Yesterday was a very busy day for my family. In addition to school and work, my son had belt testing in Taekwondo. My daughter had a chorus concert that started an hour after belt testing. My wife invited her father and step mother to travel to our town to attend these events. Well of course, these dear old folks can't drive after dark, so I was put on Boomer duty. It was my job to pick them up from their hotel and drive them to the events and back again. We invited them to stay at our house, but Gramps likes to stay at hotels.
So I live about 20 miles from the beach. You guessed it, Gramps booked a room on the beach because it's off season and he can get a rate. This means I have to leave work early and drive 20 miles to the beach for pickup at 4:15 to make it to testing by 5.
As soon as I pick them up, Gramps is asking if we are going to go out to eat first. I remind him of the schedule that my wife had already sent him in detail that we had back to back events and probably wouldn't be done until 9pm. Oh Gramps starts fussing about his blood sugar and he needs to eat. I call the wife and tell her that I am stuck in traffic and I ask her to get Gramps and Step-Grandma some food. So at this point my wife and Gramps are negotiating about what to get and how exactly were they supposed to eat in the car. You can imagine I'm sure.
So we get to testing and find chairs in the observing area. Gramps pulls out this camera with the hubble telescope as a lens. He goes behind the judges table and I suppose he wants to stand there and take pictures. The instructor tells him he has to go back to his seat and remain there. Testing goes fine, my son earns his Chetah belt and so now we are off to my daughter's chorus concert. Gramps starts complaining in the car about "I don't know why that guy wouldn't let me stand there, I was just trying to take pictures."
We get to the high school and there is a basketball game and a soccer game going on at the same time, so parking is full. Step-Grandma starts talking about her knee and she forgot her handicap pass. I tell them that I will drop them off at the front entrance and I will go park. Gramps starts asking his wife if she knows where to go. I say, look Dad, just hang out at the entrance and I will find you.
I park the car and head to the entrance and I have lost my Boomers. They didn't hang out like I asked. I start looking around and I see Gramps sitting in the bleachers with popcorn watching the basketball game. I try to go in to fetch him but a lady asks for my ticket. I don't have a basketball ticket, I'm just trying to herd my Boomers. The lady lets me past and I tell Gramps that we are down the hall at the auditorium. Can I bring my popcorn? Sure.
So after the hour and a half joint concert with chorus and band, we meet up in the hallway and everyone is tired and wants to go home. My wife says and she was right, that since they traveled and time was short, that we should go to the ihop for a late dinner. We get to the ihop at around 9:30 and of course there is one waitress an probably one cook. We weren't the only people from the high school events that decided to go to the ihop. It was a bit crazy. Gramps gave the poor waitress hell. He wanted a diet caffeine free soda and didn't understand why they didn't have it. Then he didn't understand why his omelet didn't come with both pancakes and hashbrowns. I finally looked at the waitress and said "bring both". She and I understood each other that if she could be done with Gramps, her night would be instantly better. So dinner takes a long time and my wife's mom and her husband were at dinner. Gramps starts in with remember when stories with my wife's mom and you could tell the two step-spouses were annoyed. It's after 10 and my 6 year old son is drowsy and doesn't want to answer Gramps questions and Gramps gets annoyed. My daughter is texting me from across the table saying she wants to go home because she has school and a second show the next day.
Finally, I get the Boomers back in the car and we head to the beach. Gramps is talking trash about my wife's sister's husband. This makes me realize that Gramps probably talks trash about me. We get to the hotel and I am ready to bail when step-Grandma says: I have presents in the hotel room for the children. It's like midnight at this point. I take a bellman's cart and go load up the presents. I drive 20 miles home and the kids are asleep. I unload the presents and I go collapse on the bed. My wife comes in and says: "I met the boy that has a crush on our daughter." My daughter is 17 and hasn't had a boyfriend yet. She's beautiful but kids these days are dating less. I'm too tired to talk to the wife about it, so I zonk out.
The end.

quote:

I'm just trying to herd my Boomers.

It’s better than herding cats but not by much.

Ha ha

So far my parents that are in their mid 80's get around just fine and don't do stupid shit

My wife has to keep me from doing stupid shit tho, 55 and on the way to Boomer hood

As my Dad once said to me after I showed irritation to him one day:

“Someday you’ll be old too!”

I try to have patience with my aging parents and hope someday my children will do the same with me.

Oh.

By the title I thought you were chaperoning Oklahoma's football team or, on the USS Alabama.

quote:

Originally posted by LS1 GTO:
Oh.

By the title I thought you were chaperoning Oklahoma's football team or, on the USS Alabama.

Yeah, I though "Oh cool, a submarine story!" Always been fascinated by submarines....

I thought "Baby Boomer" and then "I are one."

The behavior you describe is characteristic of Generation X.

The hell you say, you young snapperwhipper.

Pull up your damned pants!

Okay I stopped at “picked them up from a hotel” they don’t stay with you.

Hold my beer…… I gotcha on this one

I finally read through the whole thing.... I like my original reply better.

You're leaving out details, there has to be more to it than what you wrote.

Did he forget his cane at any point? I too thought submarines were going to be the topic.

I have four kids: three teenagers and one octogenarian. The oldest has the best toys though.

This is one of the funniest posts ever on Sigforum. Almost chack chack in awesomeness. Well done!

^You just made my work day. Thanks mate.

I'm a Boomer. If you think dealing with Boomers is hard you never dealt with "The Greatest Generation" That is the group my Parents came from.
After they lived through WW1, WWII, The Great Depression, Korean War, and Vietnam I found the Greatest Generation easy to deal with, All you ever had to say was "Yes Sir", "Yes Mam"!

Good rant!

That was great.

I have Boomers staying with me Christmas to New Year's and I'm assuming I'll remember this thread 1x or 2x per day.