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W07VH5 |
Edit- I guess I shouldn't assume that everyone knows that he's autistic. Just got into bed when the screams and crashes started. I went to see what the issue was. Something about he's upset because he didn't follow directions. I gave a hug and said it's ok but that triggered an attack. The shoving and grabbing turned into biting and hitting. It ended when I bloodied his nose. We're at the ER getting him checked out now. I seem to be unscathed but he wrenched my neck pretty well. The wife and I are so tired of living in fear of him and walking on eggshells which doesn't stop the rage anyway. I don't know what to do. I'm simply distraught. | ||
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| Member |
I don't have any words of wisdom for you, but love, empathy, and prayers go out to you all from us. | |||
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Member |
I'm sorry to hear this. I can't imagine how difficult this must be for you. What comes to mind is the story about footprints in the sand. And the single track of footprints are yours while you carry your son. "Wrong does not cease to be wrong because the majority share in it." L.Tolstoy "A government is just a body of people, usually, notably, ungoverned." Shepherd Book | |||
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| Get my pies outta the oven!  |
How old is he? If you are living in fear of him, have you considered placing him somewhere else to live? | |||
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| W07VH5 |
He's 24 and crazy strong. I fear that we are going to have to place him in some sort of an assisted living home. This doesn't happen all the time but he's just a ticking time bomb with no discernible countdown. | |||
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| W07VH5 |
I edited the OP mentioning that he's autistic. | |||
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| Member |
It just tears my heart out to know you all have to go through this…the love and pain. Lord, please help this family, please. | |||
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Nullus Anxietas |
My heart goes out to you, Mark. I cannot imagine what it must be like trying to deal with such a situation  "America is at that awkward stage. It's too late to work within the system,,,, but too early to shoot the bastards." -- Claire Wolfe "If we let things terrify us, life will not be worth living." -- Seneca the Younger, Roman Stoic philosopher | |||
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| W07VH5 |
Thanks everyone. The worst part is when I end up hurting him, I just feel like such a jerk. | |||
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Lost |
You ain't a jerk, Mark, you're a concerned parent dealing with a difficult situation the best way you can. I don't know if this would be of help, but.... I, too, once had a serious problem with anger and irritability, all stemming from a Traumatic Brain Injury I received decades ago. I finally found a relatively new treatment called LLLT, Low Level Light Therapy (also Low Level Laser Therapy). Bathing your cranium with light of a certain wavelength has been shown to stimulate neuron growth and repair (transcranial, i.e. the light passes right through the skull into the frontal cortices of the brain). I mocked up some LED panels and underwent treatment. After about 2 years, not only did the anger sessions disappear, my migraine headaches, also from the trauma, completely went away as well. Whether something like this might be useful for your situation is hard to answer, but initial studies show significant, even dramatic benefit for autism sufferers and TBI victims like me. | |||
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| W07VH5 |
I'd definitely like to hear more about it. | |||
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Res ipsa loquitur |
I have a close friend who had the same problem. Ultimately, they had to place his son in a developmental center. It seems to have worked out well. He has peers and professional help and they can have a safe relationship. Still, it was a hard decision. Good luck to all of you. __________________________ | |||
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| Lost |
I ordered some LED panels from eBay (they're usually sold as grow lights for personal MJ cultivation). Not very expensive. I suspended them over my desk, and keep them on for several hours a day (an alternate approach is to place them much closer to the head, and doing shorter sessions like 20 minutes several times a week). There are numerous studies you can search online for, mostly with very encouraging results. E.g. LLLT Study on Autism  LLLT - 1 by kpkina, on Flickr | |||
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| SF Jake |
That LLLT thing seems cool….definitely worth looking at more in depth. Good luck Mark, it’s a difficult and painful situation to endure … ________________________ Those who trade liberty for security have neither | |||
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| W07VH5 |
Interesting. Thank you. If you come across a model number or have a link to share drop me a note. I'll do some research tomorrow. | |||
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| Lost |
This is pretty close to the panels I use. | |||
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| W07VH5 |
Thanks so much. | |||
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| Member |
My wife is an autism specialist at a local school district. Some of the stories she has are just heartbreaking. Prayers out to you and your son! “Everybody's got plans...until they get hit.” Mike Tyson | |||
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| Member |
So sorry for your situation... It sounds like you needed to vent or reach out. I am sending the bulk of my reply via your email due to the sensitive nature... ...You do what you can then you do what you have to do. Prayers for all concerned. Collecting dust. | |||
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| Veteran of the Psychic Wars |
My stepson was not autistic, but, he had serious anger issues. One afternoon, he went into a rage and attacked me. He is no longer with us... ...the absolute worst day of my life. All I can say is that you and your wife must find some help getting your son's issues within some bounds of control. Anger is fine, rage that leads to violence is not good. 24 is hella strong. Find help or get him out the house. I hate to be blunt. __________________________ "just look at the flowers..." | |||
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