Almost all of the nuts at Costco come with a warning label on the package

"Remove/discard shells before consuming"

Really ?

I have to wonder how many have died because of failure to remove the shells prior to eating them .

or maybe it's just Costco customers.

Please Lord, prevent me from preparing a full-on answer to this post.

It is late in the afternoon on a rainy Friday, and I have been a good boy this week, but I am sorely tried by the temptation before me.

I have resolved to be a better man and not to shitpost, but, I must confess, this is difficult.

I hope I can get through the remainder of today without saying unfortunate things about my dangerous nuts and any accompanying cautionary warning label.

Amen.

Artie, I'm praying for you and your dangerous nuts.

Hang in there bro, you can do this!

Bendable, can't say I've ever bothered to read any warnings. I'll update this thread on my next nut purchase.

Have you heard the old saying “as nervous as a hound trying to pass a peach pit”. Will try that with a whole walnut, brings tears to your eyes don’t it.

The work of corporate attorneys after some dumb ass tried to sue after chocking on a pistachio after sucking the salt off of the shell but forgetting to spit out to shell.

I believe a jar of Planters peanuts in addition to having peanuts listed first in the ingredient has no less than two warnings:

Warning: This product contains peanuts
Warning: This product is processed in a plant on machinery that processes nuts.

The good news is I don't believe they cause cancer in California.

I can't do it. I can't post my first reaction...



Next thing you know, someone will be posting a "Dick in a Box" video.

Harmful if swallowed

Usually a warning that says "Warning: Contains Nuts"

I sometimes collect such things:

“Jar may be hot after heating ….”
Label on jar of Hershey’s hot fudge topping.

“To prepare stuffing with less margarine, decrease margarine ….”
Instructions on box of Kraft™ Stove Top® stuffing mix.

“… crystallized cane juice …” List of ingredients, Celestial Seasonings Chai concentrate. (None of that evil sugar in our products!)

“Do not use this AC adapter with a radio as it may cause some noises.”
Data sheet, Sony AC-E60A AC power adapter supplied with Sony shortwave radio.

quote:

I hope I can get through the remainder of today without saying unfortunate things about my dangerous nuts and any accompanying cautionary warning label.

... Resist!
Amen.

The only man with dangerous nuts.

Ok Is that General Macauliffe????

No, that’s one place I’d would never want to get a tattoo.

When I was teenager, definitely...

quote:

Originally posted by sigfreund:
I sometimes collect such things:

“Jar may be hot after heating ….”
Label on jar of Hershey’s hot fudge topping.

“To prepare stuffing with less margarine, decrease margarine ….”
Instructions on box of Kraft™ Stove Top® stuffing mix.

“… crystallized cane juice …” List of ingredients, Celestial Seasonings Chai concentrate. (None of that evil sugar in our products!)

“Do not use this AC adapter with a radio as it may cause some noises.”
Data sheet, Sony AC-E60A AC power adapter supplied with Sony shortwave radio.

I love me and my wife love finding them on products and descriptions #4 the AC power adapter is to provide DC to electronics.

This could lead to a discussion of the hilarious stick figures found in warnings on farm machinery

A man walks into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder. He steps up to the bar, sets the monkey on the bar, slides the peanut bowl over to the monkey, then orders a beer. While the man is drinking his beer, the monkey takes a peanut and after looking at it and shelling it...sticks it up his ass, then eats the peanut. the brtender sees this and tells the man,"Hey! Get that nasty animal outa my bar."

"What nasty animal?" replied the man...

"That monkey"says the bartender, "He's hulling those peanuts, sticking them up his ass, then eating them."

"Oh, He's not being nasty...He's being cautious."

"How do you figure that?"
ask the bartender.

"Well you see," explained the man, "my monkey used to eat everything. Then one day a woman gave him a peach and he ate that peach, pit and all, and it took three days to pass that pit, now he gauges everything to be sure it will come out before it goes in”

That monkey should have read the warning label