SIGforum.com    Main Page  Hop To Forum Categories  The Lounge    My idea to save America
Page 1 2 
Go
New
Find
Notify
Tools
Reply
  
My idea to save America Login/Join 
Peace through
superior firepower
Picture of parabellum
posted
Forget the comet. It just hit me. Err, that is to say- an idea hit me, not the comet.

Anyhoo here's what needs to happen. Everyone in the US needs to believe that they're in a Marx Brothers musical.

Everybody's havin' a good time, everyone has a part, everyone knows their lines. We're all workin' together. Why, there's cooperation and teamwork in the chaos of the most frenetic scenes.

There's a plot, but nothing- nothing at all is taken seriously and Groucho makes us laugh.

Here's how it will work- Virtual reality helmets will be mailed to all Americans. When they put on these helmets- which cover their head 360 degrees- a mild hallucinogenic gas will be released into the helmet, and then the movie will begin- Animal Crackers, made in 1930. The helmet will provide a fully-immersed VR experience, with high resolution VR goggles and 5 channel surround sound. The ultimate effect after an hour or so of this will be that the person will believe that they are a character in Marx Brothers film, and they will remain in this altered state of mind for an extended period of time- 15 or 16 years, somethin' like that.

Of course there are some kinks to be worked out, not the least of which is the financing and manufacture of 350 million or so VR helmets. Getting everyone to put on their helmet- you know that there will be stragglers.

Getting FDA approval on ummm acid light- hoo boy that's gonna be a bitch.

We'll have to close the borders, of course, cease all international flights. The rest of the world will think we're crazy.

So, what do you think? My idea is no crazier than the New Green Deal or most of the stuff coming from the left side of this nation. Mine just has a greasepaint moustache, that's all.

 
Posts: 107567 | Registered: January 20, 2000Reply With QuoteReport This Post
No Compromise
posted Hide Post
That's just crazy enough to work!

I still think we need the comet, though. Maybe after Groucho's performance, the helmets can simulate a comet strike?

H&K-Guy
 
Posts: 3720 | Registered: April 08, 2002Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Optimistic Cynic
Picture of architect
posted Hide Post
How do we know when the movie is over? Or when the hallucinogen wears off?

Ohhh, I guess that's the point.
 
Posts: 6469 | Location: NoVA | Registered: July 22, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
"Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana".
Groucho Marx.


End of Earth: 2 Miles
Upper Peninsula: 4 Miles
 
Posts: 16087 | Location: Marquette MI | Registered: July 08, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
Everybody can't handle a utopia. At least not in your own version of the matrix.

But I'd give it a try.
 
Posts: 1754 | Location: Central Florida | Registered: August 08, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
The Constable
posted Hide Post
Hooray for Captain Spaulding!
 
Posts: 7074 | Location: Craig, MT | Registered: December 17, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of IntrepidTraveler
posted Hide Post
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read."

- also Groucho Marx




Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.
- Dave Barry

"Never go through life saying 'I should have'..." - quote from the 9/11 Boatlift Story (thanks, sdy for posting it)
 
Posts: 3299 | Location: Carlsbad NM/ Augusta GA | Registered: July 15, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Do---or do not.
There is no try.
posted Hide Post
Can’t we just stuff everybody into Groucho’s stateroom from A Night at the Opera?
 
Posts: 4498 | Registered: January 01, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Something wild
is loose
Picture of Doc H.
posted Hide Post
Atsa no good. You gotta have a Sanity Clause.



"And gentlemen in England now abed, shall think themselves accursed they were not here, and hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks that fought with us upon Saint Crispin's Day"
 
Posts: 2746 | Location: The Shire | Registered: October 22, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
bobbin' and weavin
posted Hide Post
Sounds like a heck of a lot more fun than what's going on just now.....or a planet ending comet. I'm in.
 
Posts: 934 | Location: Kentucky | Registered: October 12, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of just1tym
posted Hide Post
Whenever they're manufactured, offer a Karma on a couple...I'm in for one!


Regards, Will G.
 
Posts: 9660 | Location: 140 mi to Margaritaville, FL | Registered: January 02, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Info Guru
Picture of BamaJeepster
posted Hide Post
Reminds me of what Irving Berlin said of Groucho:

"The world would not be in such a snarl, had Marx been Groucho instead of Karl".



“Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passions, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence.”
- John Adams
 
Posts: 29408 | Location: In the red hinterlands of Deep Blue VA | Registered: June 29, 2001Reply With QuoteReport This Post
High Speed Low Drag
Operator in the Innis Mode
Picture of Ke Bo Li
posted Hide Post
the FDA has been making progress on Ketamine derivatives.....


***********************
I think the "check engine" light is burned out
 
Posts: 710 | Location: Portland,OR | Registered: October 20, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
Um Boss, you feeling ok? I mean, I'm glad you have a vision and all but any headaches?
 
Posts: 281 | Location: Outside St. Louis | Registered: June 14, 2015Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Alea iacta est
Picture of Beancooker
posted Hide Post
Not a terrible idea. That said, I would venture to guess you’ve never actually fried on acid.
Unfortunately, about 12 hours later the ride ends and you sleep.
If you’re lucky you wake up and do it all over again.
Then someday you grow up, and become an upstanding member of society and wish you could go back to the stress free days of working a shit job that you don’t care about losing, and fry your balls off every night.
Then you look at your wife and the SxS in the garage, the guns and ammo ready to shoot in the morning and realize you wasted so much time and brain cells frying your ass off al, summer long when you were a dumbass kid.
lol. Yeah, most if this probably didn’t make sense.



quote:
Originally posted by parabellum: You must have your pants custom tailored to fit your massive balls.
The “lol” thread
 
Posts: 4025 | Location: Staring down at you with disdain, from the spooky mountaintop castle.  | Registered: November 20, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
I'm in, but somebody's got to teach me that leg-twist he does about 1:57.

If that won't work, please accept my resignation. I don't want to belong to any club that will accept me as a member.


--------------------------
Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.
-- H L Mencken

I always prefer reality when I can figure out what it is.
-- JALLEN 10/18/18
 
Posts: 9158 | Location: Illinois farm country | Registered: November 15, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Peace through
superior firepower
Picture of parabellum
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Beancooker:
That said, I would venture to guess you’ve never actually fried on acid.
Yeah, I know nothing about these things.

https://sigforum.com/eve/forums...120008834#9120008834

And, your specific guess was wrong as well.


____________________________________________________

"I am your retribution." - Donald Trump, speech at CPAC, March 4, 2023
 
Posts: 107567 | Registered: January 20, 2000Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Peace through
superior firepower
Picture of parabellum
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by ScooterX:
Um Boss, you feeling ok? I mean, I'm glad you have a vision and all but any headaches?
Lemmee ask you- have you ever seen anyone watching a Marx Brothers film while pissed off? Huh? No, of course not. I rest my case. Thank you.

 
Posts: 107567 | Registered: January 20, 2000Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of jbcummings
posted Hide Post
Suggestion, just Dems and RINOs. While they’re busy getting an attitude adjustment, the rest of us can fix most of the problems, get the debt in order and maybe get in a nap or two before they get back and figure out what happened. That way, too, if there are any permeant side effects from the “light acid” there’s no real loss to anyone that really counts. It’ll also reduce the cost unless you’ve got a discount worked out with someone.


———-
Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for thou art crunchy and taste good with catsup.
 
Posts: 4306 | Location: DFW | Registered: May 21, 2012Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Alea iacta est
Picture of Beancooker
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by parabellum:
quote:
Originally posted by Beancooker:
That said, I would venture to guess you’ve never actually fried on acid.
Yeah, I know nothing about these things.

https://sigforum.com/eve/forums...120008834#9120008834

And, your specific guess was wrong as well.


Para, my apologies for making assumptions. I really would not have thought that you would have messed with things of this nature.
One thing to note, mushrooms are like beer. LSD is like Everclear.
That said, I have had two bad experiences in my youth, and both were from mushrooms.
I saw more and felt more with LSD. I freaked out more when I ate a bunch of shrooms and just didn’t feel right.
That said, you couldn’t pay me enough to drop acid again.

Once again, I apologize for making assumptions. I shouldn’t have been so short sighted and ignorant.
I blame the LSD. =)



quote:
Originally posted by parabellum: You must have your pants custom tailored to fit your massive balls.
The “lol” thread
 
Posts: 4025 | Location: Staring down at you with disdain, from the spooky mountaintop castle.  | Registered: November 20, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
  Powered by Social Strata Page 1 2  
 

SIGforum.com    Main Page  Hop To Forum Categories  The Lounge    My idea to save America

© SIGforum 2024