The wife enjoys watching "speculative" programs. The current one is on UFOs, and much of the evidence of their existence revolves around reports of crashes.

OK, if these aliens are really rocket scientists, how come they manage to run into a planet? Were they texting while driving? Distracted by a crying alien baby? Did they swerve to miss an interstellar "deer"?

If this is the best the universe has to offer, I'll stick with the local planet's vehicular idiots, thank you! At least that beater of a Buick isn't powered by a nuclear drive!

Maybe it was their first attempt at autonomous vehicles?

You know the last guy in medical school is still called doctor. Same has to go with space alien pilots.

An alien once told me it was terrible trying to do touch and go landings on Earth.

Never saw him again.

UFO technology doesn't seem to be much more advanced from ours. Sure anti-gravity and after the light (both assumed). However, reported UFO crashes in the 1800s, mentioned sale, propellor and such. In the 1950s UFOS were tracked by radar. They didn't have stealth technology? That's a problem.
The second problem is time and distance. Why do aliens come light years to run around doing anal probes? Worse, is why now. Arthur C. Clake onced used the Empire State Building to represent the age of the earth. Using this, one inch equals a million years. Using this, like fed doesn't appear in the first two thirds of the building. Then, life is mainly one celled slime. At the top of the TV tower, place a fair sized book. That's the age of man. Ontop of the book place a dime. That's how long we've been civilized. To repress the Inductrial Revolution to today, use a stamp.
For most of the planets history, there was no life and then no advanced life. To have UFOs show up now means hitting one stampe in 1,454 feet of stamps.

When I first posted, the show had an interview with Erich von Däniken running. I remember reading his stuff as a kid, being fascinated for a while, and then throwing the bullshit flag and giving the entire idea a 15-yard penalty.

A little while ago, the show had moved on to Giorgio A. Tsoukalos, of the "It's ALIENS" meme fame.

It's like watching Mystery Science Theater 3000, sans robots. All I need is some popcorn.

It's funny how all aliens crash far away from all populated areas. They're so considerate not to crash into our buildings and homes.

Floating-point arithmetic.

quote:

OK, if these aliens are really rocket scientists, how come they manage to run into a planet?

How can a destroyer crash into a tanker? I suspect that the scientists aren't driving the saucer.

My second favorite (after the late Don Martin) Mad magazine artist, Sergio Aragonés, did "A Mad Look at Space Aliens." One of the cartoons showed the aliens locked out of their flying saucer and trying to get into it with a coat hanger.

At least when they start playing with us we can learn more about Operation Highjump and Die Glocke. They should have better gossip than we do and hopefully they don't have any Space Kardashians.

People want to believe, why argue.

Like aliens have nothing better to do than doodle in the corn fields. It drives the locals nuts.

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Originally posted by jljones:
You know the last guy in medical school is still called doctor. Same has to go with space alien pilots.

You dont want to send your best and brightest on what could be a suicide mission.

quote:

Originally posted by braillediver:
People want to believe, why argue.

Like aliens have nothing better to do than doodle in the corn fields. It drives the locals nuts.

After a long study of the locals and getting ready to head home... I could see myself doing that, just for giggles.

quote:

Originally posted by gpbst3:

quote:

Originally posted by jljones:
You know the last guy in medical school is still called doctor. Same has to go with space alien pilots.

You dont want to send your best and brightest on what could be a suicide mission.

Bloody well roight!

You send the telephone sanitizers, hairdressers, TV producers, insurance salesmen, personnel officers, security guards and management consultants.

quote:

Originally posted by RichardC:

quote:

Originally posted by gpbst3:

quote:

Originally posted by jljones:
You know the last guy in medical school is still called doctor. Same has to go with space alien pilots.

You dont want to send your best and brightest on what could be a suicide mission.

Bloody well roight!

You send the telephone sanitizers, hairdressers, TV producers, insurance salesmen, personnel officers, security guards and management consultants.

Management consultants, I've seen one of those in the wild. Biggest bullshitter I've ever seen.
LOL

quote:

Originally posted by whanson_wi:
A little while ago, the show had moved on to Giorgio A. Tsoukalos, of the "It's ALIENS" meme fame.

It's like watching Mystery Science Theater 3000, sans robots. All I need is some popcorn.

My mom is a true believer in these type programs, and that guy is her pope!