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Originally posted by olfuzzy:

quote:

Originally posted by Gustofer:
When someone shows you who they are, believe them.

I couldn't have said it better !

Wish I could take credit for the quote, but it belongs to none other than communist sympathizer Maya Angelou.

Wrong about many things in this world, she did nail this one.

Perhaps helpful:

https://www.investopedia.com/terms/s/six-sigma.asp

Companies are in death spirals as mentioned earlier, but in theory Six Sigma shouldn't be the reason. In practice they may take things to weird extremes though.

So, to play devils advocate. It is very hard to refer someone you know socially, especially if you have not dealt with them professionally, or it has been a long time since you’ve dealt with them professionally.

At times, I have worked for the very wealthy. Social acquaintances have repeatedly tried to leverage that acquaintance into an introduction to capital. (And people I thought of as friends have become acquaintances by doing so.)

This is something that accountants and lawyers deal with on a regular basis, but it is true in all situations. Just because someone may know of a professional opportunity that you desire, does not mean they feel comfortable being responsible for the introduction.

I really think there is no point in asking. Provided that person is aware of the opportunities are seeking I’m sure they will refer you to any for which they feel you’re qualified.

There was a time, many years ago, when I was looking to find a more regular job. The ones the head hunter said I was qualified for, were not the type I wanted.

Sorry to read about this experience. I did see a couple things to double check your assumptions.

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I send her some positions I'm interested in and she says "I don't even know how to refer someone."

Oil & gas had a real nepotism problem when I started my career 25 years ago, but the pendulum swung way too far the other way due to management insistence on layers of isolation to prevent nepotism. Over the years, converting the whole process to digital and more recently offshoring (i.e. located in 3rd world country) a good portion of HR made the layers of isolation even greater. In other words, my company has made "I don't even know how to refer someone" the norm and what your friend is saying passes muster in my world.

On top of all of that, even if a friend or relative manages to get an interview then management will insist I recuse myself from the hiring process. Even as a very senior technical person, I'll still have zero vote on friend or relative. They won't even ask for my feedback in the case of a relative, but would ask for my feedback if the person were a friend. Getting someone in as a Contractor is doable, and then if the work quality is good having multiple people pulling for them when something opens up is the best option I've seen.

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Now these large companies pay referral bonuses.

Is this the case for her employer or an assumption on your part? I work for a large, multinational corporation and we certainly don't do this.

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The point of this is that people will tell you what you want to hear but when you ask them for help, they disappear. And no, I haven't lost her phone number and told her to fuck off. I have a long memory and keep my enemies close.

Why are you wasting even a moment of thought or emotional energy on her at all?

She has shown that she can't be a positive influence in your life so just move on. She is just someone you used to know...

Instead of putting negative energy into thoughts of her, making her your "enemy," focus your energy in a positive way towards things and/or people in your life that are a positive influence.

I am willing to compare heartaches with anyone about careers and trying to move up. And that's with me having two masters (MBA & MS Information Systems) and being objectively smart, book or otherwise. People I worked with early in my career even those who don't have college degrees ended up being directors while I didn't. And I'm talking about medical devices and pharmaceutical companies.

I think focusing on what this person did or didn't do for you is focusing on the wrong things that won't get you closer to your next job unless this is a one-time rant and you've already moved on.

Here's something I can share with you from a book I read called "Swimming with the Sharks." Dig your well before you need to drink from it. How deep of a well (relationship) do you dig with people in your network? I don't know what it means when you say you've kept in touch with the people in your MBA class.

But networking isn't like being in the Mafia where someone gives you a marker "I got you" and a year later, you can turn it in and expect them to be obligated to honor it.

I don't know what the reasons were, maybe she really didn't know how to make referrals and maybe you could have nudged her to see if she can find out. She could have been embarrassed about her job or her company and wouldn't wish it on her worse enemy. I've had a job like that and wasn't able to get out.

But when you said you were going to identify as a black woman, that confirmed to her or to anyone that she dodged a bullet in referring you. I joke a lot but in a business transaction such as this (getting her to help you in your job search), you don't want to give the wrong impression. If she wasn't even going to the trouble of trying to find out how she can refer you, this joke didn't help.

She doesn't know what you're qualified for. You don't know what she knows, you can't read her mind. She might have thought that in a year, you learned how to walk on water. When she sent you the job description that didn't fit you, that was your opportunity to let her know what you are interested in and qualified for.

I know the frustrations involved with job searches and jobs once you get them. It would benefit you more if, at each step, you ask yourself how can I react or be proactive to get me closer to my goal of getting a job.

Good luck.

Be assured that a walk through the ocean of most souls Would scarcely get your feet wet.

I had a similar experience as the OP's, except in reverse.

I went to law school at night. Me and most of my classmates were working full-time jobs in our fields during the day. I worked for a large technology company and one of my law school friends was in health care.

Fast forward a couple of years. This friend calls me. She is out of a job and looking for a new position. Even though she has no technology experience, I work my network within the company, get her an interview for an open attorney position, then lobby for her with the hiring committee.

The word comes back that the company is going to make her an offer, but because she has no relevant experience, it will be as an entry-level attorney at an entry-level salary. I call her and she says 'that's not a problem'.

Imagine my surprise then, when she rejected the company's offer, saying the salary was "insufficient" and that she would only accept if the company increased it significantly. I never spoke to her again after that.

I, and one of my friends, have both received bizarre lowball offers from out of the blue. At times, I think some companies are required to claim that they offered a job to other applicants so that they can give it to someone they wish to give it to.

A little too much alcohol has a way of revealing the true nature of a lot of people.

The duplicity of human beings; the inscrutability of human nature; the vagaries of human interactions. I pity- truly pity- anyone starting their career or looking for a new job or dealing with the unbelievably and unnecessarily convoluted nature of the workplace these days. From putting together a resume, to dealing with PC nonsense and fake pandemics, to simply having a job- all of it is part of one gigantic heap of manure. Things have gotten so screwed up, there's no unscrewing them.

Edmond, when I said it to you before, I guess you thought I was being a smartass, but I say to you in all seriousness- friend, run! Jettison all of it and run. Life is far too short, man. It's easy for me to say, there's no doubt about that, and it's not my life, but, from the things you've posted here about the crap you've put up with in getting through school and searching for work- man, dump all of it. I'm not trying to flatter you when I say I can see that you're intelligent and resourceful, and you can survive and have a fulfilling life without subjecting yourself to this insane meat grinder.

^^^

Listen to that man.

Regarding the Project Management 'stuff', if that's of interest to you, forget the Pimp (PMP), Lean mass or six sigma BS. Get a PM job, entry level or whatever and then figure out which is the Technology craze in your area (or company) and get certified. Get on the Cert Train and that will be more beneficial than a PMP.

Around here, it's all three, Azure, AWS and GCP with Azure and AWS in the lead.