Where were you stabbed?

January 23, 2020, 09:03 PM

Cousin Vinnie

So, I'm sitting in court today and a woman is on the witness stand testifying about a bar fight that broke out a couple months ago. The attorney asked her "Were you stabbed during the fracas? The woman hesitates a minute or so and responses; No, I was stabbed between my belly button and my fracas....

January 23, 2020, 09:11 PM

P220 Smudge

I’m fucking dying over here.

______________________________________________
"If the truth shall kill them, let them die.”

Endeavoring to master the subtle art of the grapefruit spoon.

January 23, 2020, 09:13 PM

1s1k

quote:
Originally posted by P220 Smudge:
I’m fucking dying over here.

X2 OMG

January 23, 2020, 09:50 PM

Beancooker

WTF? OMG I’m laughing with you all.

quote:
_{Originally posted by sigmonkey:
I'd fly to Turks and Caicos with live ammo falling out of my pockets before getting within spitting distance of NJ with a firearm.}

January 23, 2020, 10:46 PM

cparktd

Me > Hook Line & Sinker.

So THATS what they are calling it these days?

January 23, 2020, 10:47 PM

arcwelder

Arc.
______________________________
"Like a bitter weed, I'm a bad seed"- Johnny Cash
"I'm a loner, Dottie. A rebel." - Pee Wee Herman
Rode hard, put away wet. RIP JHM
"You're a junkyard dog." - Lupe Flores. RIP

January 23, 2020, 11:11 PM

Hamden106

Years ago we had a Min Pin we named Fracas.
Her name came from an old family friend who had a pup named Freetizor Fracas

January 24, 2020, 06:48 AM

Chris Orndorff

A variation of that line was in one of Wambaugh's early novels, The Choirboys perhaps. Fracas is not a word you hear very often.

__________________

"Owning a handgun doesn't make you armed any more than owning a guitar makes you a musician." -Jeff Cooper

January 24, 2020, 08:28 AM

Timdogg6

Very similar to a very long long line of questioning I had of a carnie. He was claiming a slip and fall hurt his back. After 2 hours of "honest sir I have never had back pain a day in my life" he finally gets drilled with a case of medical records from a bar fight he had gotten into with his boss who had shot him in his lower back with a .38

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd the case is dismissed!

January 24, 2020, 08:50 AM

bdylan

Lucky it missed her fracas...that would likely prove fatal.

January 24, 2020, 08:58 AM

hjs157

Reminds me of an old golf joke.

A young woman was taking golf lessons and had just started playing her first round when she was stung by a yellowjacket. Her pain was so intense she decided to return to the clubhouse for medical assistance. The golf pro saw her heading back and said, “You're back early, what’s up?” “I was stung by a bee!” she said. “Where'd it get you?” he asked. “Between the first and second hole.” she replied. "Well" he said, “I can see your stance is too wide.”

January 24, 2020, 01:16 PM

snoris

According to Wayne and Shuster in their classic routine “Rinse the Blood off my Toga.” Julius Caesar was stabbed in the Rotunda.

That’s a very painful spot...

January 24, 2020, 01:53 PM

Sportshooter

According to a newspaper report, a woman was shot in the fracas and the bullet is in her yet.

January 24, 2020, 02:31 PM

Krazeehorse

quote:
Originally posted by Sportshooter:
According to a newspaper report, a woman was shot in the fracas and the bullet is in her yet.

So the yet is her ass?

January 24, 2020, 02:48 PM

mr kablammo

quote:
Originally posted by Sportshooter:
According to a newspaper report, a woman was shot in the fracas and the bullet is in her yet.

Was she shot by a panda?

"It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye". The Little Prince, Antoine de Saint-Exupery, pilot and author, lost on mission, July 1944, Med Theatre.