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| Ugly Bag of Mostly Water  |
"Those parents" never think they are “one of those" parents. Endowment Life Member, NRA • Member of FPC, GOA, 2AF & Arizona Citizens Defense League | |||
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| Member |
I know a lot of you guys aren't fans of "sportsing". That being said the Greeks and the Service Academies have gotten one thing right. Well Rounded is a good thing. I don't give a shit how far you can throw a ball if you can't read at an appropriate level. It also doesn't mean as much if you can articulate theoretical arguments but you can't walk without tripping over your shoe laces. The sweet spot is a balance of mental and physical abilities. Society will always have a spot for the top end mental faculty types and top end physical specimens but for the bulk of the rest of us, striving to have a modicum of both mental and physical skills is a good spot to be in. Sports at this age are only ruined by one thing. Yup, the adults. Let them sports. You still learn valuable things even if you suck. | |||
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Spread the Disease |
THIS. Many parents put their kids into sports so they can try them. You get one season of seeing them not try or give a damn, and they don't come back next season. It's why my son only did T-ball once. ________________________________________ -- Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past me I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain. -- | |||
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Void Where Prohibited |
My first question would be: Is this a competitive league or an 'everybody plays' league? If the latter, move to the competitive league where all the kids have some level of skill. "If Gun Control worked, Chicago would look like Mayberry, not Thunderdome" - Cam Edwards | |||
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| Savor the limelight |
When your kid gets good, you won’t have to worry about the dud kid. Or maybe you will because at some level, your kid is the dud kid. I’ve signed my kids up let them sign up for a variety of activities. They’ve been good and duds at a variety of activities. I’ve got two rules: 1. Do the best you can and 2. Finish what you start. Example: my daughter tried swimming when she was 8. She did the best she could, she swam the whole season, and she asked if she had to keep swimming. Nope and that’s OK. She has plenty of other interests that she is really good at. My oldest has been swimming for years now. He wanted to quit mid-season a few times, but stuck it out and always signed up for another season. He’s trying to figure out how to keep swimming in college now. The school he’s going to doesn’t have a team. | |||
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| Member |
Hey, I was that Dud kid at one point. They stuck me out in Right Field where nothing ever happens so I'd get to day dreaming or trying to stomp grass hoppers or any other crawly bug. The coach caught on pretty quick and put me at Catcher. Now that's a spot where you had to participate on every single play. It also helped that I had enough arm to reach second base. The second time I beaned the pitcher he was instructed to hit the dirt anytime he saw me stand up with the ball in my right hand and winding up. I've stopped counting. | |||
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| Member |
If you wait long enough we all become the dud kid. I am a pretty good athlete, not great but good. Never the pick last kind of guy. Now though I play basketball at church every Monday. There is one guy older than me that plays and the majority are in their 20's. I have gotten used to being picked last. lol. I am the dud now. My mom still loves me though. | |||
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| Peace through superior firepower  |
The games are for the kids, and no one else. A story I've never told- I guess, yeah, I must have been nine or so, playing right field for my school baseball team. Looking back now, I can't remember if I even wanted to play, or if my parents urged it, or I just went along with my friends. Certainly, there were better choices to field than little Para. I didn't really care about the game. As usual, we had a couple of little superstars on the team- a pitcher and whoever. Anyway, I recall one game in particular. I'm standing out there, bored to shit, thinking about traveling in a spaceship or a submarine, watching the birds fly over, whatever. The inning ends. My mom is there, helping with refreshments. I guess I embarrassed her. I went over to her and she bent down like she was going to open an ice chest to dole out sodas and asked me what I thought I was doing, letting that ball roll past me and not even flinching, staring off into space. I guess she thought some of the other parents thought her son was a half-wit.  I understand, really, I do, and if I had a bit of perspective, I would have kicked it into gear and been Charley Hustle, and made mom proud. But, damn, guys, I just didn't care. It didn't matter to. It was just a game to me. I played all sorts of games back then. I may have been a dud at baseball, but get me in the classroom and I was an allstar. Next time you see some spastic little kid giving away the game to the opposing team, consider the possibility that he might rather be in his room, reading, or engaged in some other cerebral activity outdoors, like collecting moths, or building a fort in the woods with his friends; things that don't require a uniform, and where the parents don't feel the need to be. | |||
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| Leatherneck |
