Bear spray is not bear repellent. Please don't apply it with the same principle as mosquito repellent.

- Your Alaskan ER staff

HAHAHA!

I heard that if you apply it around your eyes it will improve your ability to see bears...any truth to that?

I didn’t quite laugh out loud, but close.

You place some on your upper lip, which then will clean out your nasal passage. This will allow unrestricted air flow to your lungs, thus allowing you to outrun the bear.

The hard part is chasing down the bear to spray him!

Most products come with instructions. POINT can away from face towards bear. You know like a Claymore: FRONT face towards ENEMY. I guess REAL men don't need instructions.

Bells.

quote:

Originally posted by sns3guppy:
Bells.

Oh yes, don’t forget the bells for the bear; big ones that’ll kill him when he tries to pass them.

quote:

Originally posted by ptruck:

allowing you to outrun the bear.

You don't need to outrun the bear. You just need to outrun the person who is with you.

In Alaska grizzly bear poop smells like bear spray and has silver bells in it.

Also, do not shampoo your hair with barbecue sauce, at least in bear country. Very important.

I don't see a problem. Let stupid be stupid. We all can get some entertainment out of it.

well, some folks just self-deselect from the gene pool. And that's a good thing.

And be sure your bear gun has a good melt job. No sharp edges. That way it won't hurt as much when the bear shoves it up your ass.

quote:

Originally posted by 2000Z-71:
Bear spray is not bear repellent. Please don't apply it with the same principle as mosquito repellent.

- Your Alaskan ER staff

I literally spit sweet tea all over the monitor. LMAO!!

quote:

Originally posted by bubbatime:

quote:

Originally posted by 2000Z-71:
Bear spray is not bear repellent. Please don't apply it with the same principle as mosquito repellent.

- Your Alaskan ER staff

I literally spit sweet tea all over the monitor. LMAO!!

Thank goodness I set my drink down prior to reading that.

To increase your odds of obtaining up close bear photos, an insider’s tip is to drive straight to PetSmart immediately after your plane lands in Anchorage. Go to the dog section and buy their largest bottle of salmon oil. Once you arrive at the trailhead for hiking, slather yourself down with salmon oil. Hike down to the river and wait for your inevitable photo op. 60% of the time, it works every time

This story reminds me of a similar story my brother and I like to laugh about.

Years ago we went on an ATV camping trip along with two brothers that were friends of ours. Although it was Summer time our camp site was @ 8500' and it got below freezing our first night.

Right around sun down, as the heat of the day gave way to cool evening temps the mosquitoes came out in force.

The two brothers we were riding/ camping with broke out their brand new can of mosquito repellent...and only mere moments later both reported that they had lost most feeling in their lips and what remained was nothing more than a tingling sensation...

...I grabbed the can from them and pointed out the directions in which it plainly stated don't spray on your face or other sensitive skin.

Although some believe that such actions should result in an automatic revocation of your "man card" I'm a firm believer in RTFD.


2000Z-71 thanks for the laugh!