April 07, 2017, 12:22 PM
DresdenMy friends.... I must take my leave of the forum for a while.
Kevin,
I am really sorry to hear about this. I will say a prayer for you.
April 07, 2017, 12:23 PM
10X-ShooterDamn man, what a sucker punch. I've been there myself. My friends, hobbies, and shooting sports, and my family helped. One of the first things I did was bought a Yamaha bike, drove down to the Florida coast, and rode back and forth along the panhandle coast. Was overtaken by a huge group of riders on Boss Hogs and they invited me to ride with them. It took awhile to heal and I dont think that healing truly started until a woman showed interest in me and I allowed myself to try again. I learned that I'm good on my own and don't
Have to have any one woman in my life although it can be nice. I'll miss your posts as many surely will. If you ever need to talk to someone about this stuff feel free to reach out to me. Sometimes it helps to know that someone has blazed that path before and made it through to the other side.
April 07, 2017, 12:23 PM
Spokane228So sorry. I enjoy your posts and know you have a great many friends here. Don't be afraid to reach out to them.
Good luck.
April 07, 2017, 12:26 PM
grumpy1So sorry to hear. Be safe Kevin and you are in our prayers.
April 07, 2017, 12:29 PM
remsigKeep your head up. We are here for you.
April 07, 2017, 01:00 PM
BytesSending good thoughts your way brother. I've been down the same road. Trust me on this one, there is a very bright light at the end. YOU WILL FIND IT.
April 07, 2017, 01:14 PM
EroBest to you as you deal with this heart wrenching situation. Whatever you do, stay on the high road in all your interactions.
Dan
April 07, 2017, 01:22 PM
2tonicP220I'm very sorry to hear of this, as it hits close to home. My wife of 23 years, thought having a secret BF and destroying two families was A-OK, and left... I'm not exaggerating. In an instant, I was in the presence of a reptile, and her eyes were dead and black. You see this, and you never forget it - Gives me goosebumps just typing this. Worst, most painful chapter of my life, I am still here, and so will you.
I tell you this because your emotions will be all over the place. From sadness and despair so great, you can't believe a human can endure so much pain. Other times a general malaize, other times a rage so white hot, it will startle you. All normal for what you are going through.
In my experience, women, especially wives, just don't "leave", or "need time alone to figure things out", or say "love you, but I'm not in love with you"... They monkey branch, usually have a well planned soft place to land, and many times it is at another dudes place. If so, feelings of killing him, her, or both can be part of the situation, and I admit, I don't know what stopped me.
I learned real quick a person who could do what your wife did to you and me, can do anything, and potentially, you ain't seen nothing yet. She is now a great enemy, and must be treated as such. I'm not on board with adultery, or even running out, as it shows great, irrevocably broken disrespect, and there is no marriage to fix IMO, and experience. Of course, all situations are different, as are people.
During my 5 stages of grief, I had hope early on, it could all be OK again (she never admitted to adultery until 7 months after first lying), but I am so glad I stuck to ridding myself and daughter of this immoral, lying, gas-lighting, foul person. Now she is just a person I knew, who I have sub-zero respect for, and at best, a cold indifference.
I know how tough it is to just stop crying sometimes, to wish anything that it had not happened, to want the pain to stop, to have the world stop from falling out from under you... Believe me, I get it. You must make sure to eat (I lost 40 lb) even if that means nutrition shakes, drink PLENTY of fluids, and I found intense exercise to help me when I needed to clear my head. Looking up at a clear sky filled with stars really helped too; why, I don't know. No shame talking to whoever will listen, and that means seeing a mental health worker too. It will really help you. Avoid drinking/drugs, as it will only feel worse after you come down. If you have kids, they need you, even if you can barley find the strength.
I have helped a lot of guys in your shoes, and if you want to talk on the phone, just email me your number, and let it all out, without judgement. Good luck, and as hard as it is to believe now, you will feel good again, no matter the outcome. I promise. You will see you were far tougher than you ever thought, and no matter the outcome, did it right, with honor and integrity.
April 07, 2017, 01:26 PM
redstonePrayers and kind thoughts for the friend you have been to us. You have my thanks.
April 07, 2017, 01:31 PM
Il CattivoAh, shit, I'm sorry to hear that.
April 07, 2017, 01:40 PM
bobandmikakoVery sorry you have to go through this, and praying for the best in this bad situation.
April 07, 2017, 02:00 PM
smlsigDamn I'm so sorry to hear this.
I wish you all the best going forward...
April 07, 2017, 02:14 PM
Erick85I'm so sorry to hear this Kevin. I'm not too far away from you. If you need anything, shoot me an email. Hang in there.
April 07, 2017, 02:14 PM
lude4lifequote:
Originally posted by KevinCW:
I need to take a break. My wife moved out today...
I am hurt, heartbroken, and scared. I was pretty much blindsided by this and need to get away for a while.
Obviously, if there is anything I can ever do to assist the membership please do not hesitate to contact me via my profile email, but I won't do much other than browse for the near future.
Thanks for all your support and what I am certain to be positive thoughts.
I will return when I can, but for a while at least, I must take my leave.
Kevin
You personally called me when I was going through my divorce a while back. I greatly appreciated that contact.
If you need anything... Someone to listen, talk shit, talk strategy, experience, whatever.. dont hesitate to email me or call.
Shit gets real and fast. Feels like the end, but keep your head up and you will come out a better person. Hang in there brother.
April 07, 2017, 02:16 PM
HK AgStay strong, many of us have been through this. It will get worse likely but it will get better.
HK Ag
April 07, 2017, 02:26 PM
craigcpaWe're here for you Kevin, when you need and are ready. Stay safe and prayers for you and all.
April 07, 2017, 03:41 PM
ulstermanYou are getting pressure from your personal life and work. Don't get caught in the middle. Take a mental health break from work.
April 07, 2017, 03:42 PM
darthfusterI've been thinking about you today, Kevin. One thing that occurred to me is that I hope you know you are not alone...even if sometimes it may feel like it. Most of us are distant, but we all feel this wind blow. I'm sure you can see our concern as you read this thread.