Yup. And you can learn things if you don’t suck and someone on your team does. And you can learn things if you all suck and if you all don’t. I get that you want them to win. I wanted every team I’ve ever coached to win. But I always remembered that youth sports isn’t about winning, it’s about teaching lessons that will help the kids on and off the field for the rest of their lives. My absolute favorite game ever was a Super Bowl loss when I coached a 6 year old team. Yeah I’d have rather we’d have won, but I think the kids got more out of the loss. “Everybody wants a Sig in the sheets but a Glock on the streets.” -bionic218 04-02-2014 | |||
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| Member |
I coached little league football and basketball. The kids who didn't perform at the level of their peers seemed as though they didn't want to be there but there parents were adamant about them participating. Side story, one of "my" underperforming kids ended up being starting quarterback for his HS state champion football team. Desire to play is everything. | |||
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| Don't burn the day away |
One of those “kids” cost our little league team and me as the pitcher a little league championship. I remember the fly ball to right that should have been caught but it wasn’t. By the time he got the ball and missed the cutoff it was a home run and we lost 2-1. There was man on base that I walked so I was culpable as well. I remember being angry and crying and I remember my father “ our coach” pulling me aside and telling me he didn’t do it on purpose and no one feels worse than that kid and to man up show some balls and that it wasn’t the end of the world even though it sure seemed like it. That kid ended up being one of my best friends and we’re still friends 50 plus years later. He remembers the play and says he was not paying attention and got caught by surprise, he was a catcher and got stuck in right field and was bored. | |||
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Member |
Sometimes Scotty Smalls just needs a Benny “The Jet” Rodrigues to help him out. You don’t know what’s going on with his home life. Demand not that events should happen as you wish; but wish them to happen as they do happen, and you will go on well. -Epictetus | |||
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| Don't burn the day away |
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Member |
Karma is a bitch, when your kid reaches an age or league where he is the "dud" you'll change your tone on it I'm sure. 10 years to retirement! Just waiting! | |||
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| Member |
What have you done to help the kid get better? Talk to him? Explain the game? Live pitch the kid??? Step up or stop complaining. You are the problem not the kid. | |||
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| I Am The Walrus |
As a parent, it can be tough balancing kids activities. While you don't want to force your kid to participate in the activity, you also don't want to let them quit for no apparent or little reason. Where does the line get drawn? My daughter, for instance, she does kickboxing 2 times a week and each session is 45 minutes. She's only 8 and been going for 2-3 months so they're still on the 1-2 and kick phase. She's not sparring, nowhere near ready for that. She goes first and then my wife and I attend the adult class after the kids class. My daughter sometimes enjoys kickboxing and definitely enjoys the time after her class hanging out with the other kids whose parents are participating in adult class. She's even said, "I love going to kickboxing" and other days its, "I don't like kickboxing." I don't want to force her to do something she will absolutely resent but I also don't want her to just quit. _____________ | |||
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| Member |
I coached little league for a few years. I've had some kids that I thought could go all the way to the show. I had a few "duds" as you put it. At the 9 year old level, I made practice about fundamentals. I would make buddy pairs and have each player coach the other. I got good results when the "duds" would teach a batting stance or a grounder stance. That's when it usually clicks for them after they think about it. Beagle lives matter. | |||
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| Eye on the Silver Lining |
This is hard. The fear is teaching them to be a quitter. We all want follow through. I get it. We are teaching two different things one follow through and Two if it’s not for you, then we don’t need to do it.. ETA: I struggled for the first few years to get my son in his hockey gear, and this year is the first he’s gone into the locker room alone, dressed out, tied his own skates, and hustled onto the ice without any prompting. He turned 11 this year, and was doing everything but tying his own skates for the last couple years. If your kiddo wants to do it, they’ll get there. But as you say, do they really want to, or are they doing it to please us…. Eg, now we are down to 2 practices left in this current hockey camp, a few kids are starting to be dicks, and my kid is ready to bow out. Do I let him, or make him finish out the camp (month long). It sucks putting him into this position, but we are almost there, dang it.This message has been edited. Last edited by: irreverent, __________________________ "Trust, but verify." | |||
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Snackologist |
That's just harsh to call a kid a "dud". You are an adult. You wrote this kid off even before he had a chance. What if someone wrote you off early in life? Since you are such an expert. How about you offer to train the young lad up? To much for you? Then don't complain. ...You, higher mammal. Can you read? ....There's nothing sexier than a well worn, functional Sig! | |||
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Honky Lips |
That's my take as well. | |||
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