quote:

Originally posted by lbj:
I got to thinking (wrongly of course) that maybe I should be a bit more of an asshole. That way, I could drive them away just enough they won't think of me as a saint. That such would make it easier for them to deal with the loss that will come one day.

My father's behavior the last year or so has made very little sense to me until I read this. Thank you, lbj, for not doing this to your family. Yesterday, my sister and I had a long conversation about everything and more or less concluded that he is dying of lung cancer, won't admit it or get treated for it, and he's going to have as much fun as he can until then. Unfortunately, that has meant blowing off his children and only grandchild to instead buy a 2016 fully loaded Camaro. Easier to spend a chunk of money on a car than quit smoking so he can get to know his two year old grandson a little bit more before he goes, I guess. They've met only once.

I'll be keeping you and your family in my prayers. Thanks for sharing your mind with us about this whole thing.

Both of your posts above, and that of other members posting that this thread has changed their lives in a positive way, is exactly the reason I continue it.
I want to help myself and others. This is why I put myself out here.

For some, death is a very private matter.
And that is very different from how I am doing things.
I truly believe that this thread helps me examine my own mortality and the process of dying, as well as others can read this in real time and get a glimpse of what it's like.
I haven't really looked for any material like this thread. This thread may be the type that is more common than I think.

But I think it is probably fairly unique.
And the book The Little Prince affected me in so many ways since I was young.
Yeah, that's it, I am unique in all the world. Or it is my wish to be so.

quote:

Originally posted by P220 Smudge:
My father's behavior the last year or so has made very little sense to me until I read this. Thank you, lbj, for not doing this to your family. Yesterday, my sister and I had a long conversation about everything and more or less concluded that he is dying of lung cancer, won't admit it or get treated for it, and he's going to have as much fun as he can until then. Unfortunately, that has meant blowing off his children and only grandchild to instead buy a 2016 fully loaded Camaro. Easier to spend a chunk of money on a car than quit smoking so he can get to know his two year old grandson a little bit more before he goes, I guess. They've met only once.

I'll be keeping you and your family in my prayers. Thanks for sharing your mind with us about this whole thing.

I am quite the opposite of your dad, though I do feel for him and you too.
Everybody does it there own way I guess.

I actually do not want to blow my financial holdings. I want my family to have it. I have had my time in the sun, it will be time soon enough for them to have their times in the sun.
I love them and they deserve what I leave them.

My wife told me a couple months back that I should buy a new car. Mine is 12 years old with 170,000 miles. I told her I thought it was unnecessary, I like my old war horse X5 Sport.
Besides, I would rather them have the 80K a new X5 would cost.

Arg pirates. I have to go to work today as am I getting busy shuttering my franchise.
My goal is to have almost everything done by August 31st.
After a couple of hours today, I will need to stop for the day as my stamina is less than I would like it to be.

I'd rather go the range today but it is not to be.

I received an email from the Army today.
They were a sponsor of my professional football team. They owe me some advertising revenue.

I told them that as a patriotic act, they owe me nothing, that the slate is zeroed.

I may be patriotic in a general sense, but it has been a long time since I actually did something tangible for the country, and it made me feel good.

Funny how that works.

LBJ, you are a true American bad ass.

I mean it.

I have admired you all these years and you never fail to keep me in awe.

I owe the country what I did today. Nothing more, nothing less.

For the last few years, the Army has had swearing in ceremonies at halftime one game a year.
There would be like 30 young men and women out there taking their oaths on my field.
We had those games designated as Military Appreciation Night and Rangers would repel down from the rafters, stop halfway and toss Army gear to the fans before descending onto the field.
It was always quite a sight.

It was time to pay it back for the pleasure I derived just watching it all.

However, in previous years, I did keep the money.

quote:

Originally posted by lbj:

Rangers would repel down from the rafters, stop halfway and toss Army gear to the fans before descending onto the field.
It was always quite a sight.

God Bless You.

You wouldn't have a photo of that to post up would you?

Prayers Sent
Roy

Maybe. I will check with what's left of my staff.
It's really a skeleton crew, no pun intended.

quote:

Originally posted by lbj:
Maybe. I will check with what's left of my staff.
It's really a skeleton crew, no pun intended.

Just as long as they aren't using skeleton keys - you're good . . . . ;*)

This post may be redundant but I will post anyway.
This is my message and philosophy of living and facing death. It is a message of happiness, so here it goes.

At times in our lives, we wonder who we are and who will be when we are informed of our imminent demise or just plain outright die.
Of course, we don't spend too much time on the death thing or we would never live.

I wanted to be 5 things when my moment in time arrived regarding my death.
1) I wanted to be a deep thinker.
2) I wanted to be a philosopher.
3) I wanted a relationship with God.
4) I wanted a family.
5) I wanted to know something about life and be able to pass it on.

I can safely say that I have all those things and I am the person I wanted to be for this moment in time.
And then, I began thinking about what happened to me 30 years ago that changed my life.

