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Joke: 3 Old Guys

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June 22, 2017, 10:12 PM
flashguy
Joke: 3 Old Guys
3 Old Guys ..

'Sixty is the worst age to be,' said the 60-year-old man. 'You always feel like you have to pee and most of the time you stand there and nothing comes out.'

'Ah, that's nothin,' said the 70-year-old. 'When you're seventy, you don't have a bowel movement any more. You take laxatives, eat bran, sit on the toilet all day and nothin' comes out!'

'Actually,' said the 80-year -old, 'Eighty is the worst age of all.'

'Do you have trouble peeing, too?' asked the 60-year old.
'No, I pee every morning at 6:00. I pee like a racehorse on a flat rock; no problem at all.'

'So, do you have a problem with your bowel movement?'

'No, I have one every morning at 6:30.'

Exasperated, the 60-year-old said, 'You pee every morning at 6:00 and crap every morning at 6:30. So what's so bad about being 80?'


'I don't wake up until 7:00.'


flashguy (I'm 79 and I understand....)




Texan by choice, not accident of birth
June 22, 2017, 10:16 PM
Outnumbered
I'm 40 and that's funny, for now.....

Thanks for the laugh though! Smile
June 23, 2017, 11:09 AM
Orguss
quote:
Originally posted by flashguy:
I pee like a racehorse on a flat rock ...

I get the part about peeing like a racehorse, but what's the part about flat rocks?



"I'm yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet raised to an alarming extent by Hollywood and Madison Avenue, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you're old and weak!" - Calvin, "Calvin & Hobbes"
June 23, 2017, 11:12 AM
hray
quote:
Originally posted by Orguss:
quote:
Originally posted by flashguy:
I pee like a racehorse on a flat rock ...

I get the part about peeing like a racehorse, but what's the part about flat rocks?


Back splash and sound it makes I believe


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June 23, 2017, 12:05 PM
Expert308
"Peeing like a big dog on a flat rock" is the other way I've heard that one said.
June 23, 2017, 03:01 PM
lyman
quote:
Originally posted by Expert308:
"Peeing like a big dog on a flat rock" is the other way I've heard that one said.


local version is for describing rain

as in Raining like a cow pissing on a flat rock,

believe it may be a line in the movie Missouri Breaks,,



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June 23, 2017, 03:10 PM
GWbiker
Never pass up a chance to have a pee and never trust a fart.


*********
"Some people are alive today because it's against the law to kill them".
June 23, 2017, 03:34 PM
Fla. Jim
quote:
Originally posted by Orguss:
quote:
Originally posted by flashguy:
I pee like a racehorse on a flat rock ...

I get the part about peeing like a racehorse, but what's the part about flat rocks?


Heard it said quite often from my Dad.

"Raining like a (tall) cow pissing on a flat rock” is a popular expression in Texas and other southern states. The expression is similar to “raining cats and dogs,” meaning a lot of rain and splashing everywhere.

“He made more noise about it than a cow pissin’ on a flat rock” has been cited in print since at least 1949.