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The Veterinarian Did Not Agree With My Logic

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April 08, 2017, 09:45 PM
V-Tail
The Veterinarian Did Not Agree With My Logic
I have been a dog lover all my life, but I am new to this cat thing. It has been just a few months since Paragon foisted this evil thing on the V-Tail household.

Closet Cat has, unfortunately, come out of the closet. Out, with a vengeance. A black rocket-propelled missile, blasting all over the house. Landing on our bed in bowling ball mode at 3:00 in the morning, then deciding that all humans should be awake. Walking on our sleeping bodies, stamping her feet and poking at us. Carrying her favorite toy in her mouth while speaking loudly, announcing that it is time to play "dangle the string."

I have checked the yellow pages but there are no local listings for "exorcist."

Closet Cat, please go back in the closet, so we can sleep through just one night.
Closet Cat has decided to harf. At least twice daily, maybe more, little piles of cat vomit. Today was the third day of this, so it was time for a visit to Dr. Dolittle.

Getting this creature into the FTD (Feline Transport Device) is like playing whack-a-mole with the mole on a combination of crack and PCP. I finally managed to throw a towel over her, wrap her up, and drop the whole bundle into the FTD, which went into the car for the ten minute trip, all the while cat telling me loudly that she would get revenge for this indignity.

Opened the door of FTD in the exam room and a black streak exploded out, morphing into a blur that challenged our mere human eyes to follow. Once she slowed down the vet's tech girl was able to put her on the scale, the first thing that they do on every visit. 10.6 pounds, no change from last time (this is a significant fact, as the observant reader will discover, and bears directly on the title of this thread).

Indignities followed, taking temperature (normal) while being held in place by two techs and V-Tail so the third tech could insert the thermometer. With the preliminaries out of the way, the Vet came into the room, looked her over, inspected the zip-lock baggie of vomit that I had brought, and said "we might have to X-Ray her to see if there is an intestinal obstruction." He was concerned about the possibility that she had might not have been pooping.

I replied that I had not examined the litter box (I am somewhat mobility limited due to injury and general health, so Mrs. V-Tail usually does that chore) but I was absolutely confident that she was not poop-inhibited.

"Why are you so sure?" asked the vet.

"She still weighs the same as the last visit, two months ago," I answered with impeccable logic.

Vet and two young female techs stared blankly at me for a few seconds, then looked at each other and started non-stop laughing. As soon as one stopped laughing it just took a glance at one of the others to start again.

I don't see what's so funny, I think my logic was perfectly good. Why are they laughing at me?



הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים
April 08, 2017, 09:49 PM
newtoSig765
Cat people have very weird senses of humor?

That's all I got.

(P.S. Three feline rulers in the newtoSig household at the moment)


--------------------------
Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.
-- H L Mencken

I always prefer reality when I can figure out what it is.
-- JALLEN 10/18/18
April 08, 2017, 09:55 PM
TMats
Don't know if you tried it, but it's easier to put a cat into a FTD backwards, if it's not inclined to go.


_______________________________________________________
despite them
April 08, 2017, 09:57 PM
SpinZone
Look at the bright side. At least you can blame Paragon.



“We truly live in a wondrous age of stupid.” - 83v45magna

"I think it's important that people understand free speech doesn't mean free from consequences societally or politically or culturally."
-Pranjit Kalita, founder and CIO of Birkoa Capital Management

April 08, 2017, 10:00 PM
jbcummings
I don't know why the Vet laughed at you, but your story was hilarious! Big Grin


———-
Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for thou art crunchy and taste good with catsup.
April 08, 2017, 10:14 PM
cheesegrits
Very funny story! And your logic seems solid to me.

As for vomit kitty, any chance her food or water is a little stale? One of our cats is sensitive to whether or not the dry food is really fresh.
April 08, 2017, 10:26 PM
V-Tail
quote:
Originally posted by cheesegrits:
Very funny story! And your logic seems solid to me.

As for vomit kitty, any chance her food or water is a little stale? One of our cats is sensitive to whether or not the dry food is really fresh.
Don't think so. My wife noticed quite a bit of hair in the first round of vomiting,

Having ruled out a bowel obstruction for now, the vet thinks that maybe the initial vomiting caused a stomach irritation that continues to induce vomiting. He gave her an anti-nausea shot to try to break that cycle. If that doesn't work, it's back to the vet to spend $$ for X-Rays.

Funny, after the indignities of the thermometer and a gloved finger probe, Cat jumped right into the FTD and did not want to come out. All we could see was a couple of bright eyes peering out through the grill.

Arriving home, she was unusually docile and friendly. Maybe something in the anti-nausea shot?



הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים
April 08, 2017, 10:30 PM
Fenris
Cats know that you will clean up their vomit. They do it to establish dominance over you and train you as their obedient slaves.




