Hold the phone. My 3 kids (23 to 34) ALL had kindergarten graduations. Social event? Sure. Bunch of foo-foo? No. Anything that makes a kid feel good, maybe a little proud with a sense of accomplishment is a good thing. If they have no concept of success, how are they going to get anywhere?

My 4 year old son goes to a private christian academy a few days a week, and has since he was 2.

He was in a 2-3 year old, not even Pre-K class, and they had a graduation. Half the kids wouldn't even sit on the stage and ran back to mommy.

In a few weeks, he goes to his 4 year old graduation class (still not even pre-k). Yippy.

I look forward (not) to a class graduation EVERY damn year. Yay.

Next year he goes to Pre-K. There will surely be a graduation for that. Then the following year goes to kindergarten. Another graduation. And Im sure he'll have another graduation in 1st grade too. Its ridiculous.

Some of you obviously don't have kids. "Everybody gets a ribbon", "snowflakes"?? Frankly I love my 6yo and am proud of ALL her milestones and accomplishments.

quote:

Originally posted by dry-fly:
Some of you obviously don't have kids. "Everybody gets a ribbon", "snowflakes"?? Frankly I love my 6yo and am proud of ALL her milestones and accomplishments.

Everyone was once a child, though. If a child gets a trophy or celebration for every minor activity, how will that child ever learn what is really consequential and worthy of praise?

It is fine for you to love your 6yo and be proud of all her milestones and accomplishments, but it is not logical for the whole world to do so for normal progress.

flashguy

Tough crowd. Maybe you guys can attack birthday parties next.

Sorry flashguy, I don't agree at all. We don't celebrate *every* accomplishment as you suggest. Having a little kids graduation after a year of school is not excessive for us. As noted, maybe we should do away with birthday parties... that requires NO effort, you body simply lived another year.

I was once a child and lived during a time in which there were no "graduation" ceremonies for any levels other than 8th grade, high school and college. I didn't even have an 8th grade graduation because I attended an "Intermediate" school (7-9) and elected to go on to high school for the 9-12 grades. Back then, in my area (Detroit, Michigan) it was normal for schools to be K-8 and 9-12, only a few 7-9 schools existed. I don't think I was deprived by not having those lower level ceremonies, and my folks certainly would not have been happy having to rent gowns, etc. for them (we didn't have a lot of money).

Back in the 1950s, graduation from high school was a mark of distinction (not everyone made it) and a change in life for many--not everyone expected to attend college and lots of jobs only required a HS diploma to qualify. Graduation from college was a really significant event, of course. In today's more competitive world, even graduation from HS is of little significance as most decent jobs now require a college degree (and shouldn't). The whole education system is messed up and many college graduates today can't even function as well as HS graduates did when I graduated.

Maybe I am "tough" (although I don't think so), but so is the hard world out there. Lavish attention and love on your own kids--that's what parents are for (partially)--but I don't agree with making a big deal out of events that traditionally have not been of great note. (Birthdays? Again, celebrate them as you wish. As a child I only had one birthday party in which anyone other than extended family was involved. I've had better parties at work.)

flashguy

Sorry you didn't have more celebratory events growing up flashguy, you seem to have lived through it. I fail to see how how a kids graduation ceremony is going to stunt my girls life. I think she's going to be a fine young woman, her mom and I are working hard to ensure that.

Dry-fly, I was not complaining about having few celebratory events in my childhood--just that everyone was in the same boat and no one expected more. There were no "pre-schools" at all and some districts didn't even have "Kindergarten"--kids just started 1st grade when they got to be the right age. And yes, we mostly all grew up to be decent, productive citizens with good self-esteem.

I'm also not decrying your interest in promoting your own kids--have at it! Just don't be hard on us who think multiple graduations are unnecessary and excessive.

flashguy

I'm 36 and had never heard of these "graduation" ceremonies until maybe about a decade ago. I thought then, and I still believe, that they are absurd.

I truly do not understand the distinction between these events and participation trophies. Even before social promotion was commonplace in the public school systems, it was the exception for any child to be held back.

Unless the goal is some sort of self-esteem building exercise (which would require another conversation entirely), I honestly don't appreciate the special accomplishment that warrants a community celebration.

Why not have high school graduations after every grade? Or college graduations after every semester? Seriously. What would be the difference?

"Congratulations - you're neither too lazy to fail, nor are you an imbecile." That's likely what I'll be tempted to write in a card if I'm ever compelled to attend one of these things.

I just don't get it.

-Rob

^^^^^^^^ I'm with you, flashguy, and others who think this is stupid and not unlike participation trophies for everyone.

Completely unnecessary. You want to build your kid's self-esteem? Give him a pat on the back, tousle his hair and say "good job".

When I was a kid, our reward for making it through a grade was being able to move on to the next grade with our friends rather than being held back. In 12 years of school I can think of only one kid who was held back and he ended up being retarded.

