So....I literally had this dream last night. Which would kill you the quickest? A lion, a silverback gorilla or a grizzly bear? Which would you have the most chance against if say you had a knife or a gun? Weird I know, but thoughts ?

GO rilla is a killa.

I’d add that all three would be in a killing frenzy as a lowland gorilla might break off an attack if you acted submissive. Of the three I would least want to be attacked by a lion. Cats are dedicated killers and lions specialize in big game 24/7.

A knife would be next to worthless for all three but a bear would likely have the toughest skin/fat layer to get through. Even odds on all 3 with a gun if you’re bold enough to wait for a contact shot to the brain.

Are you having relationship issues?

I would rather face 2 grizzlies than 1 lion.

Which one can run the fastest?

I recall a story about a guy who did kill a grizzly with a Buck 110, so I guess a bear.

I agree that big cats are probably more determined killers than bears.

But, really, none of the above.

quote:

Originally posted by cajunmuscle:
So....I literally had this dream last night...
Which would you have the most chance against if say you had a knife or a gun?

Is it one of those guns in my dreams where the trigger is too heavy to pull to make it fire?

The gorilla is our friend.

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My money is on the Gorilla.

That thing would rip your arm off on accident.
A pissed off gorilla would rip someone to shreds before they knew it.

Don’t get me wrong, neither of the three choices seem like anything pain and suffering and agony for what would be the rest of a short life.

If the bear doesn’t kill you outright, you’re gonna suffer until you do die.
If the lion doesn’t kill you outright, you’re gonna suffer with a real bad infection until you die.

I was once hurt at work and was off for a year. When I was able to return to work I had to work light duty for another year. During that time they assigned me to work security at Lincoln Park Zoo. I became friends with the evening zoo keeper and asked him this very question. What was, in his expert opinion having worked there for some twenty years, the most dangerous animal at the zoo. He said that without question it was the polar bear. He told me that when the bear arrived as a cub that he fed it, played with it, even swam with it. Then one day when he arrived to work he said every thing changed. The bear had suddenly gone from a cute, cuddly little creature and became a hunter. He could no longer approach it safely or sit next to it and feed it. Everyday upon waking up the first thing the bear would do is go to the gates and check to see if he could open it which it could not. He also told me that if the bear actually did escape it's enclosure that his only chance of survival was to get to the office and grab one of the large caliber rifles that had there just for that problem. He said that in his expert opinion the bear would hunt him down and kill him. The polar bear was the only animal he truly feared. He had on occasion recovered several other animals that had escaped their enclosures but was able to get them back into their enclosures. I walked the interior of the zoo almost every day and was allowed to go where the general public was not allowed. IMHO, the animal that was the most impressive was the gorilla. He told me that as long as you didn't stare them in the eye they were generally easy to control. I was never impressed by them until I saw them up close. Very close. Another thing I found interesting was the snakes that all of a sudden disappeared. He told me that without fail they would go into the drains. To get them back he would just grab a chair, put it near the drain and eventually the snake would pop it's head up and he would grab it with his snake recovery tool. The time I spent there was very interesting but I wouldn't want to do it again.

The cat would grab your neck and you would be toast pretty quickly. The Bear would start taking chunks of meat off you while still alive. The gorilla might just strike and move on after showing dominance because he wouldn’t be that interested in eating you.

So probably from best to worst
Gorilla
Cat
Bear

Probably prefer to be torn apart by a lion or mauled to death by a grizzly rather than being buttfucked by a giant gorilla, just say'in

What about Sasquatch or a Wookie?

quote:

Originally posted by 1s1k:
The gorilla might just strike and move on after showing dominance because he wouldn’t be that interested in eating you.

I'm also afraid of when the gorilla is horney and want's to assert domminance. THAT's gonna be a bad way to die!

quote:

Originally posted by CPD SIG:

quote:

Originally posted by 1s1k:
The gorilla might just strike and move on after showing dominance because he wouldn’t be that interested in eating you.

I'm also afraid of when the gorilla is horney and want's to assert domminance. THAT's gonna be a bad way to die!

You didn't just happen to watch Trading Places did you?! https://www.youtube.com/shorts/6biU7Ee-RmY

I’d throw poop in their eyes. And I wouldn’t have to reach far to find it.

A wild animal of any size, even deer, would mess up a man in hand to hoof combat. A firearm is a great equalizer but you have to have your head on straight to get a clean well placed shot and even then a lion or bear might kill you before it dies.

Any of them as long as I had a gun. It’s faster than stabbing myself.