A blonde and a brunette were roommates.
Brunette: Shit. My BF just sent me a dozen long-stemmed red roses.
Blonde: Shouldn't that make you happy?
Brunette: I just don't want to spend the next three days with my legs in the air.
Blonde: Don't we have a vase somewhere?

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead were in the OB/GYN office waiting room. The brunette went in, came out, and said, "Yay! We're gonna have a girl, cause we did it missionary style." The redhead went in, came out, and shouted, "Yay! We're gonna have a boy, cause I rode on top!" The blonde burst into tears. "What's wrong, honey?" the redhead asked. The blonde replied, "We're gonna have puppies!"