Originally posted by RogueJSK: The divorce will be filed next week, and it'll be finalized 30ish days later.
Did you do it yourself?
My sister paid a lawyer through the nose for her divorce so I did it myself as there were no kids and everything was amicable. Cost us $40.
March 14, 2020, 01:44 PM
jljones
quote:
Originally posted by Warhorse: Well, I guess I must say my condolences, and congratulations on finding happiness while you are still on this side of the grass.
"Do you know why a divorce is so expensive? Because it is so worth it!"
Hahahahaha I thought the same thing. Enjoy your new life my friend. Life is too short to be miserable.
"It's a bold strategy, Cotton. Let's see if it works out for them"
March 14, 2020, 02:02 PM
wreckdiver
I pray that you have the luck that I did after my first divorce.
first marriage lasted 2 years, current wife and I are together 34 years in May
_________________________________________________
"Once abolish the God, and the Government becomes the God." --- G.K. Chesterton
March 14, 2020, 02:13 PM
RogueJSK
quote:
Originally posted by Kraquin:
quote:
Originally posted by RogueJSK: The divorce will be filed next week, and it'll be finalized 30ish days later.
Did you do it yourself?
My sister paid a lawyer through the nose for her divorce so I did it myself as there were no kids and everything was amicable. Cost us $40.
Partly. We did the property division ourselves. But I'm paying a lawyer for a few hours of work to answer questions, prepare the paperwork, file it, and go to court with us next month. That way I have someone to ask for clarification on certain stuff and we know it's being done correctly, and if things happen to turn ugly I already have representation.
It's not $40, but the cost is very reasonable, considering the added peace of mind. Even if we did it all without a lawyer, it'd still be a minimum of ~$185 just in filing fees.
March 14, 2020, 02:43 PM
Prefontaine
Happy to hear it's amicable. You are in a great situation comparatively. I've seen it go completely in the opposite direction. Best of luck sir.
What am I doing? I'm talking to an empty telephone
March 14, 2020, 04:19 PM
ador
Rogue, I’m glad that the process is not a painful and messy one. Amicable divorce is always better. Cooler heads prevail and no one is going after the other like enemies. My divorce from my 1st wife was amicable as well. Only difference is we have a child. I just felt horrible because our daughter became a total stranger to me (by her choice) after we separated. Good for you that there are no children to worry about. Good luck and be happy brother. Sometimes I wish I just remained single. I love my current wife. But there are times when I wish I just stayed single.
_______________________ P228 - West German
March 14, 2020, 04:49 PM
jimmy123x
quote:
Originally posted by RogueJSK:
quote:
Originally posted by Kraquin:
quote:
Originally posted by RogueJSK: The divorce will be filed next week, and it'll be finalized 30ish days later.
Did you do it yourself?
My sister paid a lawyer through the nose for her divorce so I did it myself as there were no kids and everything was amicable. Cost us $40.
Partly. We did the property division ourselves. But I'm paying a lawyer for a few hours of work to answer questions, prepare the paperwork, file it, and go to court with us next month. That way I have someone to ask for clarification on certain stuff and we know it's being done correctly, and if things happen to turn ugly I already have representation.
It's not $40, but the cost is very reasonable, considering the added peace of mind. Even if we did it all without a lawyer, it'd still be a minimum of ~$185 just in filing fees.
Your very lucky. Here in Florida if the spouse contests any aspect of the divorce, it takes 2 years and lots of $$$$$. My sister tried to give her ex husband a great deal, both make very good money, both have solid pre-nups. He turned into a severe drunk at night yelling at her and the kids for 2 years, the final straw was her co-worker saw him getting laid in the back seat of his car with his co-worker. So she offered him 30/70 custody, he fought it. 2 years and the divorce was final, and then he contested it so another year now.
March 14, 2020, 06:05 PM
Stlhead
Jimmy, how does your sisters divorce details help the OP or any of us. No need be needs to hear about that shit.
March 14, 2020, 06:24 PM
gjgalligan
As a dog lover I would suggest you rethink splitting up the dogs. You will be gone to work all day and the dog is most likely are not use to being alone all day. The are use to having each other when all the humans are gone.
