^^^^ Oh now that's great!

Sorry your dad died, here's a great big basket of heart disease and diabetes for you!

Totally inappropriate in my book, the gift basket and asking for money

Sorry your dad died, here are some pretzels.

The fact that it's presumably a request a) by a manager several levels "upstream" for you and b) FOR a manager one or more levels upstream from THAT?

"Good morning, General. The birthday party for President-for-Life Duvalier is tomorrow. You will be contributing to the gift, of course? All of the other generals have already given generously and we'd hate to have to report that you were the only one NOT contributing."

Bullshit on that.

I see nothing wrong with an appropriate "memorial" gift between close friends (for example, a few of us managed to track down & reprint a photo of a friend and his dad that one of us took at a BBQ thirty years ago. Buddy had few pics of his dad and almost none of the two of them together.)

But shakedowns at work? Nah, bruh. Unprofessional and reeks of leg-riding extortion. Add in baby shower "collections," wedding "collections," "They're quitting and their last day is xxx" collection, and you've identified better than 3/4 of the requests I get at work for money from people who--as already noted in this thread-- are co-workers, not friends. The last 1/4 are the kids-selling-stuff ones, which are a whole different rant.

quote:

Originally posted by Krazeehorse:
I never heard of a bereavement gift before this thread.

Same.

I am confused. The thread title says boss's boss's boss. Did the guy that died work for your company, or was it the father of someone who worked for the company? If the guy that died did not work for the company, I don't see how this is even remotely appropriate.

ETA: I re-read it, sounds like it's the boss's boss's boss's father, lol. Isn't that like someone's boss's father three times removed? LOL.

Yeah it’s the father of someone that works for the company. The person that works for the company is 3 levels higher than me. I know him. I’m in meetings with him and he interacts with us all somewhat regularly. But certainly not enough for this type of thing. Especially since the flowers the company pays for would state it was from his entire organization. I see no reason to do more. Consider also that there are now 4 other departments that likely didn’t send something separate. It’s just not the appropriate thing to do.

Instead of cookies, how about an urn? Or a cake with no candles?

Just no.

I wouldn't send or contribute shit.

The Army always tries to shake people down for retirement or PCS awards. It wasn't my fucking idea to spend money on a plaque or whatever, don't ask me for money.

I work in a union shop and it’s customary for all to sign a card and buck up for flowers if a coworker has a death in the family. The company does the same and if the funeral is local they allow anyone to attend briefly.