I’ve seen a lot of weird and outrageous stuff in the courtroom but yesterday...Wow!

"The designer of the gun had clearly not been instructed to beat about the bush. 'Make it evil,' he'd been told. 'Make it totally clear that this gun has a right end and a wrong end. Make it totally clear to anyone standing at the wrong end that things are going badly for them. If that means sticking all sort of spikes and prongs and blackened bits all over it then so be it. This is not a gun for hanging over the fireplace or sticking in the umbrella stand, it is a gun for going out and making people miserable with." -Douglas Adams

“It is just as difficult and dangerous to try to free a people that wants to remain servile as it is to try to enslave a people that wants to remain free."
-Niccolo Machiavelli

The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all. -Mencken

January 24, 2019, 09:29 AM

rusbro

quote:
Originally posted by BB61:
quote:
Originally posted by rusbro:
quote:
Originally posted by BB61:
there was a sign, in front of the pew

The sign was on the floor, right in front of the pile?

The pile was gone. Over lunch maintenance had come in and cleaned up and everything was drying hence the sign. I heard they had to clean the bench too.

Defendants who are not in custody routinely hack lugies and spit in the elevator the public use but taking a dump in the courtroom, that is a new one for everyone.

Sorry, I was going for double entendre. I should have used bold or italics.

January 24, 2019, 09:33 AM

esdunbar

When I was a young defense lawyer, I was second chairing a trial. As we're about to start jury selection, the client got so nervous that he crapped himself and he had to home to get cleaned up.

Judge said he'd never seen that before, obviously I hadn't either. White guy who was brought up on felony drug dealing and kidnapping charges. This was back in the early 2000's. He was some BS local dealer who thought he was big time. Apparently someone owed him money, so he and his buddies picked the guy up, threw him in the back of his little H2 Hummer and decided to taser him.

It was so funny because everything about this guy was wannabe gangster but you could tell he was a lightweight. My boss was cracking up while we were waiting for him to return. I forget how old he was, but let's call him about 30 ish. It was freaking great.

"I vowed to myself to fight against evil more completely and more wholeheartedly than I ever did before. . . . That’s the only way to pay back part of that vast debt, to live up to and try to fulfill that tremendous obligation."

Alfred Hornik, Sunday, December 2, 1945 to his family, on his continuing duty to others for surviving WW II.

My daughter can deflate your daughter's soccer ball.

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January 24, 2019, 02:25 PM

Georgeair

quote:
Originally posted by Southflorida-law:
Had one pee in court, and one guy tried to jerk off on my trial partner but never something like that.

Well, yeah, almost exactly like that. I don't know what measure of distinction you're using between that level of crazy BS and the OP!

_{You only have integrity once. - imprezaguy02}

January 24, 2019, 03:17 PM

BB61

quote:
Originally posted by Georgeair:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Southflorida-law:

...and one guy tried to jerk off on my trial partner but never something like that.

I had a defendant do that in a felony sex abuse trial a few years ago. I’d forgotten about that (How could I) until you brought your partner’s experience up.

__________________________

January 25, 2019, 09:43 AM

Southflorida-law

quote:
Originally posted by Georgeair:
quote:
Originally posted by Southflorida-law:
Had one pee in court, and one guy tried to jerk off on my trial partner but never something like that.

Well, yeah, almost exactly like that. I don't know what measure of distinction you're using between that level of crazy BS and the OP!

When you are any type of court personnel, State Attorney or Public Defender, for any period of time, "crazy" is every day, Bat-shit crazy is once a week, and then there are the things that really shock even the most jaded court staff! (about once a year)

The really funny thing when you spend a period of time in that system, is when you are at parties with "normal people" and start just randomly telling what happened in court that day.......you get those weird looks and you realize your "normal" is far from their "normal" day.