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Well, it looks like the Babylon Bee just hit another one out of the park. ![]() https://babylonbee.com/news/fe...empting-to-say-hello WASHINGTON, D.C. — All legislative activity was brought to a screeching halt today as returning Pennsylvania Senator John Fetterman unintentionally filibustered the Senate for over seven hours while trying to say "Hello." Senator Fetterman, returning to his duties this week for the first time since checking himself in for inpatient treatment for clinical depression, greeted his fellow lawmakers with an extended speech that consisted of only a few short sentences. "I'm fern…I'm fire…I'm flying…I'm fried…I'm fine. I'm…I'm fine," Fetterman said to other members of the "SNAP and Other Nutrition Assistance in the Farm Bill" Senate Subcommittee. Fetterman then spent the next several hours attempting to form his next sentence, which witnesses believe to have been some variation of the word "Hello." "It's wonderful to see Senator Fetterman lumbering aimlessly through the corridors of the Capitol Building again," Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer said. "It just wasn't the same around here without hearing his staggering footsteps, grunts, and mournful wails after hours." Though Fetterman's unplanned filibuster lasted for over seven hours, Republican members of the Senate privately expressed relief. "Him coming back to work turned out to be a blessing in disguise," one GOP senator said under the condition of anonymity. "The more we can keep him talking, the easier it will be to roadblock the Democrats' agenda. I'm ready to help put him in charge of more committees if it keeps going like this!" At publishing time, Senator Fetterman's speech was still not yet finished, with other committee members hoping the first hearing would be wrapped up sometime before summer. ------------------------------------------------ "It's hard to imagine a more stupid or dangerous way of making decisions, than by putting those decisions in the hands of people who pay no price for being wrong." Thomas Sowell | |||
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Transplanted Hillbilly![]() |
Jesse Kelly calls him "Senator Cucumber". ![]() | |||
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Peace through superior firepower ![]() |
I think the very last thing this walking train wreck needs is weed. But, don't you just love his eloquence? So deep. "It’s 4:20 on 4/20. That’s the tweet." He knows the date and the time. This is WAY past potty training. Good boy! https://twitter.com/d_orison/s.../1649158401899872259 | |||
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Get Off My Lawn![]() |
Democrats want Diane Feinstein OUT because they feel she is too old and forgetful, yet they cream over themselves over this WWF retard? "I’m not going to read Time Magazine, I’m not going to read Newsweek, I’m not going to read any of these magazines; I mean, because they have too much to lose by printing the truth"- Bob Dylan, 1965 | |||
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4:20 on 4/20....Duuuude that's deep. | |||
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Imagine being a fly on the wall at pudding and jell-o time with him and the potatus. Unintelligible gibberish and nonsensical sounds abound. | |||
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Get my pies outta the oven! ![]() |
Oh please ![]() This clown ran a Biden-style campaign where he hid at home the entire time and made like one stop each at his safe deep blue Democrat harbors of Pittsburgh and Philadelphia while Oz crisscrossed the state making appearances and held multiple rallies. "Brutal", huh? Loser
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So, based on all that drama and for his own health, he won't run for re-election? ![]() _________________________________________________________________________ “A man’s treatment of a dog is no indication of the man’s nature, but his treatment of a cat is. It is the crucial test. None but the humane treat a cat well.” -- Mark Twain, 1902 | |||
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Remember Clarence "Lumpy" Rutherford is a fictional character in the television sitcom Leave It to Beaver? Fetterman is the new Lumpy, aka Hoodie. | |||
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Peace through superior firepower ![]() |
Perfectly normal. No problem here. This cat's got a smooth rap... Fetterman raises eyebrows with borderline incoherent questioning in Senate hearing
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Only the strong survive![]() |
Man....that is hard to watch. ![]() 41 | |||
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Well at least most of it was in English, although nonsensical. | |||
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Beyond hard; painful. I had to stop after about one minute. | |||
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Peace through superior firepower ![]() |
Well, maybe a visit to the crank bank is what he needs. Get all systems up and running. Whatever they're doing for him now sure isn't working. | |||
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St. Vitus Dance Instructor ![]() |
Hire the handicapped has a whole new meaning. | |||
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Only the strong survive![]() |
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It’s amazing what the mind is capable of! As I was listening and watching him speak I was actually finishing and understanding what he was trying to say. Much like this: S1M1L4RLY, Y0UR M1ND 15 R34D1NG 7H15 4U70M471C4LLY W17H0U7 3V3N 7H1NK1NG 4B0U7 17 ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ | |||
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אַרְיֵה![]() |
I think that Mr. 'Bellum said it best: "Mambo dogface to the banana patch." הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים | |||
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Itchy was taken![]() |
He can filibuster the Senate saying "Good Morning" _________________ This space left intentionally blank. | |||
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Get my pies outta the oven! ![]() |
LMAO this just keeps getting better and better. They drag this slob out to speak at a press conference yesterday on the debt ceiling, are there not dresscode requirements in the US Senate? He sounds like my eight year old trying to give a report in front of his class, complete with the little look up at the end like “did I do good? ![]() https://twitter.com/charliekir...ATrcntUVmjHy8YyHvPCg I cannot tell you how embarrassed I am to be from the state of Pennsylvania right now. | |||
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