Wife and I have had our legal documents prepared by an Attorney and everything is up to date. However, I struggle to get my four daughters to do the same or even recognize the sense of urgency as most of them are married and have children and are in their 30's or early 40's.

In an effort to offer another option, I'd like to recommend a software program they could use and, while not perhaps as comprehensive as utilizing an Attorney, might get most of the job done.

Any recommendations? Thanks.

Willmaker

Not the optimal solution, but will work well for lots of folks.

I am not a lawyer, but have been through some lessons on this front!

My kids are in their late 20's to mid 30's. They all claim to have their documents in order but I really have no idea on the details.

One thing you can say to your kids is that everyone has a will and advanced directives already. It is the one the state has as the default. Which probably really sucks and doesn't match what they want.

Another point to make is that without good documents the process takes forever (and costs $$) through the courts. Their kids could be in limbo for a very very long time without the right documents in place to allocate who will get custody and how the $ will be controlled. Just as a simple example, we are on the eve of 3 years since my father's passing, and the courts are still farting around with his estate. It not large, nobody is contesting it, and it all goes to support my very disabled sister. The court doesn't care, though, as they are dragging it out for who knows what reason (legal fees, looking busy, ??). The assets are withering away quickly with hefty maintenance fees and property taxes on an empty condo. The court doesn't care.

I think one option would be to use your own documents as a template for them. Change the details as necessary. Your attorney will have local knowledge which a software program will not. If your kids are worried about the cost, this approach would be free. Or you could offer to help pay the cost of them going to your lawyer.

If there is any significant wealth in the family which could eventually flow towards them, it is important to protect against the evil future spouse or the ex-spouse. Especially for those who have children they need to have solid documents in place.

We had a neighbor who was a divorced mom of 3 kids, ages about 5 to 8. She had a heart attack one night and died. Her ex was abusive which is why they were divorced, but he and his new wife immediately got custody of the kids. Plus they got control over whatever $$ the deceased left behind. I'm sure she would have wanted the kids to go to her sister's family, but without the right documents...

Another scenario would be one parent dying, perhaps leaving significant life insurance, retirement savings or other assets. Everything is fine until the surviving parent remarries but then divorces. That 2nd spouse gets half of everything in the divorce including half of the life insurance which was supposed to support the kids through college.

My uncle was widowed and then married a widow who had 2 kids in their early teens. She died suddenly of an aneurysm, literally dead before she hit the floor, when the kids were in high school. So here were 2 kids with no living parents. She had good documents and my uncle is a stand-up man who did the right thing, so the outcome was ok. But had it been otherwise, those kids could have been in a bad situation.

These kinds of things happen all the time. My step-grandmother took many millions from our family when my grandfather died and she changed her will to send everything to her kids. I am a huge proponent of using a Trust because of that event.

I think getting your kids to see the need is a bigger priority than handing them a software package.

One addition: specific words and phrases are everything when it comes to legal stuff. Your attorney knows about it, which is why you pay him money rather than use the cheap online or software products.

Things nobody thinks about today can suddenly become huge problems a few years down the road. Again, the attorney knows these traps.

Using 2 different words in different parts of the document that, to us laymen, mean the same thing can cause all kinds of problems. Not using the exact correct phrase can invalidate a clause or create problems with government benefits. One wrong word or missing sentence can disqualify a child from benefits, or open up challenges from unpleasant directions.

Another thought, and one that I have thought about, is how to incorporate a firearm trust especially with those like myself in Washington State where the firearm laws are getting stricter by the year it seems.

Need a way for firearms to be handled by my family after I pass.

Just a thought.

You can try but I think the driver would be someone dying close to them. My family were never planners. Then my Dad died and they say I already had funeral arrangements made ahead of time with the burial plot and casket and funeral services paid years ahead of time. That moved my sister to start their own arrangement planning and their trusts. Same with their children.

quote:

Originally posted by old dino:
Another thought, and one that I have thought about, is how to incorporate a firearm trust especially with those like myself in Washington State where the firearm laws are getting stricter by the year it seems.

Need a way for firearms to be handled by my family after I pass.

Just a thought.

Can you not make an list of the firearms and who each is to go to as part of your Will?

A gun trust does the trick to pass on guns.

Depending where one lives, a private transaction before death could transfer ownership without .gov intervention.

quote:

I think getting your kids to see the need is a bigger priority than handing them a software package

^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Correct answer. Bribe them if necessary. Most kids will comply eventually.