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Too clever by half
Picture of jigray3
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A system for restaurants that functions like noise canceling headphones. Some restaurants just get too loud to have a conversation while having dinner. It would have a simple knob to dial it up and down as necessary, and could even add background noise if it got a little too quiet to add a little buzz to the room.

And a smart phone that is actually a decent phone with good clear audio.




"We have a system that increasingly taxes work, and increasingly subsidizes non-work" - Milton Friedman
 
Posts: 10377 | Location: Richmond, VA | Registered: December 11, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Oh stewardess,
I speak jive.
Picture of 46and2
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A real Hoverboard, and a Cure for Parkinson's.

 
Posts: 25613 | Registered: March 12, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
delicately calloused
Picture of darthfuster
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I'd invent a device that would make folks I didn't like water their loin cloth on demand. So when some loathsome character is speaking publicly and lying through his teeth I can just touch the button and the bladder evacuates for all to see.

As long as we are dreaming, I'd invent a device that would undo tension in fasteners. Bad guy points a weapon at me? touch the button, gun falls apart. Driver in front at the light texting misses the light change? car falls apart. Enemy tank has the squad pinned down? Tank comes apart to the last screw.



You’re a lying dog-faced pony soldier
 
Posts: 30023 | Location: Norris Lake, TN | Registered: May 07, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
I will get by
Picture of Rustyblade
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bucket of round-2-its

After a few years driving in SE Florida -- I''d like a 'ray-gun' that I can aim at texting inattentive drivers which re-locates them in their car about 80 miles west of El Paso...


Do not necessarily attribute someone's nasty or inappropriate actions as intended when it may be explained by ignorance or stupidity.
 
Posts: 1291 | Location: Delray Beach | Registered: February 21, 2012Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Picture of bigdeal
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Remember that movie 'Click' with Adam Sandler? I'd invent one of those universal remotes that would allow me to mute anyone, and to move forward or backward through time.


-----------------------------
Guns are awesome because they shoot solid lead freedom. Every man should have several guns. And several dogs, because a man with a cat is a woman. Kurt Schlichter
 
Posts: 33845 | Location: Orlando, FL | Registered: April 30, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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My invention would be a device that causes the human body to regenerate lost or failed parts. Lose a limb, use my device to cause the body to grow a new one. Kidney failure? No problem. Remove the bad ones and my device will cause the body to regenerate new ones. Early investors welcomed!
 
Posts: 694 | Location: E. Central Missouri | Registered: January 05, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Coin Sniper
Picture of Rightwire
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quote:
Originally posted by kkina:
quote:
Originally posted by Rightwire:
A left handed smoke bender

You wouldn't be some kind of Boy Scout leader, would you? Wink


An Eagle and at one time I was ... Big Grin




Pronoun: His Royal Highness and benevolent Majesty of all he surveys

343 - Never Forget

Its better to be Pavlov's dog than Schrodinger's cat

There are three types of mistakes; Those you learn from, those you suffer from, and those you don't survive.
 
Posts: 38490 | Location: Above the snow line in Michigan | Registered: May 21, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Lost
Picture of kkina
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quote:
Originally posted by Rightwire:
quote:
Originally posted by kkina:
quote:
Originally posted by Rightwire:
A left handed smoke bender

You wouldn't be some kind of Boy Scout leader, would you? Wink


An Eagle and at one time I was ... Big Grin

I never was a Scout but I was in the high school backpacking club. Whenever we camped near Scouts, we would wait.... You know what happened next. They'd pick the dorkiest kid and send him around the campground asking for a "left handed smoke shifter". Sometimes we'd tell him we only brought right-handed ones, other times we'd just laugh at him in the cruelest manner humanly possible. Good times.



ACCU-STRUT FOR MINI-14
"First, Eyes."
 
Posts: 17240 | Location: SF Bay Area | Registered: December 11, 2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Picture of 229DAK
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A device that would allow me to see my life had I made different choices growing up, like:

What if I had never entered Boy Scouts.

What if I had gone to a different college.

What if I had dated a different girl/married someone else.

What if I had chosen a different line of work.

Oh...and our scout troop had a bacon stretcher, if a kid came along asking for one. Big Grin


_________________________________________________________________________
“A man’s treatment of a dog is no indication of the man’s nature, but his treatment of a cat is. It is the crucial test. None but the humane treat a cat well.”
-- Mark Twain, 1902
 
Posts: 9403 | Location: Northern Virginia | Registered: November 04, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Picture of ergoproxy
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THIS!!! Especially the one that doesn't turn you into a baby as soon as you go back.

quote:
Originally posted by ersatzknarf:
Time machine!

gotta buncha shit i gotta redo.


Frown
 
Posts: 1158 | Location: USA | Registered: December 28, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Picture of ergoproxy
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Or...an invisibility machine that doesn't make you go blind as soon as you go invisible.
 
Posts: 1158 | Location: USA | Registered: December 28, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
אַרְיֵה
Picture of V-Tail
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quote:
Originally posted by ergoproxy:

Or...an invisibility machine that doesn't make you go blind as soon as you go invisible.
You're going to do WHAT if you're invisible?



הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים
 
Posts: 31743 | Location: Central Florida, Orlando area | Registered: January 03, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Picture of ergoproxy
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Nothing yet, because you still go blind.

quote:
Originally posted by V-Tail:
quote:
Originally posted by ergoproxy:

Or...an invisibility machine that doesn't make you go blind as soon as you go invisible.
You're going to do WHAT if you're invisible?
 
Posts: 1158 | Location: USA | Registered: December 28, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Picture of Killer
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I'm going with a time machine.
 
Posts: 347 | Location: Central Illinois | Registered: December 10, 2015Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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the perfect toaster,
every piece would come out exactly like you want it,
weather you toast five pieces of white or seven pieces of rye or 9 bagel's.

consistency , every time.

It would sell for under $65.00
light, medium , medium dark or deep brown.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: bendable,





Safety, Situational Awareness and proficiency.



Neck Ties, Hats and ammo brass, Never ,ever touch'em w/o asking first
 
Posts: 55345 | Location: Henry County , Il | Registered: February 10, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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A Bull Shit detector. Would be useful around Politicians.


*********
"Some people are alive today because it's against the law to kill them".
 
Posts: 8228 | Location: Arizona | Registered: August 17, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Picture of Krazeehorse
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quote:
Originally posted by GWbiker:
A Bull Shit detector. Would be useful around Politicians.

Or needless, if their mouths are moving....


_____________________

Be careful what you tolerate. You are teaching people how to treat you.
 
Posts: 5763 | Location: Ohio | Registered: December 27, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Don't Panic
Picture of joel9507
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Another idea: a device in cars, like we already have on phones, where they can be deactivated by the owner in the event of a theft.

For safety's sake, I'd put in an annunciator that would cycle through, at full audio volume, a recording saying "Theft Detected: This Car Will Stop Itself in 60 Seconds" [in multiple languages, of course]. When the timer expires, the horn goes off and fuel flow drops by 10 percentage points every 10 seconds -90%-80%-70%.... When the fuel flow cuts off completely, all lights flash and the horn goes off intermittently.

That'd be the basic version. The premium version would play "My Sharona" continuously after the timer had reset, also at full audio volume. Wink
 
Posts: 15237 | Location: North Carolina | Registered: October 15, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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