I tell the car warranty guys about my 87 Honda with 400,000 miles. They never seem to get past that.
| Get my pies|
outta the oven!
Just don’t answer if you don’t recognize the number, if it’s legit they’ll leave a message. Easy peasy.
I used to use my 1985 Volga and then ask them if I could pay in pigeon guano.
I love the "credit card interest reduction", I had one guy so hyped up because I kept asking him which one did they work for as the recording list both the major companies. He just kept trying to talk around the question until he cursed my entire family
I screamed bloody murder at one of them as soon as they answered, she did not like that.
I love to ask the SS admin ones when they ask my name...."you called me, you should know my name.
I actually had one just admit that it was a scam...I told him I appreciated his honesty then I asked him if rape culture was still an issue in India
Depending my mood I enjoy wasting their time and try to make them feel like shit ....ask them if they still shit outside, who the last person in their family was to die of TB or cholera ....
happened earlier this morning:
him: I am from the medicare department
Me: the maga car department?
him: health insurance:
me: I don't qualify for health insurance
him: your name is .... (gives my name)
me: nope he doesn't live here
him: you are ....
me: nope he must have moved, you must have an old number
him: I have your information right here you are...
me: no and you are in India or some other third world country.
him: Go to Hell, F**CK Off.
So I have met my goal of upsetting one person today... I may just exceed my goal today.
More blessed than I deserve.
I ask them to hold.
You’re a lying dog-faced pony soldier
|Little ray |
Don't answer the phone when it is an unrecognized number. Legit callers will leave a message.
I know it is a little satisfying to irritate them, but it still wastes your time.
Although, I did get one at work a couple of weeks ago for an end-of-life insurance policy. I told the guy I was immortal, and he was flummoxed. That was good for a laugh.
The fish is mute, expressionless. The fish doesn't think because the fish knows everything.
Back in IOS 13 Apple finally added a useful feature instead of only screwing up the user interface (like they do in most releases).
Settings => Phone => Silence Unknown Callers
is truly a beautiful thing! If someone calls from a number that is not in my contacts and I have not called, it never even rings. Straight to voicemail, do not pass go, do not waste my time. If they leave a message, I’ll check it out. Otherwise, sayonara spammers.
|Save an Elephant|
Kill a Poacher
When you answer the phone, "oh thank god you called...there's BLOOD everywhere....what do I do what do I do...I need help cleaning it up...how soon can you get over here to help?" Good for a laugh.
'I am the danger'...Hiesenberg
NRA Certified Pistol Instructor
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|Too soon old, |
too late smart
I’ve enjoyed the heck out of this guy’s work against the scammers. I think watching a couple of his youtube videos finally got my wife’s attention.
Link to a scam buster
To quote the departed Robin WIlliams:
"I. Am. Job." Should do the trick.
I say - oh, that sounds important (or that sounds interesting). Hold on for just a second. I put the phone down and wait to see how long it takes for them to give up. Figure it's the only way I have to waste their time.
It's funny to hear them say 'hello, hello' 'are you still there'. Some stay on for a while. LOL
If I'm not super busy, I'll let them hold then come back and say - really sorry, I'll get back in just a minute - then I'll put the phone down again. That generally gets me put on their do not contact list.
Speak softly and carry a
I quietly tell them to speak softly as I'm not supposed to have a cell phone in prison. Usually gets them to hang up or ask really stupid questions about why I'm in prison.
|Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everybody you meet.|
just used this and he hung up on me
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|Each post crafted from |
rich Corinthian leather
I take an admittedly perverse pleasure in toying with these dingbats when time and mood permit. The more hardcore guys purporting to be from the IRS or Social Security Administration seem to have gotten wiser to games from people like me and tend to hang-up quicker, but the never-ending stream of extended vehicle warranty people keeps me entertained.
When the caller has the stereotypical heavy accent and insists that their name is “Bobby” or “Suzie,” I usually can’t resist defaulting to my best Southern good-old-boy accent or, as an alternative, my game-show-host voice and asking them “Say, what ‘Stan are you in?” This has earned me more than one “F-you” along the way. I also like to give them my name as “Mehoff...Jackson Mehoff. You can call me Jack. Jack Mehoff.” I’m sure I heard this from a movie or a comedian or something. That often brings a conclusion to the call haha...
"The sea was angry that day, my friends - like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli." - George Costanza
I have begun to enjoy screwing with them if I can get a person on the phone. Most are the IRS or Federal Agent phone scam and are a person from the India area.
Most times it is a female so I will ask that if I have a warrant out for me I would like a few questions answered. I will ask if she has a problem with her husband having sex with goats instead of her. I will also go into detail of asking how they can get the bread to stick to the side of the oven and that when I try it it always falls. They always hang up on me.
NRA Benefactor Life Member
You mean the conviction for strangling 23 telemarketers? After stalking them all over the world?
|Too soon old, |
too late smart
Down here in good ol’ boy land, “scammercide” is not a prosecutable offense.
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