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"Member" |
About 5 years back my ex wife decided that she not only didn't really want to be married, but that she wasn't much interested in being a mother either. So she left. Obviously time spent on this forum has dwindled since. At the time, my girls were about 5 and 6 years old. Now they are obviously a bit older and we've settled into a nice groove as to how to get by. In many ways things are actually much better than before. But I immediately noticed when I'd take them shopping for clothes that every, single salesperson has a comment to make about how nice it is for me to "give mom the day off" or how sweet it is for me to "let mom sleep in." The other day a lady took one look and loudly said, "Where's mom?!" Have any of you EVER experienced this? I'm starting to wonder why this is. I took them shopping when I was married and never had this issue. It's like some weird societal stereotype. | ||
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Tinker Sailor Soldier Pie |
My daughter is only 15 months old, but yes, I've already experienced it. In particular, I go food shopping with my daughter late in the afternoon after my wife goes to work usually and will get comments like that constantly. But then I also get tons of smiles from lots of women. Then again, maybe they're just smiling at my cute daughter... ~Alan Acta Non Verba NRA Life Member (Patron) God, Family, Guns, Country Men will fight and die to protect women... because women protect everything else. ~Andrew Klavan "Once there was only dark. If you ask me, light is winning." ~Rust Cohle | |||
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Stupid Allergy |
I don't get that "treatment" much to be honest, but it would piss me off if it did. Our 6yo girl is with me a lot of the time since I work from home...I'm pretty much Mr.Mom during the week while my wife works. People are stupid, don't let it get to you. "Attack life, it's going to kill you anyway." Steve McQueen... | |||
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Member |
I actually got a comment today in target. My wife and daughter were looking at toys and I brought my 18 month old son with me to get juice and look around the clearance section. A couple around my age with a son said to each other "see he can take his son by himself" the woman said to me after "it's nice to see you take your kid out without mom". I kinda laughed and said "my wife and daughter are over there". It does happen fairly regularly when I am with one of the 2 kids or even both. My standard reply is something along the lines of "well I am their father I am equipped to care for my children" | |||
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Doubtful... |
Yes, they are. Best regards, Tom I have no comment at this time. | |||
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"Member" |
I would be lying if I said it doesn't get to me. This is odd because I'm generally painfully calm. But some people are sooooo rude about it. The lady who loudly asked, "Where's mom?" got a response of "Not here." To which she responded, "But where IS she??" THAT stopped me dead in my tracks and I turned around. My oldest daughter knew damn well what was about to happen and said, "she's working." And she tugged on me to keep me moving. I'm just shocked by how stupid some people can be. Screw it. | |||
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Woke up today.. Great day! |
I have 21yo and 20yo daughters and i have never been asked such a question. And they both love to shoot | |||
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Vi Veri Veniversum Vivus Vici |
Take one of those internet coupons and for ten bucks print up some business card sized notes to hand to these dolts who revel in their ignorance, then immediately walk away. My daughters' mother abandoned them as little girls and I have raised them myself. Please take this moment to reflect on your intrusive, stereotypical behaviour and next time think before you speak uninvited. _________________________ NRA Endowment Member _________________________ "Of all tyrannies, a tyranny exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end, for they do so with the approval of their own conscience." -- C.S. Lewis | |||
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Member |
I have two daughters. The women that make these comments have THEIR ISSUES, that they are projecting onto you. Ignoring this sort of thing is best. Smile and move on. Some people cannot simply mind their own business. | |||
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"Member" |
ChuckFinley- Good thinking. | |||
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Member |
Yep. I have custody of my teenage daughter (17) and have had this happen too. I just smile and brush it off. Some people are just to stupid to respond to. I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I'm not. | |||
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Festina Lente |
Dad of 23-year old and 9-year old daughters. I've gotten those comments too. Good response is "bless your heart". Or, "I'm doing my best to raise them to not be nosy bitches..." NRA Life Member - "Fear God and Dreadnaught" | |||
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"Member" |
My GF is from SC. As I understand it "Bless your heart" is another way of calling someone an idiot. West coast people don't get that. | |||
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A Grateful American |
BTDT with an 11 month old. "Mr. Mom" Let such things go. Strangers neither care nor will have much concern for what your dealing with. And you likely will never encountervthem again. So why worry over it? Focus on the best things for your girls. That investment will payout huge returns. Daughter is 31 and I have 3 beautiful grandchildren. 6-11. No regrets. "the meaning of life, is to give life meaning" ✡ Ani Yehudi אני יהודי Le'olam lo shuv לעולם לא שוב! | |||
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Raised Hands Surround Us Three Nails To Protect Us |
Not just for Dads of girls. I posted about this awhile back in the what's your deal section. I frequently take my boys out shopping or to the park without my wife when she is at the gym or doing other things. I constantly get the ohh look Dad is babysitting comments. I generally keep my cool pretty well with folks stupid comments. Though these comments burn me up and I am usually quite short in letting the know I am not babysitting for mom, I am being their freaking father!!!!! It tends to be older females that make the comments so maybe something to do with old societal norms but still burns me up. ———————————————— The world's not perfect, but it's not that bad. If we got each other, and that's all we have. I will be your brother, and I'll hold your hand. You should know I'll be there for you! | |||
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Just because you can, doesn't mean you should |
Tell them you are their mom and then see if they continue to ask questions. ___________________________ Avoid buying ChiCom/CCP products whenever possible. | |||
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sick puppy |
I love taking my kids to Chick Fil A, Cabelas, Walmart, Target, etc. All together, one on one, whatever it is. Its quality time with my kids and i look forward to it. But yes. I constantly get comments about me "giving the wife a break." It bothered me for quite a while too. I shake it off now. It annoys me that its apparently weird for dads to spend time with their kids.or, if not weird, people act like its a chore that i should bemoan if not hate doing. ____________________________ While you may be able to get away with bottom shelf whiskey, stay the hell away from bottom shelf tequila. - FishOn | |||
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Member |
This is a sure fire way to set me over the edge. As a daughter who was raised by her father (because Mom decided she didn't want to raise her two children anymore and drugs are more fun), i can't tell you how many uncomfortable encounters I've had. When I won an award at work, everyone asked me "are you goin to call your mom"... And I responded, "no but I'm going to tell my dad." Which should have been a subtle hint, but instead they keep asking but what about your mom?!? Until your forced to tell them you haven't talked to said person in a decade and to stfu. Not to mention the relative strangers that try to tell me my life will never be right without my mother. Thank God for all you fathers out there. Whether or not the mother is still in the picture, you are just as important. And to the OP, special thanks to you. Daughters are tough | |||
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Member |
Tell them that she's with a John (or customer) from craigslist, she skipped out on us x years ago. LOL | |||
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Member |
Yep, for the last (XX) years. I normally got smiles... times do change it seems. Maybe for some of them it's their way to find out if you're single? As most fathers with children are more desired by women. | |||
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