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The earliest published version appeared in 1902 in the Princeton Tiger written by Prof. Dayton Voorhees:

There once was a man from Nantucket
Who kept all his cash in a bucket.
But his daughter, named Nan,
Ran away with a man
And as for the bucket, Nantucket.

Expect nothing less than a ribald retort SF!

This one, I composed for a friend of mine, in honor of a surprise he received.

There once was a man named Al
Whom I considered my pal.
He went on a date
And found out too late
That his girlfriend wasn't a gal.

There was a young man from Kent
Whose tool was so long that it bent.
To save himself trouble
He put it in double
And instead of coming, he went.

A pretty young Miss from St. Paul
wore a newspaper dress to a ball
The dress caught on fire
and burned her entire

front page, sporting section and all.

There once was a man from Racine
Who invented an automatic screwing machine
Concave or convex, it would take either sex
But oh what a bastard to clean.

In Grangemouth there's an oil refinery,
A port, a canal, and a winery.
And to thrill you to bits
All the girls have 10 tits
That is if you count them in binary.

Gunfighter Joe; An Epic Limerick

There was once a gunfighter named Joe
Who’s hands were decidedly slow
Still Joe was not worried
As quickly he hurried
To a spot, pre planned by the door

His opponent called Panhandle Jack
At Joe’s challenge was taken aback
“Face me?” Jack cried
“Why with speed on my side,
You’re twice dead ‘for your hammer’s pulled back

Well Joes played his cards
They were stacked
And this was one more as nineteen before
Joe challenged, and faced, then, Crack!
And Jack hit the ground
Hearing only the sound
‘Cuz Joe faced not Jack’s front
But Jack’s back.
- TMats

There was a young lady from Dallas
Who used a dynamite stick for a phallus
They found her vagina in North Caroline
And her arsehole in Buckingham Palace

On the chest of a barmaid named Gail
Was tattooed all the prices of ale
While on her behind
For the sake of the blind
Was precisely the same but in braille.


A pirate the story relates
Loved to go dancing on skates
Then he fell on his cutlass
Which rendered him nutless
And virtually useless on dates.

The Reverend Henry Ward Beecher
Called a hen a "most elegant creature".
The hen, pleased with that,
Laid an egg in his hat.
And thus did the hen reward Beecher.

(there are clean limericks)

flashguy

A lesbian trucker named "Mike"
Drove dildos at night down the pike.
When asked by the fuzz
What it was that she does,
She replied "I'm a fake-dick van dyke".

There once was a cabbie from Cyer.
Who drove through a pole while for hire.
He had the desire,
To touch a live wire,
And any last line will do here.

While Titian was mixing his madder,
His model was posed on a ladder.
Her position, to Titian,
Suggested coition,
So he climbed up the ladder and had her.

A mathematician named Hall,
Has a hexahedronical ball,
The cube of its weight
Times his pecker length, plus eight
Is his phone number -- give him a call..

There once was a boy in my class, his balls were made out of glass, they jingled together played stormy weather and lightening shot out of his ass.

There once was a man named McNair
Who was doing his wife on the stair
When the bannister broke
He doubled his stroke
And finished her off in midair

From one of my all-time favorite movies...

There was a young lady from Niger,
Who smiled as she rode on a tiger.
They came back from the ride
With the lady inside,
And the smile on the face of the tiger.

Sorry, I'm late,

There are many good reasons for drinking,
One just entered my head.
If a man can't drink when he is living,
How can he drink when he is dead?

I really had to search for limericks that are suitable for most audiences and do not cause sixth grade boys to giggle guiltily.

I found a few.

There was a young lady named Bright
who traveled much faster than light.
She set out one day
in a relative way,
and came back the previous night.

A mosquito cried out in pain:
"A chemist has poisoned my brain!"
The cause of his sorrow
was para-dichloro-
diphenyl-trichloroethane.

There’s no seeing eye to eye
with the awesomely huge Hippopotami:
on the bank, you’re much taller;
going under, you’re smaller
and assuredly destined to die!

Of all the fishes in the sea
I'd like to be a bass
I'd climb up on a slippery rock
And slide down on my ... fins


Of all the birds I'd like to be
I'd like to a duck
I'd walk along the sandy shores
And watch the people ... swim