The recession has hit everybody really hard.
My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

CEO's are now playing miniature golf.

Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.

A stripper was killed when her audience showered her
with rolls of pennies while she danced.

I saw a Mormon with only one wife.

If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds,"
you call them and ask if they meant you or them.

McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.

Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.

Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned
their children's names.

My cousin had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay
for it, and they re-possessed her!

A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into
Mexico.

A picture is now only worth 200 words.

When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to
share a room.

The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed
by Somali pirates.


And, finally...
I was so depressed last night thinking about the Chinese
Flu, the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security,
retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a
call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal,
they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck

Ok, you helped me start my morning by smiling, so thank you!

Those were terrific.

Very good, every joke deserved a chuckle.

I saw a pic of the marque sign in front of a Stripper Club:

“Clothed until May”

Those were funny!