I don't know who writes this stuff. I received it from another bored retiree from our association.

CALLER:
Is this Gordon's Pizza?
GOOGLE:
No sir, it's Google Pizza.
CALLER:
I must have dialed the wrong number. Sorry.
GOOGLE:
No sir, Google bought Gordon’s Pizza last month.
CALLER:
OK. I would like to order a pizza.
GOOGLE:
Do you want your usual, sir?
CALLER:
My usual? You know me?
GOOGLE:
According to our caller ID data sheet, the last 12 times you called you ordered an extra-large pizza with three kinds of cheese, sausage, pepperoni, mushrooms, and meatballs on a thick crust.
CALLER:
OK! That’s what I want.
GOOGLE:
May I suggest that this time you order a pizza with ricotta, arugula, sun-dried tomatoes and olives on a whole wheat gluten-free thin crust?
CALLER:
What? I detest vegetables!
GOOGLE:
Your cholesterol is not good, sir.
CALLER:
How the hell do you know!
GOOGLE:
Well, we cross-referenced your home phone number with your medical records.
We have the result of your blood tests for the last 7 years.
CALLER:
Okay, but I do not want your rotten vegetable pizza! I already take medication for my cholesterol.
GOOGLE:
Excuse me sir, but you have not taken your medication regularly. According to our database, you purchased only a box of 30 cholesterol tablets once, at Drug RX Network, 4 months ago.
CALLER:
I bought more from another drugstore.
GOOGLE:
That doesn’t show on your credit card statement.
I paid in cash.
GOOGLE:
But you did not withdraw enough cash according to your bank statement.
CALLER:
I have other sources of cash.
GOOGLE:
That doesn’t show on your last tax return unless you bought them using an undeclared income source, which is against the law.
CALLER:
WHAT THE HELL!
GOOGLE:
I'm sorry, sir, we use such information only with the sole intention of helping you.
CALLER:
Enough already! I'm sick to death of Google, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp and all the others.
I'm going to an island without an Internet, or cable TV, where there is no cell phone service and no one to watch me or spy on me.
GOOGLE:
I understand sir, but Alexa says you need to renew your passport first. It expired 6 weeks ago.

Google HQ is at 666 Lucifer Lane.....

This type of call may not be far from the truth. At least this is probably part of their vision because the fucktwads that work there probably think this is cool to enable and what we all want.

And why I think like others that Google is the devil and why I minimize my digital and Google footprint.

I talk to millenials about this type of stuff. They are more than happy to give up all privacy for this type of stuff.

Could be a lot of truth in that !

So very true..

Alexa is an Amazon product...

[runs]

Sounds like he called pizza hut.
When you call in, their computer automatically pulls up your name and purchase history.

If they were any good they'd just deliver the pizza you were gonna order when you wanted it.

Pizza Hut wouldn’t take my order over the phone last time. They wanted me to order on line. I reckon they’re still waiting to take my order.
I make my own pizzas now.

Usually when you order online they want you to pay online...so No way. Take my take-out order over the phone or not at all. If I am having it delivered, which I never do except at work, then yes I will order and pay online.

quote:

Originally posted by Sportshooter:
Pizza Hut wouldn’t take my order over the phone last time. They wanted me to order on line. I reckon they’re still waiting to take my order.
I make my own pizzas now.

I had that happen too, I said never mind, I'll find someone else to order from.

Funny but scary, and yep most youth have grown up with computers in their pockets and love the apps that do this for them.

Local pizza/eyetaljun place does that, its in their database, your number, name, and what you usually order, I kinda like them remembering me, even though I know its on the computer...

My passport is up to date, so I"m good to go...

Post hurricane experiences are interesting for those that do not have "Old School" skills. Cash is the only commodity accepted and electronic cash registers do not work.

quote:

Originally posted by braillediver:
If they were any good they'd just deliver the pizza you were gonna order when you wanted it.

Yeah, like TGS ships gun parts. I’m waiting for them to up their game and start shipping stuff before I realize I need it.

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Sorry, completely disagree...

Google does not want you to know (or share with you) what they know about you and your personal life...

Google "believes" they are smarter then you and that they know what is better for you ~ than you know for yourself...

Google will take your meat pizza order, deliver the veg pizza, then blame you for ordering the wrong item if you call to complain...

Google doesn't care if you threaten to stop using them because they own approximately 90% of the online search engine market in the United States and across the world:
https://gs.statcounter.com/search-engine-market-share

Google sits back at laughs every time you sneak back to them for a quick little search because you can't find what you want when using another online search engine...

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This message has been edited. Last edited by: sleepla8er,