My son's anger issues came to a head tonight.

August 01, 2022, 11:08 AM

Fly-Sig

Mark, I don't have direct experience with your situation, but I am guardian of a disabled sibling plus have friends with autistic and mentally ill adult children.

Be sure to take care of yourself in all of this. You and your wife both. There is only so much that can be done for your son, and you are not obligated to sacrifice your entire lives in service to his illness. Do what you reasonably can, and let go of the rest.

August 01, 2022, 11:13 AM

mark123

quote:
Originally posted by arabiancowboy:
quote:
Originally posted by mark123:
quote:
Originally posted by ZSMICHAEL:
quote:
The doctor got on me last night telling me that I (Paraphrasing) should find a way to control the situation without coming to blows

^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Find a new psychologist. A team of behavioral health specialists to work with you as Mars Attacks suggests. That should be available in your area.
that was the ER doctor not the psychologist.

F that doctor, he isn’t living your life. Using violence against somebody I love is almost the worst thing I can imagine, the only thing worse would be allowing that person in a blind rage to inflict worse damage on somebody else I love. You were in an impossible situation, I empathize and will pray for you.

That's exactly what I feel. Thanks.

August 01, 2022, 12:05 PM

Ryanp225

Life doesn't come with any instructions and we all can only do what's within our limits.
Having limits doesn't make you a bad father. Remember that.

August 01, 2022, 12:14 PM

hurstolds1

Mark,
No advice to offer but prayers for your family.

August 01, 2022, 12:26 PM

HRK

Sorry to hear that happens, has to be extremely difficult situation, seems we have several members who have dealt with similar situations,

Hopefully with some of that information you can find someone or an organization that helps him out, best wishes to you all...

August 01, 2022, 12:31 PM

jhe888

I have no suggestions or help.

I am thinking of you and hope there is some solution that is workable.

August 01, 2022, 01:06 PM

sigmonkey

Autism can be a tough thing to deal with on both sides of the coin.

For as long as I have read your posts about Marky Mark, it is most apparent that you love him and your family with all you are.

I hate to read that it has become such a struggle.

Put me in the camp that is hopeful you find better assistance and a path to a less stressful environment.

August 01, 2022, 06:15 PM

dave7378

I'm very sorry to hear this Mark. Hurts my heart that you have to go through this with your child. He was just a little guy when we first met. If there is any way I can help, I am in. You know how to reach me.

August 01, 2022, 06:16 PM

KevinCW

quote:
Originally posted by mark123:
quote:
Originally posted by KevinCW:
Autism is very, very, VERY hard.

I deal with it on a day to day basis, not as a parent, but as the people the parents call when the simply "can't" any more. Which is really, quite often.

Side note, we are fucked either way on these calls most of the time. We are either TOO soft and someone gets hurt, or too "hard" and the person called on gets hurt. (Trust me, no one wants to have ANYONE get hurt)

I've been questioning is there a larger number of folks affected by thing recently, or is it just more diagnosed recently? Mental health calls have gone up (by my own experience) by a factor of 10 in the last 5 years.

And THOSE calls are the ones that get you fired/indicted.

ETA,

Mark, I'm not a psychiatrist, or a therapist, but I DO have some experience in the mental health field.

I'm very sorry you are going through this and it certainly must be tough.

If there is ANYTHING i can do to help, provide guideance, or even give my thoughts/guidance (of course, from a more LE perspective), then PLEASE email me and I'll give you my number and we can talk. ANY time of day, and ANY time of night.

I hope for all the best my friend.

I will take you up on that. Thank you.

The doctor got on me last night telling me that I (Paraphrasing) should find a way to control the situation without coming to blows. I would like to know how law enforcement handles this situation. I tried being calm with a light hug, i tried a restraining with a more forceful hold, i tried, holding him down while controlling his head to avoid biting. This only made him more and more violent. Luckily, he's a sloppy and wild fighter or else I may not be here to type this.

I said "great idea, doctor. What techniques would you use when someone is attacking you? I'm all ears."

I've been thinking about this all night.

Shoot me an email, and I'll give you my number so we can talk.

August 01, 2022, 07:16 PM

mark123

We had a really good discussion with the Marky's psychologist. There are some options for Marky where he can go to in place of a work day or two where he learns life skills. Cooking for himself and handling money and such. These are things he won't allow us to teach him as he feels were being critical when we correct him. This is a huge problem for us as he takes correction from us as a terrible insult. A small step but a positive one, I hope.

August 01, 2022, 07:18 PM

ZSMICHAEL

^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Good to hear. Activities of daily living are critical. Glad to hear he will receiving instruction.

August 01, 2022, 09:02 PM

SigSentry

I'm afraid I'm a broken record. I'm aware know nothing about autism personally or how particular he is about he food choices. I just continue to be a voice for avoiding most of the crap that's pushed on us by Big Food. Now you can tell me to stfu. I'm sorry you are in this situation and I hope it gets better.

Edit, I just saw you mentioned low-carb. Perhaps if he thinks it helps him it won't be perceived as punishment. Not sure how ribeye can be punishment. Praying for relief.