OK, guys, that's enough

Kevbo, I think it’s really great that you have put your kids above everything. Taking the middle road and trying to keep politics out if sports is a great plan.
Your email was very well written and I think it conveyed your point rather well.
Don’t be too hard on yourself for not seeing it happening until it was almost over. Sounds like you were pretty busy with the other kiddo and getting her squared away.

Kevbo, my kid played soccer for many years in an organization that sounds similar to yours, so I understand the situation you are in as far as wanting to maintain cordial relationships and opportunities for your kid to continue to play. And I can empathize with your outrage. But I think you are going to have some tough decisions to make depending on the response you get to your email. Let's assume the ref was in fact forcing a political demonstration. If the response from the coaches or other leaders of the club is along the lines of "what's the big deal?" what are you prepared to do about it? Maybe it's all a misunderstanding and it will be a non-issue, but if it's not, and the rest of the parents in the club don't share your justifiable outrage, where does that leave you and your son?

The OP was made after the email had already been sent. The Original Poster has already taken action and formed and sent his response to the incident described. I don’t see any value in supporting or findinding fault with a descision that is all ready been made and does not effect anyone who is responding. The toothpaste is already out of the tube and it’s not anyone’s bathroom but the Kevbo’s.

quote:

Originally posted by bigwagon:

This is a great post.

I’ve been thinking about the OP most of the day. I read it early this morning and waited a while to post so I could chew on it. I’m fortunate that where I coached for most of my time, and where I coach now are both very conservative areas.

Only Kevbo knows his kid and his maturity level. Only Kevbo understands the league he’s in, and the options available to him to play elsewhere.

By 14 you as a parent should know how serious soccer is to your kid. Meaning, you know if he’s got a shot at making money at it, be it a scholarship to college or a career playing or coaching. My 13 year old doesn’t. He still plays and is a starter but he’s not going to play football or baseball past high school. He simply doesn’t have the desire or the talent to do so. For him it’s just fun. Archery he is actually really good at, but again his heart just isn’t in it enough to put in the time. He loves sports but he’s more of a bookworm and spends more time on academics than sports. I know this and if I were in your shoes that would matter. Your kids soccer future should, and I’m sure does, matter to you.

Also at 14 your kid should be mature enough to have a conversation with about this. If he’s not, maybe this helps get him that mature. I disagree that you or the coach should protect him from making that decision. At 4, yes. At 14, no. As a youth coach I care about the development of my kids as both players, and as people. I am not in it to win games. I’m in it to build young men and women both on and off the field. And I’ve got a lot of championship trophies to prove I build teams correctly. If the league condones continued kneeling I think you should talk to your kid. Hopefully he does not want to kneel. Encourage him not to. He may get backlash, but is that a bad thing? Is it bad that he learns to stand (literally in this case) for his beliefs?

At 14 the stakes are typically low. IMO you are better off letting them learn when the stakes are low. Don’t wait until they are high.

My kid would not be back. Damn these people.

quote:

Originally posted by kramden:
My kid would not be back. Damn these people.

Indeed. Going back shows a boy at that age that our principles are for sale.

Because kneeling is an effective tool to cleanse the hearts of men.

Kevbo:

A rational, studied response to a difficult situation. You have my sincere admiration and respect.

Tillman

Luckily, my kids wouldn’t have to be told not to engage in that silly shit. They would have stood on their own. They might have even said something like “sorry, that’s racist; ALL lives matter”.

Interested to find out if and how the club responds, probably ought to put the tournament hosts on notice, if the guy is doing this in your game,

I"m sure he's got other games to ref during the tournament so there ought to be a lot more agitated parents, if he did this in other games, if not then why just this one time.

If this was the first game and one time maybe someone got his attention after the game...

I'd guess one dumb ref decided to take this action.

quote:

Originally posted by SigLaw:
You were much more reserved then I would have been. I would have been furious (I know you are too). You handled yourself well. I agree this had to be addressed.

Good luck!

Me too. I think...no I know I would have grabbed my son and told him not to.
My son probably would not have anyway, I raised him speaking to him about politics all his life.

Monday morning quarterbacks...

Kevbo I could not have handled that situation nearly as well as you.

Like collages teaching how to over throw but not teaching how to have respect.
Not going in a direction that works well for young minds. IMO

quote:

Originally posted by Nickelsig229:
Monday morning quarterbacks...

Kevbo I could not have handled that situation nearly as well as you.

What Nickelsig229 said..

quote:

Originally posted by Cliff:

What Nickelsig229 said..

And I'll echo that as well.

Agreed. Kevbo you handled that well. Travel soccer starts here on Saturday and I'm praying we don't have the same thing happen.

I don't believe politics belong in sports.

I'm curious to hear the response.