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paradox in a box |
My 22 year old has one semester left of college. My 19 year old is done with school and working full time. Since my oldest’s last semester only requires 2 classes he’s no longer full time. I let the ex know my last payment would be this Friday. She freaked out, clearly not realizing my oldest is emancipated if not full time. She was pissed at only 4 day’s notice. I didn’t want her to ruin Christmas by making a stink with the kids so I waited until after to tell her. Anyhow she made some ridiculous threats such as adding classes and then saying he was going to drop out. Crazy shit considering if he dropped out she wouldn’t get paid either. Anyhow I told her I’d pay through January to help her out. She was good with that, thank god. She admitted the younger one is emancipated, which is good because the agreement has some ambiguous language. So come February I will gain $1600 more a month. Putting it right toward paying off the house. These go to eleven. | ||
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Told cops where to go for over 29 years… |
“Child” support should end once the “child” becomes an adult. Just another way the colleges fleece folks into outrageous costs for degrees with questionable value. No legal obligation for parents to provide college educational if parents remain married, however they separate and all of a sudden some court can mandate that obligation on behalf of another adult. The fact your ex is miffed just proves the point that the support was not all going to your kids. What part of "...Shall not be infringed" don't you understand???  | |||
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| Member |
Congrats! I only had one son to pay child support. But I still bought him everything he needed or wanted. Every other weekend picked him up on friday night and took him home on Sunday night. He's 44 now and has a million dollar home. I couldn't be more proud of him. | |||
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For real? |
Was that the agreement for college? Mine was child support ends at the 18th birthday but I was still responsible for medical coverage till age 26. When my oldest turned 18, we had to contact the gov't to make them stop collecting. It was a hassle. My youngest just turned 16 and my ex said she tried to stop child support but it was too much of a hassle so she just changed her child support direct deposit to our joint account (yes, we still have a joint checking account 9 years after we divorced). So I told my son he can have it to help pay for a car. When my daughter turned 18, I just gave her the money to help pay for her car. I didn't complain too much about child support, when we divorced she asked for $200 per child, no alimony and she signed off on my pension. I didn't argue and signed off on that. Now she makes way more than me. lol Not minority enough! | |||
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| paradox in a box |
The support is separate from college. In Massachusetts it’s calculated based on income. I was required to pay up to age 23 if still in full time college. Up to 21 if not full time employed. Also required to pay for half of college but that was based on ability and could take child support into account. I paid half. Just a state college so only about $6K/year. These go to eleven. | |||
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Member |
Congratulations! Go buy yourself something you deserve like a new firearm before you start hammering the mortgage. After all that, you fucking deserve it! You should just walk into the LGS and yell “no more child support!” I bet every LGS employee would be tackling each other to help you out. What am I doing? I'm talking to an empty telephone | |||
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| Green grass and high tides  |
Lol, Congrats. That is a chuck of $. Use it wisely and put it work for you. Think about splitting it up a bit maybe. "Practice like you want to play in the game" | |||
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| Member |
I share in your excitement. Mine ends in June on his 18th birthday. It means about 1200 more a month in my pocket. I totally understand that helping your kids out financially never really ends though. I'm just excited that the ex is no longer the custodian of the child support. I've seen her extravagant purchases over the years, undoubtedly with the child support payment. | |||
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| paradox in a box |
I'm in very good stable financial shape, thanks to my wife. Our next goal is the mortgage so we can retire. That's the most exciting part of this, a huge step toward retirement. These go to eleven. | |||
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| "The deals you miss don’t hurt you”-B.D. Raney Sr. |
Congratulations. I never paid “child support”, kids are expensive enough as is. Funny how our courts work…I wound up with custody, she had standard visitation. But I never received any child support, either. Regardless, enjoy your pay raise. Although I know from experience, you never finish spending money on your kids. | |||
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| Just because something is legal to do doesn't mean it is the smart thing to do. |
In Michigan we have an agency called Friend of the Court that handles court ordered child support. If you have a similar agency I would suggest you check in with them before cutting off payments just as a CYA thing. In Michigan many men refer to the agency as Friend of the C_nT. And congrats on making through the ordeal! Been there, done that. Integrity is doing the right thing, even when nobody is looking. | |||
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| paradox in a box |
In MA once emancipated I just stop payment. My payments are direct deposited by me/my paycheck. There are some folks that have the money taken by the Massachusetts Department of Revenue. They have to go through a process to get it stopped. In any case, I have in writing from the ex that both kids are emancipated per our agreement. I also spoke to a lawyer about it beforehand to make sure I was good to go. These go to eleven. | |||
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| Non-Miscreant |
This. I've only been married for 52 1/2 years . Same wife. "Kids are 51 and 47". I still help them with all kinds of things. They aren't really "my" kids, they're their own people. But we did visit both on Christmas day. I threw a dinner for them and their kids last week. My wife and I get by with under $100 for what we think of as a fancy dinner. Last week cost $650. I hope they learn from it. Grand kids took great interest in the check. Kind of a Christmas present from grandpa. Courts aren't really fair about child support. Make that offspring support. Ex wives get off pretty good. Maybe they should have to go out on the street and work for the judge as a hooker until they earn an amount equal to what they're getting from the ex hubby. Unhappy ammo seeker | |||
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| paradox in a box |
The unfortunate thing is my wife has done a good job alienating my kids from me. I barely see them, though we don't have a bad relationship. They don't ask me for anything really. I think they know their Mom will spring for ridiculous purchases and I will be much more conservative on spending. In any case if they come to me for things and it helps me get a closer relationship with them, it will be worth it. I sense that won't happen until they are out of her house. These go to eleven. | |||
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Member |
I'm no lawyer, but I would certainly send an "official" notice in writing 30 days in advance as this would seem to be prudent/common sense to cover your butt if some legal action were to take place down the road. Four days notice, I think anyone regardless of the situation would be pissed off. ---------- “Nobody can ever take your integrity away from you. Only you can give up your integrity.” H. Norman Schwarzkopf | |||
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| Member |
Always a good feeling when you stop writing that check or have it taken out of payroll. I got full custody of my daughter when she was 14 and the payments stopped. I did not pursue child support from her mother as I make good money. I did however have a court order that she would carry her on her insurance until she was 18. I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I'm not. | |||
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| paradox in a box |
4 days notice was ignorance of the agreement language on her part. As I noted I have offered her an additional month to help her out. I have all this in text. Also I went to a lawyer on how to handle this prior to sending her the note. So it’s all good now. These go to eleven. | |||
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| Leatherneck |
Congratulations! Mine ends the day they turn 18, but both will still be in high school when they turn 18 so I already told my ex I’d pay until the end of their Sr. year. I plan on giving the money to them while they are in college though so I have 6+ years on one kid and 8+ on the other. Alimony stops after their Sr. year too though, that one I’m excited for. “Everybody wants a Sig in the sheets but a Glock on the streets.” -bionic218 04-02-2014 | |||
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| Live long and prosper  |
Any generic legal wisdom you guys can offer when things are really ugly? Should no longer pay for any support and got two sons and their mother living on my property. They do not comply with legal reasons for support (age, studies, work). 0-0 "OP is a troll" - Flashlightboy, 12/18/20 | |||
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| Member |
That sounds bad and about the only advice/partial wisdom I can offer is that you'll need to consult with an actual lawyer. Very sorry. I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I'm not. | |||
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