"Mary a girl with a big heart and small hands. She'll always love you and think you have a big dick".

All of those people you passed on your way up , will be the same people laughing at you on your way down ..

“Big mouths, get slapped”.

I rarely learn anything the second time I get kicked by the horse……

If my wife is wearing her sexy underwear,
It means the laundry needs done……….

anticipation is often better than realization

A friend of mine used to say that the secret to a happy and successful life is simple - "Don't be an asshole." He said lots of guys he has known never figured that out.

“If you want a winning track and field team, you need one who can jump over 20 feet, not ten who can each jump 2 feet.”

Had a guy in the well digging business who said that you have to stick it to your friends cause your enemies won't deal with you.

He will be voted to most likely wind up dead on a barroom floor.

Benzing's Maxim: "The world is run by those who show up"

No good deed goes unpunished?

You may find that having a thing is not nearly as good as wanting a thing. Its not logical but it is often true.

'The higher up the tree the monkey climbs, more of the other monkeys can see his ass.'

"He's so honest, he gets out of the shower to take a piss."

"A breast in the hand is worth two in the bra".

quote:

Originally posted by Ryanp225:
Be polite and courteous to all those around you, but also have a plan to kill them if needed.

+1

A long time ago I worked a summer job at the utility company. Loading trucks, unloading trucks, moving stuff around the warehouse and storage lot. My supervisor was a retired Marine colonel. More softspoken than me, really, but if you were clear across the lot, his Marine voice would come on and he'd darn sure get your attention.

His teaching sticks in my mind to this day, and I knew it was true the moment he spoke it.

One hot afternoon I was wrestling a transformer off a pallet and Colonel C snuck up on me. Out of nowhere, his face was right at my ear and very calmly he said, "No company is going to pay you to f*** up your back. Get some help!" The first sentence was in his "indoor voice," the second was in his Marine voice.

I hear Colonel C nearly every day when I'm cruising the warehouse and seeing someone wrestle goods into place.

I don't know where he is now, for that's been a very long time ago, but I hope he knows his teachings were not wasted.

- - - - -
Edit: I just found his obituary. Rest peacefully, colonel. I miss you.

What's down in the well comes up in the bucket.

The acorn don't fall too far from the old oak tree.