Okay, I have literally smoked like 4 cigars in my life (one of which was a truck stop purchase, so I imagine it wasn't a "good" cigar) but it was my understanding that when lighting a cigar, you do NOT apply the flame directly to the cigar. Yet every movie I ever watch (in this case, The A-Team ) they light cigars with Bics, matches, Zippos, etc with the flame right on the end.

So am I ignorant or is Hollywood just (as usual) perpetuating a bad habit?

Correct, shouldn’t let flame touch the tobacco.

99.9% of the time though, i miss that finer point of lighting them too.

Allow the flame to contact the foot of the cigar to char the bottom and ensure even burn. After the foot is charred continue to light the cigar while holding above the flame.
If using a match to light the cigar, allow the initial flareup to burn off the sulphur before applying to cigar.