Back then, I remember telling a co-worker that Friday night was coming and that the days off were truly living.
He told me my life would be short if I was living for the weekends.
He was right of course, I was not living 5 days a week.

Then I began to live every day.
As we are all aware, much of life is mundane, rinse and repeat as it were. So I began to mentally point out the few minutes of true living I was experiencing every day. Then I began to verbalize it every day as living unfolded.

It might be just 5 minutes an a particular day, sometimes more.
It became my Lhasa Apso LBJ greeting me at the door when I came home from work, me and him rolling on the floor in celebration seeing each other.
It might be a walk in the park, maybe it was pizza night and my favorite pizza. It might be a 30 minute sitcom on TV, maybe a 2 hour movie on TV, maybe it was something else. It was Lasher and Van Smack, and now my Lhasa LT along with my family.
There was and is something for me every day.

As I say, I have been doing this for 30 years.
When I look back at my life, I visualize a tunnel on my left with M. C. Escher stairs that do not go up or down. Those steps represent the days of my life.
I can safely say that for the past 30 years, I have lived every day.

Then I got to thinking recently that since I am the person I always wanted to be for this moment of time when my death is at hand, and given the fact that I have truly lived each and every day for the last thirty years, and given that I really have not changed who I am the last 30 years except at the margins, it became clear that I have always been the person I wanted to be, I just never had that answer as God doesn't typically makes us privvy to such knowledge.

How many people get such a gift? Some perhaps, though unfortunately, not all of us.
What I have been given is truly a blessing.

When I look at the tunnel I mentioned above, I would not trade anything from my life for more time, I would not want to be anyone else but me even if it meant living longer.
I do not feel cheated in any way that my life is shorter than I thought it would be. I am not bitter about my circumstances.
I am happy being me and that is all there is to it.

Many of you and others are praying for a miracle for me. It's appreciated, it really is.
But when you pray for me, please ask God for another miracle for me because He already gave me most important miracle of all and it's a huge one... it's called me and my life.

Who could ask for a better miracle than life itself. And trust me, lbj did love to stomp on the terra and it felt and feels darn good.

Yeah, I am not scared of being dead, my guess is that being dead is easy. It's not living that scares me a little because living is all I know.

If any of the above can help you or a loved one facing death, please feel free to share this, as it is a message of life, of death, of hope and happiness.

And all of the above is my philosophy regarding life, death and our Creator.

It's a beautiful thing and I mean every word of it.

quote:

Many of you and others are praying for a miracle for me. It's appreciated, I truly am.
But when you pray for me, please ask God for another miracle for me because He already gave me a miracle and it's a huge one... it's called me and my life.
Who could ask for a better miracle than life itself. And trust me, lbj did love to stomp on the terra and it felt and feels darn good.

Wonderful, just wonderful.

I cannot believe you all are actually spending time reading every word of my posts, it is such an honor.

quote:

Originally posted by lbj:
I cannot believe you all are actually spending time reading every word of my posts, it is such an honor.

LOL - how does the saying go?

No sir, it is WE who are honored. Thank you again for sharing with us.

Thank you.

I was once going to write a book called The World According to Wigley.
I never seemed to get around to it and never will.

But then it struck me, the book The World According to Wigley is being written, just in a different format, this thread.

Again, another blessing and something I always intended to write but never did. I had given up and figured the book was over before it began.

Yet here it is!!!
Another dream coming to fruition.

And again again, lots of great things happening to me late in my life.
The hits just keep on coming.
How great is that?

quote:

I cannot believe

We're here.

It's just that some find it difficult to express it.

Lbj, I too have been following this thread daily...I haven't posted lately but I want to assure you that your posts have made a great positive impact in my life while my family and I struggle with end of life (on this world) issues with our dad...
You are in my thoughts and prayers...
Thank you for sharing all that you do with us on this forum...
God bless you and your family.

Forgive me if I am a bit teary eyed right now.
Everyone's comments are appreciated.

I just got back from giving my wife a big thank you. We were each 50 years old when we married. I inherited 2 daughters.
I told her her that I almost missed out, that she is responsible that we are a family.

To which she said sarcastically, "Yeah, and just look at what family you got."

Then I said, "We're Wigleys, that's just how Wigleys are."

I am certain that my sister and brother would agree.

quote:

Originally posted by jehzsa:

quote:

I cannot believe

We're here.

It's just that some find it difficult to express it.

This (words fail me) as well as what lbj said in his most recent posts.

quote:

Originally posted by Ronin1069:

quote:

Originally posted by lbj:
I cannot believe you all are actually spending time reading every word of my posts, it is such an honor.

LOL - how does the saying go?

No sir, it is WE who are honored. Thank you again for sharing with us.

Yup.

I've learned a few things from this thread, especially the part about letting people who like you do things for you. I like to do things for my friends, they like to do things for me and now I let them.

Thanks LBJ.