLOLOLOLOL I've run into this with girlfriends over the years...….then if you say you want to go at 10am......they say they don't want to go at 10, they want to go later......then you say 12.....then they say well that's a little too late.....LOLOLOLOL

+1, and add in English as a second language. 45 years, same ting.

There was a thread in The Lounge about kidney stones. One post mentioned that an ingredient (potassium citrate) in Crystal Light lemonade was frequently prescribed as a kidney stone preventive med. SWMBO has had a couple of kidney stones, so when I read that, I mixed up a half-gallon jug of Crystal Light lemonade, then I stuck my head into the room where she was doing some paperwork.

The dialog:

Me: "Hey, do you want a glass of Crystal Light?"

Her: "Is there any?"

Beat reality rant post yet!
Been doing this for 40 years now!

There was a woman on death row. When the warden asked her what she wanted for her last meal, she replied: "Oh, I don't know. What were you thinking about"?

True story.

Too true, even after 43 years! Read these to the wife and we both laughed until we had tears in our eyes. Even then, my comment to her that I had some funny anecdotes I wanted to read to her about men and women married 40+ years and how they communicate elicited the response, “Are you having trouble communicating with me?”

Like the WOPR said: the only way to win is not to play.

quote:

Originally posted by Jim Shugart:
There was a woman on death row. When the warden asked her what she wanted for her last meal, she replied: "Oh, I don't know. What were you thinking about"?

True story.

This is my favorite conversation. What do you want for dinner? It turns into a 20 discussion. She'll ask where I want to go and then shoot down every answer I give her and pick something else. I ask her why she even asked me if she knew what she wanted and bam, I'm the bad guy.

There's also a similar game we play where she tells me I have to pick since she picked last time. Again she shoots down every answer i give and picks something totally different. This also turns into me getting in trouble.

Great thread V! I have a very unique situation of foreign born logic to deal with. My wife is Russian, and a very stubborn one at that I've come to find out. Talk about hard to try and get answers to an otherwise simple everyday questions.

I usually end up changing the subject because the answer to my question has to go thru her foreign filters and then her replies may or may not have anything to do with what I asked. I'll avoid trying to put the conversation back on track for the answer but, by then it's clear that she really had no intentions of answering the question.

I once asked her if she was KGB trained in the past to never give a correct answer, only let them hear whatever they need to hear

When I don’t get a yes or no response I just stare at her until she responds appropriately or goes away.

I find the humor in the part where you think that sooner or later you'll learn.

It is like their super power, they keep sucking us into the same trap over and over.