It's... a very long story, but the punchline is, my old man finally got arrested yesterday in Greensburg, PA. Or at least, he's in Greensburg, at Westmoreland County Prison, in B unit. That much, I was able to find out. The Pennsylvania State Troopers called my mother in New York looking for him for showing up to a doctor's appointment drunk and high, and didn't know he'd already been arrested yesterday. I can't find a booking charge, but if I had to guess, it was DUI on top of possession of marijuana on top of (according to my mother) expired inspection, expired plates, and a suspended license.

We've all been trying to get him to quit for years. He has been frozen out of my life for five years and my sister followed suit two years ago. My mother is fiddle-fucking around with divorce. I was planning to fly out to New York on the weekend of the 19th and 20th to talk to him and try to get him into a rehab. Instead, I opted to accept an offer for a second job at a local in-patient rehab working with alcoholics and addicts directly and I start next weekend.

This afternoon, my mother and I called the few friends and family we suspect would still have anything to do with him and all have agreed not to bail him out of prison for any reason, because he'll simply drink himself to death. I called the prison and spoke to the nurse for that unit and informed her that he's an end-stage alcoholic showing al the visible signs of cirrhosis, third stage for sure and quite possibly fourth, and that if he hasn't told them that, they need to watch him for DT's.

He needs to hit bottom. He can either choose to start sobering up and accept the absolute mess he's made of his life, or he can blow inmates for toilet wine. His choice. I don't really give a fuck, but I feel like I need to try to help lead him to sobriety if I can. Anyone working in law enforcement or recovery in Pennsylvania who would like to help give me some information, it would be much appreciated. Specifically, I would like to know what he got popped for, how long he's likely to be in there, and where I can eventually get him into an in-patient that he can't just waltz out of, because he's really slick and totally fully of shit. Thanks in advance.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: P220 Smudge,

Rough going for you and your family, but good on you for trying to get him some help.

Have you tried plugging in information on an arrest record database like this one -

https://www.peoplewhiz.com/la/...mEAAYAyAAEgJjt_D_BwE

Not sure if legit (or ‘free’) but it may be worth a shot.

PM sent.

220, sorry for your issues with your dad.

20 years dealing with very similar challenges with my younger brother. Multiple DUI's, can't keep a job, driving without a license, etc.

One day he says he had an "awakening". He has been been stone cold sober for 6 months. no intervention or assistance. Odd but I'll take it.

Best of luck.

If your behavior don’t change your environment will.

quote:

Originally posted by DennisM:
PM sent.

THANK YOU! Replied!

quote:

Originally posted by Graniteguy:
One day he says he had an "awakening". He has been been stone cold sober for 6 months. no intervention or assistance. Odd but I'll take it.

My old man was dry six years following an arrest for being drunk at a bar with a gun... undercover. So he says. Yep, he was a Border Patrolman and then Anti-Smuggling. He retired and decided he could drink again. Now this. I highly suggest AA for your brother. Going it alone, white-knuckle can happen, but it isn't a recipe for success long-term. Dry drunk sucks, and being around dry drunks really sucks.

quote:

Originally posted by Graniteguy:
Best of luck.

Thank you.

quote:

Originally posted by Imabmwnut:
If your behavior don’t change your environment will.

That's no shit! I like that. Stolen.

P220 we just buried my wife's sister for exactly this type of situation. You can love someone, but you cannot change them. Prayers for your family.

All I can say is wishing you & the family the best. It’s nice that some care, then again, people do what they do.

Sometimes jail is the perfect place to be for someone in addiction or suffering from mental illness because its the one place they might receive the help they need. There is a faith based recovery ministry that works with people in prison and inmates coming out of prison and I'm certain they can provide resources for you to figure out what to do next. Here is there contact info:

Liberty Ministries

610-287-5481

www.libertyministries.us

Hope this helps

Tough break for the family. In this modern world, some people are genetically set for a train wreck. Take away booze, drugs, material belongings, societal 'wants and needs', put these folks in a small village 3,000 years ago, and they'd be fine, upstanding members of the community.

I have a 'special' credit card for the day my dad DEMANDS I show up at XYZ to bail out an older brother [it is not a matter of 'if', but 'when', for this sibling]. This credit card has a credit line of $2,000. That's it. Promises of repayment mean nothing, and two G's is all I'm prepared to walk away from.

^^^^

I would take a closed card. When it is rejected I would shrug shoulders and walk away.

I use to bail out my brother, he always paid me back but I was tired of the hassle. I finally told him to not call me anymore, I was done.
To the best of my knowledge he has never been arrested since. He hasn't called me!

I find it hard he would be held in jail for any length of time for only a DUI, especially with “COVID”. They usually have a sober person pick you up and you get paperwork in the mail. At the most I think he would have be arraigned at the jail and released on a bond most likely non monetary.

You can try this site. Not sure how soon it is updated.

https://ujsportal.pacourts.us/CaseSearch

quote:

Originally posted by sourdough44:
All I can say is wishing you & the family the best. It’s nice that some care, then again, people do what they do.

Same here P220. God bless you for continuing to care.

God Bless you and prayers for the family

email sent as well.

I can't offer any meaningful help.

Good luck to you. I'll keep you in my thoughts.

I understand.
I'm very allergic to alcohol too. If I drink I'll usually break out in handcuffs.
I've been able to kick it and can very happily accept that I can and will not ever drink again. I just wish I knew how to get others to see and feel how I do.
Best of luck to your old man and your family.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Ryanp225,

quote:

Originally posted by Ryanp225:
I understand.
I'm very allergic to alcohol too. If I drink I'll usually beak out in handcuffs.
I've been able to kick it and can very happily accept that I can and will not ever drink again. I just wish I knew how to get others to see and feel how I do.
Best of luck to your old man and your family.

Never heard that expression before. Entirely appropriate.

My best wishes to the OP. Good luck. I will remember your father in prayer.

If you think it will help, talk to the ADA handling his case. Sometimes, they can be persuaded not to plea out perps which “need” jail time.

Also, there’s lots of NA/AA outreach programs for prisoners.