____________________________________________________________ Money may not buy happiness...but it will certainly buy a better brand of misery
A man should acknowledge his losses just as gracefully as he celebrates his victories
Remember, in politics it's not who you know...it's what you know about who you know
September 05, 2019, 05:54 PM
egregore
When you open a can of whoop-ass, Chuck Norris jumps out.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a bulletproof vest. The bullets will realize they are hopelessly outmatched and fall harmlessly to the ground.
September 05, 2019, 06:03 PM
TigerDore
September 05, 2019, 10:46 PM
Rightwire
Chuck Norris doesn't do push ups, he pushes the earth down
Pronoun: His Royal Highness and benevolent Majesty of all he surveys
343 - Never Forget
Its better to be Pavlov's dog than Schrodinger's cat
There are three types of mistakes; Those you learn from, those you suffer from, and those you don't survive.
September 05, 2019, 11:04 PM
radioman
"There is no finish line. When you reach one goal, find a new one."
-Chuck Norris
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September 06, 2019, 01:38 AM
Lord Vaalic
Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee. Except Chuck Norris
Don't weep for the stupid, or you will be crying all day
September 06, 2019, 01:57 AM
mk689
Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
September 06, 2019, 04:29 AM
egregore
The Romans do as Chuck Norris does.
September 06, 2019, 06:52 AM
blueye
The reason they didn't find life on Mars was because Chuck Norris was already there.
September 06, 2019, 08:14 AM
just1tym
Regards, Will G.
September 06, 2019, 09:00 AM
tacfoley
Fire watches Chuck Norris prevention safety movies.
September 06, 2019, 09:36 AM
Phantom229
Chuck Norris doesn’t go hunting. Hunting implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
Situation awareness is defined as a continuous extraction of environmental information, integration of this information with previous knowledge to form a coherent mental picture in directing further perception and anticipating future events. Simply put, situational awareness mean knowing what is going on around you.
September 06, 2019, 10:39 AM
rsbolo
Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch. He DECIDES what time it is.
____________________________ Yes, Para does appreciate humor.
September 06, 2019, 12:37 PM
RaiseHal
When he was born, Chuck Norris slapped the doctor.
It's a shame that youth is wasted on the young --- Mark Twain
Anyone who is not a liberal by age 20 has no heart; anyone who is not a conservative by age 40 has no brain---Winston Churchill
September 06, 2019, 12:40 PM
dusty3030
Chuck Norris built the hospital he was born in.
Chuck Norris's blood type is AK47.
September 06, 2019, 06:39 PM
JD83
Superman once challenged Chuck Norris to an arm wrestling match. They agreed that the loser would have to wear his underwear over his pants-for the rest of his life.
__________________________
September 06, 2019, 06:45 PM
JD83
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September 06, 2019, 06:52 PM
12131
Friday saves Thursday from Chuck's wrath because it ran out of space for Norris jokes.
Q
October 12, 2019, 09:13 AM
egregore
October 12, 2019, 11:30 AM
tacfoley
Chuck Norris doesn't need automatically-opening store doors - ALL doors open automatically for him.
