“Thoughts?”
Do your own thinking, bub. I’m not going to confirm your own bias/choice/decision/whatever.

"Reach out".

I'm not an addict and you're not a counselor so don't be using that fake compassionate bullshit in the corporate world. Just say "I'll call/email/whatever-the-fuck later."

“Let’s unpack this.” No. Let’s not. Why don’t you stop using buzzwords and tell us why you called the meeting.

I’m also sick and tired of any acronyms. Usually, once you understand what the acronym stands for, you realize the speaker saved one, maybe two syllables of speech. But, you sounded cool, right up until you had to spend five minutes explaining the meaning of the acronym.

I heard “fork lift” used as a verb a few weeks back on a sales pitch call. That drained all of my interest out of me hearing that. And “leverage”. You can leverage your existing data blah, blah, blah.

“Onboarding” for newly hired employees.
“Reach out” to so and so.
“Tear down the silos”, ie, destroy fully functioning departments in a company to increase “collaboration”.
Barf.

Set the table. What's the tick tock on how it went down? He's over his skis. Game changer.

Apparently nobody is ever mad, angry, outraged, frightened, worried or scared about anything. They all “have concerns.”

I still remember sitting in a Monday morning meeting reviewing receivables. I mentioned that customer A wasn’t making final payment until we resolved his problem with the hardware.

I was quickly informed the customer didn’t have a “problem”, he had an “issue”. Ya, well call it what you will, he believes it’s a “problem” and isn’t paying until we fix it!

Any sentence with “leverage” or “synergies”

People pay money for this:
Be proactive
Begin with the end in mind
Put first things first
Think win/win
Seek to understand first, before making yourself understood
Learn to synergize
Sharpen the saw

It's also taught in the local public schools starting in kindergarten and one of several reasons we only made it two months in public school. My at the time 5yo son came home singing to the tune of Frere Jacques:

Be proactive, be proactive
Work and play, work and play...

Is the juice worth the squeeze?

Begs the question.

I was still trying to get past 'doing more with less', then I guess things got too 'nuanced' for me...

Few phrases bother me more than when someone utters "my bad" instead of declaring "I'm sorry, my mistake".

"In these unprecedented times".

Hey loser - every second of your pathetic life is unprecedented.

Let’s put this in the parking lot and move on to the next issue….

quote:

Originally posted by aileron:
Build your own bullshit phrase generator >>

https://www.atrixnet.com/bs-generator.html

I finally know where to go to sound smart.

I have seen people having "comms" a lot lately... like they have a guy running around with a big radio beside them to radio HQ.

"Let's put it out on the stoop and see if the cat licks it up"



OK - that's from the movie 12 Angry Men but I'd rather hear that than some of the idiotic nonsense I'm subjected to daily.