Heard a Dr. on TV say to have inner peace we should always finish things we start and we all could use more calm in our lives.

I looked through my house to find things i'd started and hadn't finished, so I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Chardonnay, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of wum, tha mainder of Valiumun srciptuns, an a box a chocletz. Yu haf no idr how feckin fablus I feel rite now. Sned this to all who need inner piss. An telum u uvum.

And two al hve a Marry Crispmouse.

Seems to have worked!