If we continually celebrate and reward mediocrity, that's all we're going to get.

The only graduation ceremony we had around here was high school. We had four different grade schools for the town (1-6), then all kids went to the same 7th grade, then to 8th and 9th grades in a different building, then on to high school (10-12) at a still different building. Nowadays that would require four separate graduation ceremonies.

Nope. You celebrate and reward achievement and accomplishment that took effort. Making it through pre-K (isn't that what moms used to be for?) is neither an achievement nor an accomplishment worthy of public reward. It is simply a milestone.

quote:

Originally posted by BurtonRW:
I truly do not understand the distinction between these events and participation trophies.
-Rob

Totally agree.

quote:

Originally posted by ZSMICHAEL:
Headstart has had graduations for years. For some individuals this is their terminal degree and only graduation ceremony.

Savage.

quote:

Originally posted by radioman:
Tough crowd. Maybe you guys can attack birthday parties next.

Nah, they are too busy turning themselves into the Police for Jaywalking, speeding 2 MPH over the limit, and spitting on the sidewalk to go after B-day parties. Oh, and I forgot singing in the Church Choir.

I'm almost 44, and I had a kindergarten graduation ceremony in the late 70s

It didn't stunt my drive because it was a "participation" trophy, nor did it stop me from getting to the other 4 graduation ceremonies that I've had (high school, college, grad school, law school)

Those of you comparing this to participation trophies clearly don't understand what those are

Participation trophies are things given to people WHO DIDN'T ACTUALLY ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING

In this instance, that comparison is only valid if the graduation ceremony is also for KIDS WHO DIDNT ACTUALLY FINISH KINDERGARTEN

For those that did, they have accomplished what they set out to do. You may diminish their accomplishment as minor, but now we are talking about perspective. Sure, finishing kindergarten seems trivial to an adult. But it sure as shit doesn't to most kindergarteners

I have three children. One who is in kindergarten right now. When she "graduates" I will sure as shit show up with a camera and tell her she did a good job. The same way I did when the older two went through the same thing

Some of you are a cynical, bitter lot

It's fun for the kids. It's fun for the parents. No one...NO ONE...recognizes it as a Nobel prize level accomplishment

Lighten up, Francis

not as worried about the kids as I am the parents, Have you seen some of the people that are raising kids these days ?

In some of the schools , the parents give absolutely no attention to their kids education, None!

All some of these parents know is that the kids are out of their hair for 5 hours a day, they could not give half a shit as to what the kid may or not be learning.

unless the kids are special needs kids, most can figure out who was better at what.
Some of these parents? not so much

quote:

Originally posted by RHINOWSO:

quote:

Originally posted by radioman:
Tough crowd. Maybe you guys can attack birthday parties next.

Nah, they are too busy turning themselves into the Police for Jaywalking, speeding 2 MPH over the limit, and spitting on the sidewalk to go after B-day parties. Oh, and I forgot singing in the Church Choir.

Now you've done it! That was uncalled for. I have been civil all through this discussion.

These minor "graduations" are, in fact, a form of participation trophy, because they impart a community recognition to actions that have little real significance to the community. Give your loved child a party at home if you want to (I don't remember ever getting one), but don't embroider the normal progression with a community ceremony. If children see that they will be rewarded with a community celebration for every little (yes, little--almost no one fails Pre-school or Kindergarten) accomplishment, they will come to expect such treatment to continue, and will be very traumatized when that ceases to be the case.

I am done. I will not respond further. (And I DO sing in the Church Choir!)

flashguy

quote:

Originally posted by OKCGene:
Everybody gets a trophy....

^ This. I went to one graduation throughout my public education, high school graduation. Tired of the helicopter tickle children's asses with a feather society.

quote:

Originally posted by BurtonRW:
I'm 36 and had never heard of these "graduation" ceremonies until maybe about a decade ago. I thought then, and I still believe, that they are absurd.

I truly do not understand the distinction between these events and participation trophies. Even before social promotion was commonplace in the public school systems, it was the exception for any child to be held back.

Unless the goal is some sort of self-esteem building exercise (which would require another conversation entirely), I honestly don't appreciate the special accomplishment that warrants a community celebration.

Why not have high school graduations after every grade? Or college graduations after every semester? Seriously. What would be the difference?

"Congratulations - you're neither too lazy to fail, nor are you an imbecile." That's likely what I'll be tempted to write in a card if I'm ever compelled to attend one of these things.

I just don't get it.

-Rob

Do you have kids? I am guessing no. I couldn't imagine telling my 5 year old that she can't attend their kindergarten graduation because it's just a participation trophy that is meaningless and will undoubtedly piss off a bunch of old curmudgeons on the interwebs.

It's a fun, social gathering. Nothing more, nothing less. Some of you just look for a reason to bitch. The downfall of society did not begin with, and is not perpetuated by, kindergarten graduation ceremonies, I assure you.

A little ceremony might be okay, but it would be easy to take it too far.