Maybe split the time, you have them for 2 weeks then your ex gets them for 2 weeks or something like that.
Integrity is doing the right thing, even when nobody is looking.
March 14, 2020, 06:26 PM
Il Cattivo
I'm sorry to hear about it but glad it's not worse. A bit of advice in the hopes it'll help things keep going smoothly - make sure your wife and your lawyer know specifically who your lawyer is working for.
March 14, 2020, 07:14 PM
RHINOWSO
quote:
Originally posted by Stlhead: Jimmy, how does your sisters divorce details help the OP or any of us. No need be needs to hear about that shit.
Because he slept at a Holiday Inn Express last night.
March 14, 2020, 10:24 PM
shooter1201
BTDT. I was in the last 30 minutes of my shift when my then wife of almost 23 years called to tell me she was leaving. She didn't want to go to counseling. She didn't want the house. She ended up with all the furnishings and my gun collection. 15 years later and I'm still rebuilding it. Our divorce took 2 months from start to finish. 5 months later she sends me a txt telling me she'd just gotten married to a guy she claimed she had only known a month. He was our church's secretary's brother. Hey. Life DOES get better.
I was paid $7.54/HR to go into harm's way so you didn't have to.
March 14, 2020, 10:30 PM
RogueJSK
quote:
Originally posted by gjgalligan: As a dog lover I would suggest you rethink splitting up the dogs. You will be gone to work all day and the dog is most likely are not use to being alone all day. The are use to having each other when all the humans are gone.
Maybe split the time, you have them for 2 weeks then your ex gets them for 2 weeks or something like that.
Nope, definitely not splitting time. My dog is mine. Her dog is hers. I'm a dog lover too, and 2 weeks on/2 weeks off would be confusing as shit for a dog. (Hell, most human children don't do well with a split custody schedule like that...)
Besides, my dog was an "only dog" for most of his life. She recently got her dog back in October, mostly because we knew the marriage was circling the drain, and she wanted a dog of her own for when/if we divorced.
So the two dogs have only been together for ~5 months.
So I get "custody" of mine, she gets "custody" of hers. We each get reasonable play dates as agreed upon by both (like if she wants to pick up my dog for a few hours on a Sunday afternoon to take both to the dog park together, or whatever). And we each get right of first refusal for boarding of the others' dog when the other person is going to be out of town for work/vacation.
March 14, 2020, 11:06 PM
jimmy123x
quote:
Originally posted by Stlhead: Jimmy, how does your sisters divorce details help the OP or any of us. No need be needs to hear about that shit.
Because the alternative could be far worse.
March 15, 2020, 12:15 AM
Jus228
I’m sorry to hear that.
Mine was very pain free as well. (The divorce in a legal sense) and only cost us $90. A 13yr relationship with my best friend falling apart, that i may never recover from.
!~God Bless the U.S. Military~!
If the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off
Light travels faster than sound, this is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
March 15, 2020, 01:34 PM
Modern Day Savage
J, we sometimes get to know someone by their words even though we've never met them. I don't celebrate the ending of a relationship or marriage, but sometimes it's the best course to take.
Short term, there is some busy and difficult times ahead but they will pass...you're a good guy and you are going to land on your feet.
One of the classic 'cutting loose, casting off, and moving on' songs...written about the girl on the album cover.
My ex and I used a 3rd party mediator from a legal practice we knew the owner of. After discussions about equitable split of property, the mediator helped us formalize that into an agreement to present to the judge. 6 hours plus a little paralegal time.
I will say though, the first thing you find are the hidden money problems that have been lied about. If you think that is the extent of the lies, and nothing else was going on, you can leave it at that.
But I told my ex, now that the house of cards is falling down, all the lies need to come out. There was a lot more, and it was a lot worse. And when she said all the lies had been told and she had "come clean" on everything, she was still lying. I found out the rest other the course of a few more months. I tried to get us into counseling early on, but she deep sixed it by refusing to "commit" to the counsellors course of treatment. This was before the lies were exposed so she was trying to avoid a situation where she might have to be truthful...