God Bless and Protect our Beloved President, Donald John Trump.
April 08, 2017, 10:32 PM
V-Tail
Cat in Feline Transport Device:






הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים
April 08, 2017, 10:38 PM
tatortodd
quote:
Originally posted by Fenris:
Cats know that you will clean up their vomit. They do it to establish dominance over you and train you as their obedient slaves.
You know you are dealing with a true master manipulator when they repeatedly pull off the multi-cleaning product puke. A few examples:
  • Puke on the edge of the rug so you have to use carpet cleaner and wood floor cleaner.
  • Puke off the edge of the bed so you have to wash the bedspread and clean the floor.
  • Saved the best for last - Puke on the couch, jump down, walk a few steps, and puke on the edge of the rug and wood floor.





  • Ego is the anesthesia that deadens the pain of stupidity

    DISCLAIMER: These are the author's own personal views and do not represent the views of the author's employer.
    April 08, 2017, 11:38 PM
    irreverent
    Just curious: did you X-ray or call the wife to check contents of litter box? Did they pull blood for testing, run a fecal for parasites, etc?

    I have a wool sucker here, so I pretty much ignore emesis once I've determined it's contents, and ensured bowel movements. Gotta keep watch, though.

    Is your kitty long haired, by chance? I'm sure Paragon has given you a rundown on kitty habits already, but perhaps a hairball?

    Cats be cats- at least in my home, where they are not allowed outdoor access to all the issues that might otherwise exist.

    To your original question, being same weight as last time just means she's holding steady- that could be possible even if she's blocked. They should've let you in on their joke, but maybe it was just a rough day - sounds as though it was for your closet kitty, anyway...


    __________________________

    "Trust, but verify."
    April 08, 2017, 11:46 PM
    ugeesta
    Sounds about right.

    Nice FTD by the way.




    We will never know world peace, until three people can simultaneously look each other straight in the eye

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    April 09, 2017, 07:02 AM
    V-Tail
    quote:
    Originally posted by irreverent:
    Just curious: did you X-ray or call the wife to check contents of litter box? Did they pull blood for testing, run a fecal for parasites, etc?

    Is your kitty long haired, by chance? I'm sure Paragon has given you a rundown on kitty habits already, but perhaps a hairball?

    Cats be cats- at least in my home, where they are not allowed outdoor access to all the issues that might otherwise exist.

    To your original question, being same weight as last time just means she's holding steady- that could be possible even if she's blocked.
    Replying to your questions in order:



    הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים
    April 09, 2017, 07:08 AM
    Fredward
    I use Petromalt. It's billed as a hairball cure, but seems to be effective to prevent vomiting.
    April 09, 2017, 07:22 AM
    Chris Anchor
    Not that I'm anti-cat but after our 19 year old cat died - No more cats in the house. It's great, none of the issues you have. We can pick them up and play then put them down and walk away. We also don't the little monsters running around the house at all hours of the day. They all stay outdoors some in the barn and one near the house plus the other cats that come and visit it from time to time. Life is much better with them out of the house plus it smells better and no clean up of messes. Chris
    April 09, 2017, 08:09 AM
    DaBigBR
    I don't know what they thought was so funny about it, but generally when they get obstructed, they're also eventually and probably quickly doing to stop or reduce eating. If they're truly obstructed, you're probably going to see some very obvious signs before there is significant weight loss.

    Or so says the other half, who is a vet.
    April 09, 2017, 08:13 AM
    Skins2881
    Just went through exact same thing this week with Black. He vomited 6-7 times in a couple hours. Gave anti nausea shot and shot to cut off signal to vomit. Skipped X-ray's at $175.00. Special diet and anti hair ball meds. He seems better now. He did vomit once since then, that's it.

    Good luck with closet kitty!



    Jesse

    Sic Semper Tyrannis
    April 09, 2017, 08:14 AM
    egregore
    quote:
    Originally posted by Chris Anchor:
    Not that I'm anti-cat but after our 19 year old cat died - No more cats in the house. It's great, none of the issues you have. We can pick them up and play then put them down and walk away. We also don't the little monsters running around the house at all hours of the day. They all stay outdoors some in the barn and one near the house plus the other cats that come and visit it from time to time. Life is much better with them out of the house plus it smells better and no clean up of messes. Chris


    ▲ That sounds awfully inconvenient. I'm glad you got it worked out.


    April 09, 2017, 08:27 AM
    prairieviper
    It could be so many things causing your cat to vomit. Sometimes you can tell a lot by the look of what your cat is depositing in the litter box.

    What are you feeding your cat? It could be what she is eating. If your cat is prone to hairballs, Petromalt has worked well for our cats.

    Anyway, there is a lot of information on the internet about common cat problems, cat poop and remedies. I recommend you do some research.

    We have a calico streak of lightning that has decided that 5AM-5:30AM is a good time for us to wake up. Fortunately, we would usually don't sleep much past those times anyway.

    Good luck!


    "In God We Trust"
    April 09, 2017, 08:31 AM
    ulsterman
    We asked our Vet why cats acted like the do. She said "For the most part, cats are insane".