Four jokes

September 24, 2018, 09:17 PM

Pipe Smoker

Four jokes

I read that 4,153,237 people got married last year... Not to cause any trouble, but shouldn't that be an even number?

When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body... Men are so polite they only look at the covered parts.

The pharmacist asked me my birth date again today. I’m pretty sure she’s planning to get me something.

The reason Mayberry was so peaceful and quiet may have been because nobody was married. Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam, Earnest T Bass, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara and, of course, Opie were all single. The only married person was Otis, and he stayed drunk.

September 24, 2018, 09:40 PM

vthoky

September 24, 2018, 10:37 PM

sig239dlehr

Good ones! The third one hits home as my daughter is a pharmacist!

September 25, 2018, 07:02 AM

Floyd D. Barber

quote:
Originally posted by Pipe Smoker:
I read that 4,153,237 people got married last year... Not to cause any trouble, but shouldn't that be an even number?

When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body... Men are so polite they only look at the covered parts.

The pharmacist asked me my birth date again today. I’m pretty sure she’s planning to get me something.

The reason Mayberry was so peaceful and quiet may have been because nobody was married. Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam, Earnest T Bass, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara and, of course, Opie were all single. The only married person was Otis, and he stayed drunk.

Not to cause any trouble, but shouldn't that be an even number?

Maybe someone got married twice.

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Always remember that others may hate you but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself.
Richard M Nixon

It's nice to be important, it's more important to be nice.
Billy Joe Shaver

NRA Life Member

September 25, 2018, 11:04 AM

Expert308

quote:
I read that 4,153,237 people got married last year... Not to cause any trouble, but shouldn't that be an even number?

Well, there was a story last year about some wacky woman in Seattle wanting to marry a building...

September 25, 2018, 12:10 PM

Aquabird

quote:
Originally posted by Expert308:
quote:
I read that 4,153,237 people got married last year... Not to cause any trouble, but shouldn't that be an even number?

Well, there was a story last year about some wacky woman in Seattle wanting to marry a building...

Well maybe everyone in that building was sleeping with her?

September 25, 2018, 03:54 PM

ffips

quote:
Originally posted by sig239dlehr:
Good ones! The third one hits home as my daughter is a pharmacist!

After being asked my birthday 4 times in the last hour by the Urgent Care staff, I asked them what they were getting me for my birthday.

"We're just making sure who you are."

Well, ya don't say. :rolleyes