I first met Mike when I was entered in the rifle team of our RAF base in Cambridgeshire, back in 1984. We shared our interest in competitive shooting, and our wives instantly bonded like two sister meeting up again after a long absence from each other. He retired a couple of years before me, but by then we had been living around the corner from each other for a number of years. Their son, a very bright young man, became a highly-regarded aerodynamicist for an up-and coming US manufacturer - a job he still holds, especially as he became a citizen of the US last week.

About four or five years back, Mike began to show a somewhat oddity in manner, breaking off conversations and walking away from groups. He had always been somewhat odd in that regard - his brain must have been rotating like a turbine judging by the masses of learned articles had had published in sundry specialist magazines over many years - but this was different. It got worse, and worse, and then appallingly much more worserer. He was diagnosed as having Lewy-Body dementia, and apart from wishing it on Mr Putin, there is nobody on earth that deserves to end their lives like that.

He went into a care home about ten miles away, and with the added problems of the covid epidemic making visiting extremely problematical, to say the least, he continued in his inexorable disintegration in front of our eyes. His end was terrible but merciful, and he is now out of his struggle for life, although for much of the last six months he had not been compos mentis. His wife has been immensely strong in all of this, and being their friends, we have been doing what we could to ease things for her.

Now he has gone.

Dementia in all its forms is THE most insidious and awful thing that can happen to a sapient being , and coupling it with the violence that goes along with the Lewy-Body form, it is not only fatal, but it leaves the people left behind with the most awful memories of actually seeing their loved ones disintegrate into a drooling wreck of their former self.

I urge you all to support the efforts of the medical research into the causes and, hopefully, an eventual form of relief of this awful condition.

I'll be honest and admit that I've prayed for his peaceful death many times over the last year or so. It might not be MY prayer that has been answered, but all I wanted was for him to be out of his misery.

Very sorry to hear about your friend. As cliche as it sounds at least he is no longer suffering.

Your story sounds very similar to one from our old neighbor. When we first moved into our home our neighbors were immigrants from Italy and were raising their first generation of children here in St. Louis.

He was an engineer by trade, spoke many languages, and was a very brilliant man.

After we were here about five years he also began to disintegrate. He could no longer remember our names,His children’s names, where he was, he would wander out of the house and get lost in all the neighbors would have to search for him. One time he was 1-1/2 miles away.

I think they called his version pics disease?

He ultimately reached a point where his bodies are autonomous systems wouldn’t remember to operate.

For example he would forget how to swallow, to breathe, etc. Disease progressed very rapidly in probably within about a year and a half of diagnosis, if that long, he passed away.

A blessing in disguise for both him and his family as it sounds like for you and Mike.

Tac, so sorry for your loss.

LBD is only recently being diagnosed as compared to Parkinson’s.

Robin Williams had LBD and it was only discovered through autopsy.

Here is a timely article from his widow about this terrible disease. It’s CNN, but relevant.

https://www.cnn.com/2022/07/01...-wellness/index.html

Mornin' Tac. I am so sorry about your friend's passing, and I certainly understand the feelings of relief for him being out of his misery. I've dealt with it as well; there is no manual. It is an insidious disease.

Tac, I and the wife have both worked in hospice. My wife also worked in a dementia ward. You are right in thinking he is better off now. Dementia is a horrible disease. I wish you, your wife, and your friends wife the best after your friends passing.

So sorry to hear about this.

Lewy Body Dementia is indeed a vicious, insidious disease.

At age 75, Chicago Blackhawk legend and Hockey Hall of Famer Stan Mikita was diagnosed with it in January of 2015. Within six months he had lost all memory of his own life and could not recognize anyone, even family members. He passed away three years later.

One person said that watching Mikita go through LBD was like watching everything on a computer hard drive disappear one megabyte at a time.

May he rest in the peace he didn’t have in the later years of his life

Sorry Tac. In a way better place now. May he RIP.

Tac, So sorry for the loss of your friend. We'll say a prayer for his family. RIP

I am sorry for your loss but I am glad it is over for your friend.

Various relatives have had various forms of dementia and it is horrfic/horrible/sickening and also demeaning.

I do not know what version my grandfather had but it took him from being as big and strong as a Draft mule to looking frail and weak like he came out of a prison camp.

I have written about him before in the forum but I spent a lot of time with him growing up. He fought throughout the Pacific Campaign in WW2 in what I would call a Radar/Intelligence/Recon unit.

It was hard to watch him pass.

"I urge you all to support the efforts of the medical research into the causes and, hopefully, an eventual form of relief of this awful condition."

I am very sorry for your loss. I have absolutely no faith in a medical intervention to bring our love ones to us after the cognitive impairment train has left the station. It may ultimately lie in prevention efforts or specific dietary interventions to restore some function. Alzheimer's has been deemed type 3 diabetes. We see how successful medicine has been in "curing" or preventing T2D.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: SigSentry,

Many thanks to you all for your kind words of support. They are greatly appreciated. For obvious reasons I won't be passing them on to the family in any detail, but will be seeing them this evening and giving them the gist of it all.

Thanks again to you all.

sorry for your loss Tac,


I lost my father to Dementia at 71.. 11 years ago

I've seen it several times, working in a mental health/dementia ward of a federal medical prison. I've told myself if I am ever diagnosed with a severe form of dementia, I'll take definitive action to avoid such a horrible end.

I think I agree with Fredward. I had a neighbor who I greatly respected. Dementia caused him to violently assault his wife. In a lucid moment, he was so ashamed of himself, he committed suicide.

Tac, my deepest sympathy.

Lost my Grandmother to Alzheimer's. Took her years to die a slow, debilitating death.
Lost my partner to brain cancer. Early 30's, married, young daughter... Super smart, quick witted, funny... It was a few years for him.
Another good friends mother a few years ago, dementia as well... Years to pass away.

I wouldn't wish that stuff on anyone.

I am sorry and glad he is not suffering.

So sorry for your loss...my condolences to you guys.

Sorry for your loss. I too lost a dear friend at 93 just a few months ago. He acknowledged the end was near, but he lived independently right up until the end. Still it hurt me when he passed so I know the pain.

tac,
I can only imagine, not having thankfully experienced any friends or relatives plagued with this terrible disease.
My heart goes out to you and his family along with prayers.
And yes, prolonged suffering only exacerbates things for everyone so wishing surcease is entirely understandable.