quote:

the teachers were so overwhelmed by the troublemakers that my kid just melted into the woodwork-because he wasn’t a problem. He was agreeable and friendly, etc so they were letting him slide with C’s while they dealt with actual terrors (I’m lighting this whole building on fire up kind of shit).

My kids were in private school before we started homeschooling, and this was exactly what was happening there, too, and a big part of why we pulled them. My oldest son is pretty self motivated and did ok in the environment, and he also had older, more experience teachers with better control of the classroom.

My daughter is very quiet and has trouble focusing. She had a series of young, fresh out of college teachers for several years in a row who had no idea how to manage a classroom. Kids were screaming, running around, throwing stuff, and the teachers had zero control. My daughter wasn't doing any of that stuff, but it was distracting enough that she couldn't focus. Somehow her grades were pretty good, I think mainly because the teachers just pushed everybody through. When they shut school down for COVID and we started working with her every day, we quickly realized that she wasn't where she should be academically and the school wasn't going to help her get there.

We started homeschooling the next fall, and the first few months were tough for her academically but within a few months she was back where she needed to be and could get her work done without constant help.

I would be happy to help you out with any further issues your son may have. I pretty much know the ins and outs of both the Lutheran and Catholic religions. I also consulted with an all boys Catholic boarding school for 15 years.

Very much appreciated. I’ll keep you posted. I was always in public school and did very well, so this feels weird to me, but it seems to be the right answer right now.
At the moment, we are ok, but some days I do feel like I get out of depth quickly!

I mentioned above about our granddaughters going to Mandarin immersion charter school. Most of the parents I believe are evangelical Christians as my daughter and her husband (and we) are, so I think there are a lot of parental barriers to woke brainwashing.

Our son and his wife have one son and are going to have another, God willing, in a little over two weeks. She is Catholic, my son has gone to mass with his wife since they were married (I'm delighted--he considered himself an atheist--and their kids will go to Catholic school in a quite conservative parish in Maryland. I think that will work out OK. As the time comes closer, I will ask about what the situation is in that school.