SIGforum
I desperately need help on a VA issue re. recently deceased BIL
March 25, 2025, 04:59 PM
NapoleonSoloI desperately need help on a VA issue re. recently deceased BIL
I will do my best to be succinct.My BIL passed this past Friday at 82. He was in the military and was in Vietnam but did not retire from the Army. His family are trying to set up a military cremation and funeral and while my wife was there (South Carolina) over the weekend, things seemed to be good. Today, she is being told by his family that the VA will not pay for the cremation and funeral because he did not file for "benefits"? They said they would reimburse the cost of the cremation but not pay for it up front. Why wife is beside herself and his family don't have a dime, literally. She gave them money to get by on and I am wondering if they are trying to get us to give them money for the funeral while the government will actually pay for it. My wife said she is just waiting for the call for money. My wife has not talked to the VA as his "family" said they would take care of it. Where do I go for information or does someone here know what I am missing? I was in the military as was my father and I have not filed for any "benefits" or maybe that is a Vietnam era benefits package. Thanks in advance for your help everyone. P.S. I travel for work and can't get to the VA until Friday.
“Our actions may be impeded...
But there can be no impeding our intentions or our dispositions. Because we can accommodate and adapt. The mind adapts and converts to its own purposes the obstacle to our acting.
The impeding to action advances action.
What stands in the way becomes the way.”
― Marcus Aurelius
March 25, 2025, 05:05 PM
HRKHere's the VA burial benefits page
Link Burial Benefits Service-connected Death
VA will pay up to $2,000 toward burial expenses for deaths on or after September 11, 2001, or up to $1,500 for deaths prior to September 11, 2001. If the Veteran is buried in a VA national cemetery, some or all of the cost of transporting the deceased may be reimbursed.
Non-service-connected Death
VA will pay up to $978 toward burial and funeral expenses for deaths on or after October 1, 2024 and a $978 plot-interment allowance (if not buried in a national cemetery).
There are several links to the VA regarding this and list of qualifications.
You can apply for a veterans burial allowance and transport online
LinkMarch 25, 2025, 05:10 PM
uvahawkMy condolences for your loss. Recommend you contact the local chapter of the Vietnam Veterans of America in either Indiana or South Carolina. They have chapters in both states. The VVA is dedicated to providing assistance to those who served during the Vietnam War. I believe with their assistance you should be able to file the paperwork with the VA for a burial and headstone in a national cemetery, either in Indiana and South Carolina.
March 25, 2025, 05:19 PM
NapoleonSoloThanks so very much guys. I will work on that tomorrow afternoon. I will go online tonight and see what I can get done there. Thank you for your condolences as well.
“Our actions may be impeded...
But there can be no impeding our intentions or our dispositions. Because we can accommodate and adapt. The mind adapts and converts to its own purposes the obstacle to our acting.
The impeding to action advances action.
What stands in the way becomes the way.”
― Marcus Aurelius
March 25, 2025, 05:46 PM
229DAKDo you (they) have his DD214?
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“A man’s treatment of a dog is no indication of the man’s nature, but his treatment of a cat is. It is the crucial test. None but the humane treat a cat well.”
-- Mark Twain, 1902
March 25, 2025, 05:57 PM
NapoleonSoloI am trying to get all of his docs and see if the DD214 is there. I should have an answer on that in the morning. I should have taken the week off from work but it's a critically busy time and the wife was good to go on her own. That was a bad decision by me by not going. Trying to make up for that now and solve this mess.
“Our actions may be impeded...
But there can be no impeding our intentions or our dispositions. Because we can accommodate and adapt. The mind adapts and converts to its own purposes the obstacle to our acting.
The impeding to action advances action.
What stands in the way becomes the way.”
― Marcus Aurelius
March 25, 2025, 06:00 PM
ZSMICHAELThe VA is pretty overwhelmed at present. If you cannot get through to them your Congressional rep will know as they all have someone who takes care of Veterans matters.
March 25, 2025, 06:27 PM
NapoleonSoloZSMICHAEL thanks for the heads up. I have a busy afternoon ahead tomorrow and will update everyone. I has such deep respect for everyone on the forum. I am here every day and generally don't post a lot. Thank you all for your advice this evening.
“Our actions may be impeded...
But there can be no impeding our intentions or our dispositions. Because we can accommodate and adapt. The mind adapts and converts to its own purposes the obstacle to our acting.
The impeding to action advances action.
What stands in the way becomes the way.”
― Marcus Aurelius
March 25, 2025, 06:28 PM
LS1 GTOSome times the Red Cross can help guide too.
Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
"If dogs don't go to Heaven, I want to go where they go" Will Rogers
The definition of the words we used, carry a meaning of their own...
March 25, 2025, 06:54 PM
captain127Find a veterans service officer ( most VFW’s DAV’s and American Legions have one or can get contact info) they are very good about expediting this sort of stuff. My post in AZ has a commander who is a retired VSO and helps guide a lot of people through the process
March 25, 2025, 07:22 PM
NapoleonSoloThanks very much for the info! I am so thankful for the help and advice.
“Our actions may be impeded...
But there can be no impeding our intentions or our dispositions. Because we can accommodate and adapt. The mind adapts and converts to its own purposes the obstacle to our acting.
The impeding to action advances action.
What stands in the way becomes the way.”
― Marcus Aurelius
March 25, 2025, 09:07 PM
armmeContact Casualty Assistance at Ft. Jackson:
Fort Jackson CAC hours of operations are Monday – Friday, 0730 -
1700 (Eastern Standard Time). Telephone: 803-751-4519 or
803-751-7980
CAC is Casualty Assistance Center
March 25, 2025, 10:42 PM
Redleg06South Carolina Department of Veterans' Affairs phone number is: 1-803-734-0200 or go to scdva.sc.go
"Cedat Fortuna Peritis"
March 26, 2025, 09:41 AM
220-9erSorry to hear of your loss and it's nice of you to care enough to help them. I'd don't have any VA info but have seen similar situations before.
Given the family situation you describe and the relatively low cost of a cremation, You might just pay for that now (directly to the funeral home) and punt on the funeral or Celebration of Life part and see where that goes.
There could be a lot of additional storage costs otherwise that don't add anything good to this situation.
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March 26, 2025, 01:19 PM
NapoleonSoloI am going to pay for the cremation and will file for reimbursement from the VA. I am making progress with this mess and I am glad I am in a position to help financially.
“Our actions may be impeded...
But there can be no impeding our intentions or our dispositions. Because we can accommodate and adapt. The mind adapts and converts to its own purposes the obstacle to our acting.
The impeding to action advances action.
What stands in the way becomes the way.”
― Marcus Aurelius
March 26, 2025, 07:37 PM
sig operatorSorry for the loss of your BIL
Unless you are not worried about the reimbursement by the VA, I would only proceed after the VA acknowledges that it would come direct to you.
March 27, 2025, 05:43 AM
NapoleonSoloI hope to have an answer today on that. Thanks very much for your advice.
“Our actions may be impeded...
But there can be no impeding our intentions or our dispositions. Because we can accommodate and adapt. The mind adapts and converts to its own purposes the obstacle to our acting.
The impeding to action advances action.
What stands in the way becomes the way.”
― Marcus Aurelius
March 27, 2025, 09:38 AM
BKileSo sorry for your loss. You may also reach out to a local VFW Post or an American Legion Post.
Semper Fidelis